We are having an adults only wedding/reception (with the exception of a young brother and sister who are in the wedding party) and my FMIL wants to invite her friends special needs son, who is 8 years old. I'm not quite sure what his condition is called, but his brain stopped maturing years ago and he acts out, loudly and physically, if he wants something and doesn't get it. He is usually a great kid, and we love having him over to our home to visit. If we were having children at our recption I would have absolutly no problem having him there. But we're not, due to budget restraints. In fact we've cut the guest list so much, we hadn't even planned on inviting the mother (the guest list is 99% family now) FMIL has offered to pay the extra amount to include him, but that's not even the point.
I'm a bit upset that she thinks he should get special treatment. I have many close young cousins that have been in my life forever and I feel that it's not okay to invite a child we have only known for a few years and not have our actual family attend. Am I being bridezilla about this? I don't feel like he should be an exception to the children rule because we are simply not that close, but my FMIL loves him and wants him there. FI agrees with me, but doesn't want to hurt his mom's feelings and isn't sure what to say to her. I know you guys will be honest with your opinions... so I need your help!