RSVP vs. Headcount

BizWiz4

Posted on Food board, but then realized the board didn't appear to get much traffic.

Needing to turn in "final headcount" for catering this week.  There are many RSVPs not submitted yet, though most of those I can make a fairly-accurate educated guess on if they will be able to make it.  For a buffet meal, did you turn in exactly what you anticipated? Or slighly higher to accommodate those who may show up but did not RSVP?

There are so many variables (small children who won't be eating, people who don't come at the last minute, etc), I'd be interested to hear what you all did and how it worked out.  I'd hate to run out- but don't want to grossly over pay, either!

TIA!

erinlin25

ask your venue/caterer to be sure, but usually they want an actual head count as to who to expect and then they usually make more just in case.  Can vary from caterer to caterer though

BizWiz4

I have called my friends/family.  There is a bit of resistance to contact "other" guests, fearful of appearing pushy (but NOT fearful that FI and I will overpay... GRRRR). 

I've heard to say count children as 1/2, etc, for more accurate count.

aurianna

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_rsvp-vs-headcount?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d4edf25b-85e9-401f-a6ab-137c9fbb7389Post:ebd8cb35-15e9-4700-b759-916d6846c074">Re: RSVP vs. Headcount</a>:
[QUOTE]I have called my friends/family.  There is a bit of resistance to contact "other" guests, fearful of appearing pushy (but NOT fearful that FI and I will overpay... GRRRR).  I've heard to say count children as 1/2, etc, for more accurate count.
Posted by BizWiz4[/QUOTE]

Tell your caterer how many adults and how many children and let them decide on food amounts.

Is it <em>after </em>the RSVP date? If it's after the RSVP date (assuming it's not insanely early and more than a month before the wedding) and close to final headcount deadline, you need to be pushy. Call them.
If you're still a ways off from your headcount date, just wait a while longer. And then call them.

AddieCake

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_rsvp-vs-headcount?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:d4edf25b-85e9-401f-a6ab-137c9fbb7389Post:e012c237-ed77-41a8-9708-4337bb012496">Re: RSVP vs. Headcount</a>:
[QUOTE]I called people who didn't RSVP so I had a hard number.  I suggest you do the same to avoid either over-paying or not having enough food.
Posted by KindaSparkly[/QUOTE]


This. You need to call and get hard numbers. Guesstimating is not safe!

MoonlightSilver

People are people, you don't count half people. If you're after the RSVP date, you need to call your guests and ask for a yes or no. We had buffet food and we gave our caterer exact numbers (X adults, y children, z vendors).

misssunshine17

Don't let other people waste your money. It's not pushy. Make the calls.

aurianna

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_rsvp-vs-headcount?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d4edf25b-85e9-401f-a6ab-137c9fbb7389Post:70f0579b-34e9-4fe6-954a-0e6db0d3a63d">Re: RSVP vs. Headcount</a>:
[QUOTE]Start callling.  Ask your mom and FMIL if they could help by calling their relatives, etc. 
Posted by NYUgirl100[/QUOTE]

Disagree. It's her wedding. If she and FI are adult enough to get married, they are adult enough to call their wedding guests.

AmandaKess

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_rsvp-vs-headcount?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d4edf25b-85e9-401f-a6ab-137c9fbb7389Post:2623c577-f694-4351-9863-e293ac8c8c0b">Re: RSVP vs. Headcount</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: RSVP vs. Headcount : No, whoever is telling you that is ridiculous; you just have to call them.  It's not pushy of you to want a response, it's rude of them not to respond in a timely fashion.  Let the caterer know "84 adults, 12 kids" or whatever, and they plan accordingly.
Posted by KindaSparkly[/QUOTE]

I agree. I feel like people rarely understand or remember how expensive and stressful wedding planning is. It's not at all pushy for you to expect an answer from someone you invited to your wedding.

Jen4948

You need to call.  Don't guess.  You have every right and need to know if someone is coming and it is not "pushy" to ask them when they don't let you know.  They're the ones being rude by not giving you a timely response.

[Deleted User]

Contact guests to confirm. I had one guest who thought she mailed in RSVP but didn't. For head count I agree with others. You need to give actual head count & tell them how many adults & how many kids that are 12 & under (my reception hall counted anyone over 12 as an adult) You may be able to save a few bucks because many places charge less for kids since they know the kids won't eat as much.

Raeneera

I would DEF call the non-RSVPers, and if they get snippy just respond with "Hey Im making sure we'll have enough food & booze for everyone! I dont want to leave you out."