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Wedding Etiquette Forum
mnsears
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HELP.
My mother-in-law to be lovingly and graciously threw me a beautiful bridal shower today. Everything was perfect except for the fact that she invited several (>20) of her close friends who we were not planning to invite to the wedding. We simply can't afford to invite all of them. I don't know what to do or how to even begin to approach this situation!
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Re: HELP.
An e-party is rarely hosted by the MOB or the MOG because that would look totally gift-grabby: "Please come at this date and time and place and bring a great gift for my kid who is getting married."
And the host of an e-party can invite whoever she wants. So your MOG invited friends to an e-party. That's fine, and those people do not expect wedding invitations.
[QUOTE]Well, it's more likely that your FMIL hosted an ENGAGEMENT PARTY for you today. An e-party is rarely hosted by the MOB or the MOG because that would look totally gift-grabby: "Please come at this date and time and place and bring a great gift for my kid who is getting married." And the host of an e-party can invite whoever she wants. So your MOG invited friends to an e-party. That's fine, and those people do not expect wedding invitations.
Posted by Kristin789[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Nope, pretty sure it was a bridal shower because that's what was on the invitation and people brought presents.
</div>
[QUOTE]My Aunt did this too. I told my mom I was horrified, and she said back in their day it was extremely common for friends of the mother of the bride to be invited and come to the shower, knowing and expecting that they would not be invited to the wedding. Doesn't make it right, but apparently it's common in some circles.
Posted by dianemc10[/QUOTE]
<div>That makes me feel a little better! Their circle IS a little different. Thanks! </div>
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[QUOTE]In Response to Re: HELP. : Nope, pretty sure it was a bridal shower because that's what was on the invitation and people brought presents.
Posted by mnsears[/QUOTE]
Ah, don't worry about Kristin#s. She pops up every so often to give "advice" based on traditions in Mayberry, but never sticks around to defend her statements.
[QUOTE]Well, it's more likely that your FMIL hosted an ENGAGEMENT PARTY for you today. An e-party is rarely hosted by the MOB or the MOG because that would look totally gift-grabby: "Please come at this date and time and place and bring a great gift for my kid who is getting married." And the host of an e-party can invite whoever she wants. <strong>So your MOG invited friends to an e-party. That's fine, and those people do not expect wedding invitations.</strong>
Posted by Kristin789[/QUOTE]
I fail to see how you derived e-party from OP's post about a bridal shower, given the info she gave you. What if they did indeed bring gifts and it was intended to be a shower? Your response just sounds snobby.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: HELP. : I fail to see how you derived e-party from OP's post about a bridal shower, given the info she gave you. What if they did indeed bring gifts and it was intended to be a shower? Your response just sounds snobby.
Posted by browneydgrl[/QUOTE]
Kristen#s lives in her own 1950s world and sees what she wants. The brides parents ALWAYS host the wedding and it's up to the parents to handle all aspects of the wedding, etc. She often uses Father of the Bride as a reference when giving advice. I wish she would give correct current advice, but I do find her posts rather entertaining. She rarely ever comments after one appearance in a thread.
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Yes, inviting the extra people was a faux paus, but it was your MILs, not yours. Write extra nice thank you notes, and don't worry about it.
Dresses may be easier to take in than let out, but guest lists are not. -- kate51485