How have you stupidly hurt yourself?

opalsky007

Age 4: While getting chased by a neighbor kid, tripped over a tree root. Bit my tongue nearly in half.

Age 8: Was standing on top of the monkey bars at school. Got startled, slipped and fell straddling the bar. Fractured pelvis--I still have a dime-sized hole in the bone.

Age 15: Failed miserably at catching a 20-foot tall aluminum beam that someone was trying to set on my shoulder. Separated shoulder + nerve damage.

Age 23: Went jogging with H. Made it a whole 1/4 mile before stepping in a hole and shredding my MCL. I was too stubborn to go to the doctor for the next eight weeks, and wound up with a secondary meniscus injury.

btrflykate1230

I rode my bike down the stairs when I was 5. I ended up with a BADLY scratched up face and still have small scars to this day.

My 8-year-old, 70 lb self also wanted to walk the 100 lb dog one afternoon. Instead, he took me for a walk. It was like kneeboarding down the rock driveway without a board and water. I ended up with 15 stitches.

I think that's it though!

Kati0105

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_stupidly-hurt-yourself?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ef4dd65d-f544-4e4d-af22-fd5f7a40a38cPost:68572f83-953c-421b-85be-7017c65060c2">Re: How have you stupidly hurt yourself?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: How have you stupidly hurt yourself? : I'm just imagining the doctor's raised eyebrows, "And how did you sustain THIS injury, ma'am?" I think chipping your tailbone while wearing a gorilla mask would just be one of the most humiliating things in the world.
Posted by baystateapple[/QUOTE]

Yeah the docs definitely interrogated poor DH.  And my brother stared at me on the ground in the gorilla mask (where did I even get that?) gasping in pain for a full minute or two before I was like "go get Mom, jerk!"

bel138

I broke my index finger riding a bike...three times.

katiewhompus

When I was in college my ex got hit over the head with a frying pan, resulting in 9 staples to hold his scalp together at the ER. The officer investigating (he pressed charges against the guy that did it) definitely thought I did it. When we told him the story he went "wow, normally its the female who chooses the frying pan as a weapon, never heard of a guy stooping to that level before."

nhelene

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_stupidly-hurt-yourself?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:ef4dd65d-f544-4e4d-af22-fd5f7a40a38cPost:3e5f18ad-5d75-422a-8e59-f0364a89bf3b">Re: How have you stupidly hurt yourself?</a>:
[QUOTE]When I was in college my ex got hit over the head with a frying pan, resulting in 9 staples to hold his scalp together at the ER.
Posted by katiewhompus[/QUOTE]

I probably would not have ended up with my FI if my MOH had not been riding a horse and clotheslined herself on a tree.  I drove her to the hospital, FI drove there to pick her up, and we hung out in the waiting room all night.

ETA: that's related to your story because she also had head staples.  forgive the random train of thought

picoult81

I had REALLY noisy neighbors that lived below me, and I wanted to get back at them.  I stood on the back of my couch and jumped down as hard as I could to create a loud "thump".  A few times into this I over-jumped and cracked my wrist on my tv stand.  It started swelling up and turning purple within seconds so I went to the ER.  Turns out it wasn't broken, but severely sprained.  And no, I did not tell them how it really happened.



While working at PetsMart I was talking to the forklift driver and neither of us was paying attention.  She dropped a full pallet of cat litter and food on my foot.  Instead of waiting for her to lift it, I tried to pull my foot loose.  Broke my ankle and tore several ligaments.

jasmineh7777

Black eye from my dog. I was wrapping Christmas gifts, and Jessie wanted to play. She knocked me in the eye with her big boney head, and almost knocked me unconscious.

ThePinkSuperhero

I put my hand on a burner I had just finished cooking on to see if it was still hot.  It was!

karbar42

I was putting together Target furniture and I got one of the screws stuck and I tried removing it with a hammer, pulling with the fork side, when it finally let loose, I hit myself in the face so hard with the butt of the hammer that I knocked myself out. I had to go get xrays, but it was only badly bruised.  I had a massive shiner, which was fun to explain at the DV shelter I was working "ummm I hit myself in the face with a hammer, no really..."

katiewhompus

Damn PetSmart forklifts...that's where Dh was working when he knocked out his teeth. I also walked into one of those forklifts, yes, walked into it, luckily the back part of it, right in front of my District Manager. I had worked 14 hour days for 18 days straight and while my brain said "move one foot to the left" my feet kept going and SMACK. He looked at me, started laughing, then ordered me to go home and get some rest.

picoult81

What made it worse is that while I was sitting on the ground over in the cat area, waiting for the manager to get his things together so he could take me to the ER, a customer walked up to me and started asking me questions about the litter.  I was sitting on the ground holding my broken foot, crying, while the forklift driver was pacing around in a panic saying "OMG, OMG" over and over.  You think she would have realized we were busy at the moment.

katiewhompus

Pfft, customer always comes first, you should know that :P
PetSmart gets some obnoxious ones too. I had to go into work the day one of my pets died so I kept going to the back rooms because I would start randomly crying. As I was running back there, tears streaming down my face, a customer goes "Oh miss can you help me?". I just choked out, "Does it look like I can help you?" and then hid for the next 10 minutes.

sarabear23

I broke my thumb in 3 places by crashing a golf cart into a small fence. So dumb.
I also sprained my foot playing in the snow in JANUARY and it still is killing me.

puokgirl

Age 2: running with my tongue between my teeth.  I tripped and fell - almost bit my tongue off.  It was hanging on by 1/4" on each side.

1st grade: falling out of a tree and sliding between said tree and the fence it was next to.  Scrapes down the front, splinters down the back.

