Wedding Etiquette Forum
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Save the Dates

I have googled and googled what is proper and still, I have no idea how to address my save the dates.

My wedding is going to be more formal, but not black tie. We don't have a set them per say, but it is more of a rustic nature vibe. My save the dates are a birch tree on a magnet. How should I address them?!

 I have mostly married couples..
 Mr. and Mrs.Smith

Married Couples with Children over 18 at home
Mr and Mrs Smith
Mr. Christopher Smith.. or just Christopher?

Married Couples with Children under 18
Mr and Mrs Smith
Jennifer and Christoper Smith or should I do Miss and Mr.?

Also, should I use nickmames and shortened names? Like Becky for Rebecca?

ANDD for my invitations I figure I would use
Mr and Mrs John smith for the married couples

then again for the children I don't know if I should add the Miss and Mr. or just names.

Another question

What If I am inviting a person over 18 living at home but not the family?
Would I address that as
Mr. (friends name) Smith

Or just Mr. Smith and hope the parents see the return label and give the mail to their child?

HELP!

Thank you!

Re: Save the Dates

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    Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited January 2013
    For STDs they can be a bit less formal then the invites.  For the married couples you are correct.  But for anyone that has an adult child living at home they should really get their own STD and invite.  For kids under 18 just list their first names, no Miss or Mr is necessary.

    For invites every anyone who is an adult should receive their own invite.  So even if the 18 year old still lives with Mom and Dad he is an adult and should have a separate invite.

    For all invites you should really list first names of the individuals, unless of course they are married and then you would only be listing the husbands first name.

    Edit:  Oh and as for nicknames and such, I think that really depends on the individual and what they prefer to be called but formal is always a safer bet.

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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_save-the-dates-12?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:d5158638-f233-4bcd-b247-9f71db2d28f0Post:0b8bd666-a6a0-4b4c-a35c-6517798c05cc">Save the Dates</a>:
    [QUOTE]I have googled and googled what is proper and still, I have no idea how to address my save the dates. My wedding is going to be more formal, but not black tie. We don't have a set them per say, but it is more of a rustic nature vibe. My save the dates are a birch tree on a magnet. How should I address them?!  I have mostly married couples..  Mr. and Mrs.Smith Married Couples with Children over 18 at home Mr and Mrs Smith Mr. Christopher Smith.. or just Christopher? Married Couples with Children under 18 Mr and Mrs Smith Jennifer and Christoper Smith or should I do Miss and Mr.? Also, should I use nickmames and shortened names? Like Becky for Rebecca? ANDD for my invitations I figure I would use Mr and Mrs John smith for the married couples then again for the children I don't know if I should add the Miss and Mr. or just names. Another question <strong>What If I am inviting a person over 18 living at home but not the family? Would I address that as Mr. (friends name) Smith Or just Mr. Smith and hope the parents see the return label and give the mail to their child?</strong> HELP! Thank you!
    Posted by burtonangel146[/QUOTE]

    For everything else, Maggie did a good job. For the bolded, I would address it to your friend, "Mr. John Smith", so that way Dad doesn't see it and open(or a brother). I know when I lived at home, my mom wouldn't look at the return label and if she did, very rarely would she know Sally Jones was my friend. If the return address was to my friend's parents or her/his FI's parents, she wouldn't have known them.
    You never lose by loving. You always lose by holding back. - Barbara DeAngelis
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    I personally found the below website to have some very good etiquette rules.

    http://www.artisticaddressing.com/Etiquette.htm

    A lot depends on the formality and you're invitee's preferences.

    Examples -  I personally liked including titles for everyone (including the kids).  I also liked writing out the name of the state (some people will tell you this isn't necessary and the USPO prefers state abbreviations).

    I addressed mine to married couples as Mr. & Mrs. John Doe.  One of my invitees was offended by this because her first name wasn't on it.

    I personally sent 1 invite/household.  This isn't correct etiquette as the above and 99% of the people on the boards will tell you.  However, the people I sent it to wouldn't care & I would have literally doubled the amount of invitations I would have had to order if I did this.

    PS - if you are doing escort cards, I used what they normally go by (Steve instead of Steven).
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