Wedding Etiquette Forum

Sending invitations

soooo...as i take a deep breath....

We have a venue cap of 175 guest and not willing to change venues.  Before I attack the guest list again and cut people, I'd really like to consider just sending out my A list invitations super early to get a better idea on head count. Also to consider, most guests are coming in from out of town, therefore need hotel reservations, and we're not planning on sending save-the-dates (as of yet) because of course we can't pin down the guest list.

And the real question is, how early can I start sending invitations and requesting responses?  I don't know the etiquette on that.

Re: Sending invitations

  • Posting a single post 3 times must be the new cool thing.

    You will not get a good response with A/B invite list, JSYK.

    I'd send your invites out 6-8 weeks before the wedding date, and have your RSVP date about a month after you've sent them out.
  • Maybe if you ask a 4th time I'll answer.
    image
  • first time lucky
    third time a charm
  • A/B lists are always a bad idea. In part because it's rude to have your guests commit to attending your wedding more than a month out.


  • talk to the knot about it...said there was an issue posting first and second...now how about some real responses




  • image
    Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?

    "cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
  • the only real response you're going to get is that what you're doing is rude.
  • And ditto jess.



    image
    Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?

    "cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_sending-invitations-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:35b2aede-ca23-47e6-a4f5-5aade7f6e804Post:f29716c2-c188-43dc-bdab-3a7bfb9001a8">Re: Sending invitations</a>:
    [QUOTE]...now how about some real responses
    Posted by jeniferata[/QUOTE]

    I gave you a real response.

    But FWIW, that statement will probably keep you from getting "real" responses.
  • Don't send Save the Dates - you'll be stuck with that list once you send those out.  And no, you can't send them to some people and not others.  They WILL find out and feelings will be hurt.

    Don't do A/B lists.  Same reason as why you shouldn't send Save the Dates to some and not all.

    PS - With the multiple posts, the knot has been acting up (as usual) and if you refresh or click post more than once, this is the result.
  • Easy there, jenifer.  I deleted the extras.  Invitations are sent out 6 - 8 weeks in advance of the event.  Maybe a maximum of 10 weeks.  RSVP by dates should be no more than 4 weeks/30 days in advance of the event. 
    DIY & Planning | Married 

    Married: 2010
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    Mom to H: 2014

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    Dresses may be easier to take in than let out, but guest lists are not. -- kate51485
  • thank you.
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