3rd grade: stabbed with a butter knife.  I kicked my brother out of the tent, and he came at me with a butter knife because he wasn't allowed to touch bigger knives.  Mom didn't want to explain a knife wound on a child to the ER so she held the two sides of the wound together with a bandaid pulled tightly.

6th grade: playing tetherball. I missed the ball and hit the pole. I can now bend my finger in strange ways.

7th grade: dissecting a frog.  I wanted to see its brain so I was sawing away at its skull.  The scalpel stuck in the skull so I forced it out of the skull and right into that spot between my thumb and index finger.  The teacher didn't want to explain a scalpel wound to the principal, so he wouldn't let me leave to seek medical attention. 

8th grade: not catching a baseball.  During baseball warmups my friend threw a pop-fly.  I held my glove up to catch it and the ball hit me right in the nose.  Broken nose, black eyes.  Then I re-broke it sneezing 3 days later.

8th grade: playing volleyball.  I bumped the ball and dislocated my wrist.  I popped it right back in and then went to the ER.

9th grade: playing volleyball again. I fell and landed with my hand flat. Broke my left wrist.

12th grade: shaking a snapple bottle.  I sprained my wrist.

Age 20: fell out of bed. Broke my right wrist.  Had to learn how to write left handed.

February: decided cute shoes were more important than being able to walk.  I wore them in Vegas. FI didn't want a taxi so I walked 3 miles in cute shoes.  Blisters and blood.  Then I sat in a hot tub and 2 blisters popped - OWWWW

There are a ton more, but those are the highlights.

missmaryesq

I tripped and fell 4 weeks ago, breaking a bone in my foot -- and my wedding is 8 weeks away!!!  Now that's STUPIDITY!!!!!!!!!

mica178

1st grade: stood on tiptoes to look out a window in my house, slipped, and knocked out one of my front teeth.  The next morning, pulled the same stunt and knocked out my other front tooth. 

It was over a year before my adult front teeth grew in.  My father (of the dorky humor) called me bucktooth for that whole time.

AmoroAgain

Do we need like, major injuries or are bruises ok?  I've twice run into our balcony door today, and now have a giant bruise on that arm.  Yesterday, I dropped something on the side of my foot, and now have a giant bruise.  I really could go on and on with this.

alixzafiris

Age 3: The elder of my two younger brothers was born and dad and I went to see him and my mum in hospital.  I was carrying a present for him in a nice pretty wrapped box, tripped and started to fall on my face. I lifted my arms above my head as I fell so I wouldn't hurt the present and fell on my face, permanently knocking my jaw out of alignment. Now I've got pretty bad TMJ in my left joint.

Age 6: Went to a bird sanctuary with my mom (who was heavily pregnant with my other brother) and my grandma. A blue crane (South Africa's big scary national bird) was in a bad mood and started harrassing us. My mum, being all "my baaaaaybeeeee" ran off leaving Gram and I to fend for ourselves. The bird was taller than both of us. It started pecking like mad and Gram finally beat the fuucker off with her handbag. Ah, Africa...

Age 10: We had a retaining wall in our back garden that separated a land grade from the house to the garage building (this is in SA). We had a braai (barbecue) built into the retaining wall and we used to climb up it and over the wall - it had rebar poles set into the brick to rest a grilling rack on when cooking. I slipped on the way up and firmly lodged a half inch piece of rusted rebar into my right femur. Lovely.

AmoroAgain

OHWAIT!!  Best story ever.

When I was in high school, I was active in 4H, and I raised sheep.  Every year at the fair, we would have to show them, and then take them out for auction.  The last year I did this, I was helping one of my younger sisters friends with her sheep, which happened to be the heaviest one's in the barn (about 140lbs).  While we were waiting in line to go up for the auction, the one I wasn't holding freaked out, and backed, full tilt, into my knee.  POP!  Down I went.  My mom took me to the ER.  Can you imagine the nurses and doctors?  "I'm sorry, how did this happen again?"  "A sheep ran into me."

Yeaaahhh... I was on crutches for a week.

allisong23

Last fall I was opening a can of cat food for the kitties. I did it quickly and didn't pay attention and ripped open between my index finger and thumb. I knew immediately that it was bad and called out for FI and grabbed some paper towels. When he arrived, I had my hand wrapped in towels, but it had already bled through. FI took one look at me and turned WHITE. What I didn't realize was that I nicked an artery and there was blood everywhere. On my face, on the counter, on the cabinets (FI is 6;4", and the spurt was above his head). Turns out that when you see someone get cut in a cartoon and blood spurts out really happens when you hit an artery.

He said "You need to sit down. We need to get you to the hospital. I need to sit down too". He then proceeded to faint on the love seat. I was still calm, but I unwrapped my hand and saw it was worse than I thought. I told FI that he was right, we did need to go to the ER. That was when I found him passed out.

Eventually I got him up and we went to the ER where I had 9 stitches put in. When we got home, the kitchen loked like a crime scene. I told people if I disappear and they need a DNA sample, just check out my kitchen.

smokeybailey

I chipped my tooth diving off a bridge into a swimming pool.  I may or may not have been drunk.

I had to get stitches in my eye after fielding grounders.  However, we were using hard pinecones instead of balls.  The pinecone took a bad hop and that was all she wrote.

Punctured the back of my mouth with a toothbrush.  I had my sonic care in my mouth and turned a corner to walk back to the bathroom, but I cut it too close and the toothbrush went through the upper back part of my mouth. 

shortee426

In Sophomore year of High School I sprained my ankle getting out of my sister's car.

A few months ago I fell off the bike while spinning.  Yes...the STATIONARY spin bike. I didn't break/sprain anything, but I did put a huge gash in my thigh that will forever be scarred (amongst other scrapes/bruises).