Too old for a big wedding?

neilly18

Most heavier people don't feel comfortbale in strapless dresses regardless of their age -- unfortunately many brides don't take this into consideration

leah2b

I am going to a fabulous, top notch wedding (Bonnet Island, LBI) in a few weeks for a couple that is in their 50s and 60s.  I am sure it will be a fabulous affair and they deserve to celebrate their happiness in style.  As the are paying for the wedding themselves and are financially settled, they simply asked for the gift of presence.  I will bring a unique and hopefully special gift anyways but it's not required.THere has been no engagement parties, boring showers, bachelorette stuff - just a great wedding.  In my opinion, thats just perfect.I think sometimes many "older" couples don't want to deal with the drama and hoopla of a huge wedding affairs.  In the end, do what you want. 

kewltif

Very true Neilly!

DMLJ

Phyllis- your BM did not look old at all. And to the person who said they "cringe" when they see 20 somethings getting married, please don't. My 20s are important to me too but maybe for different reasons.... and I know that marriage is no joke. I will be 24 when we get married and I'm probably more ready for this than most people older than me. Also, i think it depends on where you are in life when you get married- if its the first marriage and there are no children then why not "do it up". I would think it was a little weird if someone was wearing a big white dress at their 2nd wedding and expected a bridal shower (its kind like, been there, done that?) But to each their own.

Phyllisbride

Thanks Diane. I thought they all looked great

Lori&Peter

I got married 12 days after my 42nd birthday. When we first talked about the wedding thing we originally talked about keeping it small. But when we started making out the list I started feeling like there were people I was leaving out that I really wanted to be there. At the time my now husband was more concerned with "saving money". He was married before and had a somewhat small wedding. I was never married. We ended up with a guest list of 140 and total guests 109. My bridal party was my sister in law who is 28, my best friend who is 32, and my step daughter who is 17. My dress was an A line with a chapel train. We had a great celebration and my husband had a blast. It was the best decision we made to have a larger wedding with all our friends and relatives. 15 days after the wedding my husband was diagnosed with an aggressive salivary gland cancer in his nasal cavity. He had a major surgery to remove the tumor on our 1 month anniversary and since then he has been undergoing extensive aggressive radiation and chemotherpy with an unknown prognosis. I will never ever regret having a large wedding and being able to share our day with all our close friends and family and my video is my most treasured possession as it was one of the last days my husband truly felt good and was not in pain.

kewltif

Lori- I'm really sorry. I can't even believe how much you have been through in the past few months, and it definitely puts things in perspective. Phyllis- your girls (and you especially!) did look great! Idk, I guess I don't group you in the "old bride crowd." My view stems more from someone who looks like my mother than my cohort.

danafromslope

I am 40 and I think its fine to pull out all the stops for a grand, elegant party celebrating my first (and hopefully only) marriage. I get so annoyed with those folks that tell me that I should do things simply and quietly, or that they have already been to a dozen other weddings and mine is inconvenient cause they thought they were done with friends getting married. I spent my 20's getting educated and building a career and I spent my 30's with my now fiance refining our lives and getting to do things I probably wouldn't have been able to do---3 months in Ausstralia working, tons of travel, etc. Why should I deny myself an experience, a rite of passage because I waited a little longer than everyone else? So older ladies (and 40 isn't old, btw) go out and celebrate. Shout from the rafters that you have found a great love and happiness in your life. Just don't be a sloppy drunk on your wedding day

neilly18

The Sloppy Drunk should go for all ages. Enjoy and remember your night -- save the drinkiness for the after party or HM Seems like the common theme for me on this thread is if you shouldn't do it if you are an older bride you sholdn;t do it as a younger bride!.  Maybe its the experience that comes with age ;-)

BwayDani

You should do whatever the hell you want, at ANY age.  If people don't like it, they can go F themselves, right?  40 is no longer considered "old" these days anyway.  Any feelings of being "too old" for this or that are all in her head, and it's sad that she looks at herself in that way.  Life is too short!!!

JeannineG122

What Dana said.