Who paid/is paying for your wedding?

tlv204

I'm sure we've asked this before, but after that snarky brides post I'm curious. Who paid for or will pay for your wedding?

Stackeye210

We paid for everything ourselves.  We had lots of DIY help from both families, but ultimately all of the financial stuff was on us.

TheSaltyPeanut

80% of the wedding was paid by us, the rest was spread out between H's family and my parents/step parents.

laurenclaire1386

My parents volunteered to pay for the whole wedding, but FI and I are saving and contributing as much as we can.

beatlesgirl25

I picked "other." We paid for it with my parents and did a ton of DIY. His parents offered to pay for our "welcome dinner" for WP/OOT guests, which took the place of an RD.

ohwhynot

We are, and it's a budget wedding (well, I consider it a budget wedding - I know many couples are spending less). We are each contributing between 3k and 3.5k. 

danieliza1127

It's was pretty much evenly split between us, my parents, and my FI's parents if you include the RD.  If anything, we paid maybe a $1,000 more than each of them. 

bbyckes

We are paying for the majority of the wedding and the majority of this - I'm paying.  My mom has pitched and helped with a bunch of stuff - she's awesome.  I have yet to hear a peep from his side or my dad.

julezlee

My mom paid for my dress (which is the only reason I got that dress, otherwise I would have bought something cheaper) and my parents gave us some other money and the remaining 3/4 of the wedding expenses were all paid for by DH and me.  

FutureMrsTR

My mom had a certain amount saved up and is contributing that.  His parents decided to give us a set amount of money now and that's our wedding gift and they won't be hosting a rehearsal dinner or anything.  We can use it any way we want.  We were planning on using half for the wedding and saving half.  We're creeping over half a little bit, but we're handling it, haha. 

We've been really lucky in that, for the most part, neither of our parents are imposing a lot of strings with the money.

ootmother2

Back in the dark ages, my father paid for my wedding as he did for my sister.

My ExH and I paid for M's wedding.  Groom's parents paid for the RD and they paid for their rings and HM

sucrets4

I can't see polls, but my parents probably paid for 40%, DH's parents 20%, us 40%.  (not including rings and HM)

sarah0725

As far as I know, we're paying the bulk of it. Both sets of parents have made some noise about helping at some point, but they haven't given us any dollar amounts so we're not counting on anything in particular. By the time the wedding comes around, we will have been saving for three years, and so we should be in pretty good shape.

SarahPLiz

We are paying for everything, including the RD and his parent's travel to come here. Technically, FI is paying for most because he makes more and can save more, but we view our income as shared, so we are paying for everything.

At Christmas, my godmother made the offer to pay for my flowers, up to $500. I wasn't planning on spending that much, and I told her so, but she really wanted to contribute. That just frees up money for us to use for other things, so I really appreciate it, but we had planned to pay for it all ourselves.

hayleymajayley

We put in about 4k my parents are paying the rest. We are trying to do it cheaply... I think they'll probably put in about 5k? Gosh that's a lot of money. I'm starting to feel bad... hahaha.

beatlesgirl25

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_paidis-paying-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:73845b25-5eea-4719-bda1-a5c5e3237932Post:327599b8-d146-4755-9c43-8870b838d09d">Re: Who paid/is paying for your wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>My mom paid for my dress (which is the only reason I got that dress, otherwise I would have bought something cheaper)</strong> and my parents gave us some other money and the remaining 3/4 of the wedding expenses were all paid for by DH and me.  
Posted by julezlee[/QUOTE]

Julez - Your mom is awesome. :)

cengle

My parents bought my dress, and we were very lucky in that his parents offered to pay for the RD, as well as the per-head cost of the reception.  DH and I paid for the rest of the stuff, the DJ, flowers, church, etc.

Catwoman708

I am most recently the MOB, and paid for most of the wedding for our daughter, as a gift.  I paid for her attire, the catering, DJ, and paid for and DIY'd the flowers, decorations, invitations, and friends helped with dress alterations and photography.  The parents of the groom paid for the RD, the priest donation, helped with invitations, the groom's cake, the groom's tux, and some of the ancillary items (guest book, cake and toasting sets...). 

Way back when I got married, my mom paid for part of my dress and the flowers, Dad paid for the invitations, and we paid for everything else.

