Extremely Upset

The Farmers Daughter

So I was going to be sending invites out this weekend. About 6 weeks in advance. With a November wedding I'm thinking this isn't a problem as I have sent save the dates and pretty much knew who is attending. Today FI has some big news. He has been offered a promotion (sooner than expected) with a nice increase in salary. Re-location would be mandatory. Where we would be moving we could still live in the country and he can commute to the city for work each day. Here is where the problem comes in. They want him to move immediately and he would have to give up plans to be off work in November because of the project he would be working on which means postponing our wedding plans which is just over 6 weeks away. We knew the mandatory re-location would probably happen so I was prepared to go. But this is totally unexpected. If he turns it down it may be a career killer. Truth is I am in tears and beyond words for how I feel. A decision has to be made and quickly.

gailpete

Congratulations on his promotion but sorry to hear it is putting a crimp in your wedding plans.How far away is the move ?  When you say  he would have to give up plans to be off, will he have to work Saturdays or were you planning a longer period of time for prep and honeymoon?  If the distance is doable and he can have Friday night and Saturday off, you should still be able to pull the wedding off.  It would mean a lot more would fall on your shoulders, but at least you'd be married.Good luck and I hope things work out.

kmmssg

I'm with gailpete on this one.  Can he at least negotiate Friday and Saturday off?

T&A430

It's a little crappy that you sent out save the dates and may have to change it, but the people you've invited are your friends and family so they should understand completely why a change was necessary if you go that route. Aside from that, if he can compromise and take 1 day off versus 5-6 or more then you could still have your wedding and just postpone your honeymoon. I too agree with PP that you could still pull it off if the wedding is on a Saturday, just be ready to work for it. Your wedding is a huge part of your life, but his career (especially in such an unstable economy) is very important to your life as well. I personally would not risk turning something like this down; you can always get married later but he may never get this opportunity again. I'm sorry things have turned out like this. **hugs**

phill369

Sorry for such good but bad news! I agree with previous posters that it seems like he could get the time for the rehearsal and wedding off atleast. Either way, things will work themselves out!

sweetypael

Hi Vic, I am so sorry I wasn't there when you tried to call before and I am so feeling your frustration. So weird you know? But I know you and I'm sure you have already made the right decision but something you said to me once really applies for you now. I'll never forget it. You said, My wedding day is important and I want it to be a great day and a day I will cherish the memory of but it's just one day. By no means do I want it to be the best day I ever have with this man because I'm spending the rest of my life with him. There has to be more days that will be even better. Getting married is what's most important but the big wedding with all the trimmings is just fluff to make it fun. But I am enjoying all the fluff. So you have to move the fluff around. It will work out the way it should in the end.

The Farmers Daughter

Thank you for that Pael. It was so nice to be able to talk again.

MeganH2010

I too work in a job where relocation is necessary and something that heppens fairly often. I completely agree with the other posters that he should try to negotiate the Friday and Saturday off (or whatever the wedding days are) to accomodate the wedding. If you have to postpone the honeymoon that's not too bad, since a lot of couples do that to save money, go at a different time of year ect. As a bride I also know that this day takes lots of planning and preperation that to just call it off for a promotion could be horrible for your finances (non-refundable deposits and such). He should try to work it out with his company...they had to know he was getting married right? GL! and congrats and the new promotion and upcoming wedding!