One last fling

Night_Sprite

The end of Fishy's poll got me thinking.  Do you or FI feel compelled to have one last fling?

Sooles

nope. but we have both agreed that shoudl we feel the need at any point, we get permission first. (i have been flamed for this in the past but you know what? we are both ok with this.)

RachNRich

Me: No. FI: What the hell kind of question is that? Where are you reading that from? The Knot? Unequivocally, no.

louisvillebride21

As in having sex i.e. cheating on each other before the wedding??

bbyckes

No, sometimes it's more than I need to "fling" with FI.  I'm good.

Night_Sprite

Rach, did you listen to your voicemail?

ggmae

No and no. I'm pretty sure DH and I are on the same page with this one.

EmmaBride2B

Maybe I'm just traditional... but if one or the other wants to sleep with other people you should probably be dating, not getting married.

Night_Sprite

Well there's the whole concept of the bachelor/ette being the last hurrah.  The last random stripper.  The last whatever.  I just find the idea interesting and weird that people view marriage like such a prison.

Brie2010

No.  We are both happy with our numbers, different though they may be.

RachNRich

bhahahah I just listened to it about 5 minutes ago (I never have my ringer on. ever--the second I turn it on, it ends up ringing at the worst possible time ever). I died laughing.

BecW2be

We flinged like a couple of rabbits the entire weekend before the wedding. With each other, of course, but I digress...

louisvillebride21

I don't think I see marriage like a prison, but I sure as hell see at as you're only boinking me for the rest of your life...

laurenclaire1386

I don't have a desire to.  I don't think FI does either.  If he has, he hasn't told me about it.  If he does want one last fling, we're not getting married periodendofstory.

missy68

Nope.  And, nope. I don't even think he cares too much about strip clubs, even though he knows he can go (private room lap dances are no-nos, though).Hell, I don't even get the proverbial "freebie"!! In all seriousness, no desire.  And Capri, I feel you on that ... some days, it's enough/too much!!

Night_Sprite

I'm glad you liked it.  I can sing you a real song someday, as well. 

ggmae

I don't think I see marriage like a prison, but I sure as hell see at as you're only boinking me for the rest of your life...I couldn't have said it better.

brookelynpaisley

It's too late now anyway, but no. I never felt a reason for a fling. I think if I had, it'd have been a sign I shouldn't be getting married. I have a feeling he'd answer the same way.

Night_Sprite

Do you all think the one last fling idea is reserved for movies and television because it seems so undesirable in real relationships? 

bbyckes

I missed part of the question:  I don't think (I pretty much know) that FI is not interested in a last fling.  He is not wired like that.  Not a cheater in the least.

Brie2010

It took FI over a year to fling me.  I don't think he'll have time for another one before the wedding.

louisvillebride21

I don't know if its reserved for movies or not, but honestly, I'm appalled at the question. I have no idea why, but the thought really bothers me. I know we both thought long and hard about what we wanted before the proposal happened. Once he was on his knee, that was it for us.

laurenclaire1386

Once I was old enough to get the concept of monogamous relationships, it undid any idea I had about bachelor parties.  I think the sleep-with-someone-else-the-night-before-your-wedding concept is a complete myth.  No one has ever done this and still gotten married the next day.  Or if you have, please tell me about it.

Night_Sprite

Just to be clear, I'm not flinging anyone but FI.

louisvillebride21

I am loving the new term for sex, however

polichik

No, but I also feel that the whole bachelor party-endorsed "One last night of freedom!!!11!!! Fcuk yeah!!!" is absurd and completely disrespectful to the notion of marriage. If somebody views marriage as the end of freedom, that's a red flag to me. Don't f'in get married. . If the couple is the swinger type, I don't see that as wrong. But if they're otherwise monogamous, it seems so weird to me. Goodness knows there's nothing like sex with another person to start out a good, healthy, monogamous marriage.

saschaduran

Uh...helll no. I had more than enough flings to last me a lifetime. And he better not have had one. If I found out that my H slept with a woman at his bachelor party days before getting married I would file for divorce. He was not "single" when we were engaged. He was single before we dated. He got to have sex with strippers then. If you feel the need to sleep with one more person, then you are probably not ready to get married.

louisvillebride21

If the couple is the swinger type, I don't see that as wrongNot my cup of tea, but I totally agree. It's not my place to judge a lifestyle, but I think it's totally ok to judge someone for an unapproved flinging.

PreppySailor

I think the one last fling is a creation of the media. If Fi wants to be flung he can tell me and I'll do the flinging for him.

bel138

FI and I have only ever flinged each other. He's too much of a weenie to even ask another girl fling; I put all the moves on him.I agree that the whole concept skeeves me out. Really? Sleeping with me the rest of your life is so bad you have to go bang a random stranger? It's still cheating, whether or not there is a wedding ring. We were exclusive since our first date, so any fling would be a dealbreaker.

missy68

I think it just plays into that stereotype male think of "I'm not gonna get any more after I'm married!!"So many movies and TV shows take what is a simple concept in life (i.e., things DO change after marriage - you see someone 24/7, you're going to see them at their worst when prior, you'd probably only ever seen them at their best) and blow it up into a caricature larger than life.  Think about those artists at the mall who draw the cartoons with the heads larger than the bodies - they pick one outstanding feature (the one I had done focused on my boobs) and accentuate that, almost to comic effect. Same thing.Then, the "urban legend" type stuff begins to perpetuate. Some of it's probably cases of cold feet and fear of never being with anyone else again, but that should be a brief feeling and the never being with anyone else again feeling should be comforting.  At least in my mind.And, there's my rambling for the night.