Registries and Parent/Child dances??

moldro

I have a pretty bad relationship with my father but my fiance has a good relationship with his mother. Is it wrong for them to have a mother/son dance but for me to not dance with my father? Our relationship isn't so bad that he's not invited (I'm definitely inviting him) but, I'm not sure I want him involved more than just being a guest. Should I just suck it up and let him play the father part for the day? I'm his only child and as much as I don't like the idea of pretending he's been a dad to me, I think I may regret it later. If you think I should involve him can you give me some ideas for non-cheesy songs that don't talk about how he was there or anything like that?

Also, is it wrong to not have a registry? My fiance and I won't be needing anything for the house. We would like monetary gifts to put on a down payment on a house but, I keep seeing that it is wrong to ask for that. Is it really wrong or could we just not register anywhere and mention it (the down payment) to people who ask? I don't want to end up with a bunch of stuff that we won't use or need.

Beachy730

If you are thinking you will regret not having the father/daughter dance, then just have it.  You can pick a shorter song, or have the DJ or band cut it short if its longer.  My dad and I danced to "The Way You Look Tonight" because it wasn't a sappy song.  I'm very close with my dad, but we aren't the type to dance to "Butterfly Kisses" or any other sappy song like that.  Another option you could do is to have both the father/daughter and mother/son dance done at the same time.  Not sure how your FI or his mom would feel about that though.

You are right about the registry, it is rude to ask for cash.  We also had just about everything we needed for our house, but registered for replacement things, like new, really nice towels, and silverware and things to replace our old sets that weren't as nice.  I would just create a small registry at Target or Bed Bath and Beyond with a some items that you need or could replace.  If people ask your BMs or parents or anyone what you would prefer, then they could say something like "They have a small registry at Target, but also wouldn't mind a monetary gifts."  We knew we were moving across country soon after our wedding, so would have preferred a cash shower, but we registered anyways and were shocked at how much we found.  Many people gave us cash anyways or Target gift cards just knowing that we were moving and it would be easier. 

SassyBrass

You can always think of a fun type song to dance to. An old classmate of mine did the dance from Pulp Fiction with her dad. It was fun and not sappy. If it's something you find you want to do, you don't have to do one of those typical songs. Think of something short and upbeat like a Beatles tune. Gives him the "dad" role without being fake.
I didn't want to register for gifts, but everyone kept bugging me about it and saying to me that we were getting a gift anyway. So I sucked it up and registered for a bunch of yard stuff and kitchen gadgets. Most of the things we registered for, we didn't get, or got a different version of. It ended up being almost pointless. But it is good if you want to upgrade some things. People will get you stuff if they want to, regardless of how many times you tell them you don't need stuff. Better to give them an answer or at least a guideline.
But yeah, straight up asking for money is rude. It's likely you'll have monetary gifts from some people if that helps.