Lyss5782

We are paying, but my parents have certainly helped.  They gave us a big chunk of money when we first got engaged, but we wound up using it on a down payment for a house instead of the wedding.  My mom also paid for my dress and Im sure they are planning on giving us more from their "wedding fund" (their words!) but since I dont know how much that will be I just pretend it doesn't exist.

pumpkinpumpkin

none of the above. We were going to pay for about 90% of it ourselves. So it's neither us, my parents, his parents, or evenly split. Now Mark and I are paying for all except the dress my mom bought for me before Mark got sick.

aMrsin09

My dad did have a small wedding fund set up for both my sis and I, but when the time came I found out that he had given my portion to my sis as a wedding gift since he figured I wouldn't ever get married.  yeah...

We paid for it 100%.

JK10910

We're paying for most of the major costs ourselves.  His parents are doing the RD, and my parents are picking up random things here and there like my dress (ok, not random, but you know), centerpieces, cheesecake...basically anything my mom and I talked about and I said "Eh, I don't care"  and she said "BUT OMG YOU HAAAAVE TO I'LL PAY FOR IT!"  (Ok, not quite that dramatic, but you get the picture.)

baystateapple

We're paying for the majority of it, but my parents are chipping in here and there, and FI's mom offered to pay for the STDs and the DJ.  I'm glad we're paying for most of it, because there aren't any strings attached that way.

beatlesgirl25

Amrs, that's awful! I'm sorry.

tlv204

See I won the wedding lottery I think. My dad passed away when I was 11, and left me a trust fund that has money and stock from a family company that is still doing well. I don't have access to the money unless my grandmother OKs it, and she said I could use some trust money to pay for some of the wedding. So I got family money to pay for it but no family input basically.  We still paid for a chunk of it, and ILs gave us some money which we used for a honeymoon.

I guess I know how lucky I am, but I also realize my mom has very little money and I just can't imagine ever asking her to pay for something like that. She helped out in a lot of other ways, but I can't imagine telling someone they didn't give you enough money.

I was just curious I guess, I think the "norm" now is probably a combination of people paying, but I have seen a couple of weddings in the past few years where the bride's parents paid, planned, an hosted the wedding.

NuggetBrain

His parents are paying for the RD and the flowers (his mom insisted because she said she wants me to have really nice flowers).

My mom & grandma gave us 3k towards the reception costs, and my mom is also paying for my dress, alterations, photographer and ceiling decorations (paper lanterns).  She REALLY disliked our first photog (even more than we did) and insisted on paying for a new one.

The honeymoon Noodle is paying for with his bonus.  If he hadn't gotten it this year, we wouldn't be going on a honeymoon.

Everything else we're paying split down the middle for.  But we are really lucky to have such generous families.

tlv204

Pumpkin that's why I said who's footing MOST of the bill.

Amrs that blows

julezlee

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_paidis-paying-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:73845b25-5eea-4719-bda1-a5c5e3237932Post:d1763076-e472-4274-80e6-f52fa02b40cf">Re: Who paid/is paying for your wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Who paid/is paying for your wedding? : Julez - Your mom is awesome. :)
Posted by beatlesgirl25[/QUOTE]

The 4 days I had to go through with my mother staying in our tiny NYC apt when she came up to go shopping with me may/may not have been worth that dress ;)

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

We're planning on paying for everything ourselves.

My mom cries a lot because she really wants to help but claims she can't. I. Don't. Care. I wish she would stop complaining, actually. She says she might reimbuse me for some of my dress (maybe $600), so we'll see. When we got engaged, FI and I did NOT expect either of our families to pay for a party thrown by two adults. (I also knew there was no way in hell my dad would offer anything since he doesn't even give my brother money for college.)

 FMIL claims she'll pay for the traditional "groom's family" stuff - most notably the rehearsal dinner, but she also might give us money for flowers and the officiant (I think?). Again, not counting on the money. I have a contingency plan in case she doesn't follow through with the rehearsal dinner, which involves bowling, beer and pizza on my dime.

aMrsin09

bealtes, tlv - thanks, but I was not suprised when I was told this.  I had actually forgotten about the account, so it isn't like I was counting on it.

mocha beans

We're footing the whole bill ourselves.  We're gonna try and foot some of the travel costs for the wedding party if we can too.