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Wedding Etiquette Forum
cmmosley81
member
Cash Bar/ Consumption Bar
I am have a venue with a 5 hour time block. They give a 1 hour open bar with the price. I wasnt thinking twice about it I was just figuring that I would put on the invites cash bar. I dont drink neiter do 1/3 of the guests. Is it rude to put that? I have a very small budget 10K and half of it is going to the venue so to cut corners is hard. On the CT board they mentioned a consumption bar what is that? Please help
60 Invited
Attending
Declined
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RSVP Date September 15, 2011
Attending
Declined
Not Replied
RSVP Date September 15, 2011
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Cash Bar/ Consumption Bar
The best thing to do is host what you can afford. Could you cover beer and wine in your budget? And, whatever you do, make sure it's the same for the full 5 hours. It's not great, but will be ok, if you close the bar during dinner. But when it reopens it needs to be the same as before.
Talk to your venue, and see what options they offer.
Dresses may be easier to take in than let out, but guest lists are not. -- kate51485
[QUOTE]OK so what about a <strong>combination bar</strong>? I feel really stupid having to ask all this but I never thought I would have to worry about the bar.
Posted by cmmosley81[/QUOTE]
Correct me if I'm wrong but a combination bar is when you have a combination of both open bar and cash bar, yes? There are limitations on the bar of what is hosted. If they want anything about the hosted bar then it's cash?
Asking your guests to pay for their drinks is considered rude. If you were inviting them to your home for dinner, would you ask them to pay for their food or drink?
If a number of your guests don't drink, then having a consumption bar (paying based on what is used) would likely be cheaper than a per person charge. Whatever you decide, it should be consistent throughout the reception.
[QUOTE]I feel really stupid having to ask all this but I never thought I would have to worry about the bar.
Posted by cmmosley81[/QUOTE]
i don't get it. did you read the contract before signing it?
[QUOTE]OK so what about a combination bar? I feel really stupid having to ask all this but I never thought I would have to worry about the bar.
Posted by cmmosley81[/QUOTE]
Personally, I feel like you should host what you can afford (even if that's only beer and wine) and not have any form of cash bar at all. People should not have to pay in any way, shape, or form to attend your wedding. Your guests will drink what you have available.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cash Bar/ Consumption Bar : Personally, I feel like you should host what you can afford (even if that's only beer and wine) and not have any form of cash bar at all. <strong>People should not have to pay in any way, shape, or form to attend your wedding.</strong> Your guests will drink what you have available.
Posted by twilight.rose[/QUOTE]
<div>This is only an opinion. You can serve beer and wine and give your guests the option to pay for a mixed drink if they want one. Most guests appreciate the option to purchase a drink of their choice even if it's not what you're hosting. </div>
Daffodil-The venue has nothing in there contract about anything but and open bar for one hour then a cash bar after that. I am going to call them on tuesday and ask about it. I dont drink so I never gave it a second thought.
As far as doing beer and wine for the rest of the time it is 15 per person to pay for 4 hours of beer and wine but I have to pay for all 60 people even if they dont drink. I cant say to them only 40 people will be drinking so I only want to pay for them. Also the venue only allows people tp get so many drinks an hour so there in my mind I am paying a lot for alochol that isnt going to be drank.
I am already trying to cut things out of my budget. As I said I have a 10K budget and that is so tight right now. I have 5K going to the venue, 1000 to dresses ( I have to buy the FG and a BM dress, my daughter and my sister who I assume responsiblity for) A lot of DIY is in play I dont even have a photog cuz it isnt in the budget
If you can talk to them about a consumption bar for beer and wine I'd try to do that.
Remember, just because you choose to drink alcohol free beverages does not mean you should decide that alcohol is therefore off limits to your guests. The 2/3 of your guests that do may be a bit put off.
Are the 40 people who drink heavy drinkers? If they aren't, would it be possible to do a consumption bar (where you pay for each drink consumed)? I'd ask the venue what they charge per drink and then figure out what options would fit into your budget.
If they are your friends and family they will come celebrate with you regardless if their is an open bar or cash bar seems like too many women on here watch too many shows not everyone can afford an open bar and your friends and family will not look down on you for that ..
[QUOTE]If they are your friends and family they will come celebrate with you regardless if their is an open bar or cash bar seems like too many women on here watch too many shows not everyone can afford an open bar and your friends and family will not look down on you for that ..
Posted by ladydiy2004[/QUOTE]
It isn't about watching wedding shows. It's about fulfilling your responsibilities as a host in doing what is appropriate.
Sure if I'm friends with someone having a cash bar I'll still go to the wedding. But I will definitely think that it's in poor taste for him or her to do so because what they'd be doing IS in fact poor taste.
If you don't want people to be upset, follow proper etiquette. Everyone has a budget of some kind. Asking the guests to help chip in to defray the costs should never be something that hosts consider.
[QUOTE]Fullfilling your responsibilities as a host does not include paying for alcohol too as long as you provide non alcoholic drinks, since when do weddings have to have alcohol?? I dont eat Chicken so should the host buy me steak instead?
Posted by ladydiy2004[/QUOTE]
No. However the host should not offer you steak at your cost if she's only serving chicken.
The hosts should have an event that they can host within their means. At no time during that event should the guests be asked to pay for anything that they want. Anything available to them should be hosted and not available at an additional cost.
That means that she can go dry and not serve alcohol at all. But if she offers the alcohol that some guests may expect then she needs to pay for it. To not do so is not appropriate.
When people say "Your guests shouldn't be asked to buy anything they would want" I don't really understand that. If I want to buy a drink at someone's wedding no one's asking me to. I'm making the decision to do so.
And a guest graciously accepts what is offered to him or her and does not ask for anything more.
And a guest graciously accepts what is offered to him or her and does not ask for anything more.