Didn't want to thread jack- Not opening gifts at shower

Knottie_22382494

Given the response on this board and the poll I did today at my office and of my friends most people in attendance will probably feel the same way and will feel slighted that their gifts weren't opened. I would definitely suggest just opening the gifts if you have a say.

Meghannsix

Ugh, I cannot believe I am jumping in on beating the dead horse about whether or not to open gifts at a shower, but I can't help but wonder if OAH is afraid she'll have significantly less gifts than one would expect for a "shower" or "luncheon" or whatever you want to call it, and is embarrassed to call attention to it?  Just a theory to explain this completely irrational thought process.

AJuliaNJ

I'm glad these threads came up. I was considering not opening the gifts. Many of my friends complain about how boring it is to watch people open them so I thought maybe I'd skip. Now, I don't see that as an option. I'll just make sure there is plenty to eat and drink while I'm opening the gifts. Besides, I'm sure they still like the part when people open their gift.

hoffse

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_didnt-want-to-thread-jack-not-opening-gifts-at-shower?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:af1b31b0-cabf-4f7a-9d16-fd7154a0a3a4Post:6a87228c-7576-4611-a446-803540fa00f1">Re: Didn't want to thread jack- Not opening gifts at shower</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Didn't want to thread jack- Not opening gifts at shower : YOU are the one that keeps bringing this up. QUIT TALKING ABOUT IT. Less than 5% agree with you that it's "not rude" and you can do it how you want. There's a Registering and Gifts board where you can probably find some like-minded people in the "I follow Preference" camp. We're in the "Etiquette" camp.
Posted by tarradesign[/QUOTE]

<div>Lord please don't send her over there - then Liatris and I will have to deal with her on our own!  Most the people on R&G are the same regs here, just a smaller number.</div>

Jen4948

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_didnt-want-to-thread-jack-not-opening-gifts-at-shower?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:af1b31b0-cabf-4f7a-9d16-fd7154a0a3a4Post:b0368956-e763-4c44-b644-22f6c4884c90">Re:Didn't want to thread jack Not opening gifts at shower</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Didn't want to thread jack Not opening gifts at shower: You dont always have a choice. My fiances mom has 7 sisters. Was I not supposed to invite all his aunts?
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

You had total control over the guest list.  The only rule was that everyone on it had to be invited to the wedding.  You did not have to invite all his aunts if you didn't want them there.

And if your friends and other guests don't want to see you open gifts, then <em>don't invite them to a shower.</em> And if someone did it on your behalf, then suck it up and open the gifts.
<em>
</em>It's that simple.

meggiemo

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_didnt-want-to-thread-jack-not-opening-gifts-at-shower?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:af1b31b0-cabf-4f7a-9d16-fd7154a0a3a4Post:1a8b69db-b800-45b8-8890-57c4d3b024a2">Re: Didn't want to thread jack- Not opening gifts at shower</a>:
[QUOTE]Also I am apparently in the minority about this and I have gotten attacked for it many times, but I am not opening my gifts at my shower and I am fine with that. If my guests don't like the idea, they do not have to come. With over 80 people, I want to utilize time being spent with them, not opening gifts. It is my personal choice- there's nothing wrong with it.
Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

<div>It appears that I, too, am in the minority. At my shower, hosted by my mom and sister, I greeted guests as they walked in and the bridesmaids received the gifts for me. They then took them, unwrapped them, and set them up on a table with the card displayed in front of each gift. If there was no card, the bridesmaids wrote the gifter's name on a placecard and displayed it in front of each gift. </div><div>
</div><div>My family is large and there were about 50 women at the shower, but I got to spend time chatting with every single person. I was able to greet them, chat with them, and say good-bye without feeling rushed or stressed that I had missed anyone. As the gifts were all opened and displayed before I began chatting, I was able to personally thank each person who had given a gift and express my excitement and/or surprise at what they had chosen. If people were curious as to what I had received, they were welcome to check out the display tables. If they really didn't care, they didn't have to peruse the table and I didn't bore them by opening gifts. My mom and sister received so many compliments on the "display shower" set-up. As a bride, especially one traveling living out of state and away from most family and friends, the time that I was able to spend with my guests was priceless. I wouldn't have had our evening any other way.</div>