Thank you everyone who helped me with the dilemma about inviting the guy who raped me because he was dating a friend. If you didn't see it:
http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_tell-me-i-dont-have-to-invite-this-person_.0 I have heard since then that my friend broke up with him, he left his job (or was fired, I don't know), and has moved out of state. I'm so relieved that I don't have to deal with this anymore. I really didn't want to invite him and I didn't want to see him.