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July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!

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Re: July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!

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    KatieK501KatieK501 member
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_july-12-brides-invasion-our-advice-to-july-13-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:a215cf8b-e67d-45f6-b917-c0029818bde0Post:24a907e3-d450-42fe-93d2-97eb87f1fdc9">Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Ok I thought of some questions. For those of you that had a Catholic ceremony did you invite the priest to your reception word of mouth or with an invite? Did he attend your RD and or reception, say a prayer, etc? Also, did you donate any additional dollars outside of the required cost? My other question is to everyone. Were there any unexpected costs you came across?
    Posted by Getting2Vowels[/QUOTE]

    I'm not Catholic, but I'm going to answer anyway :-)  We're Lutheran and had our wedding at the Lutheran church, reception somewhere else.  We hand delievered an invitation to our pastor at one of our pre-marital counseling sessions.  We also invited him to the RD (in-laws sent invitations) and to the reception.  FIL prayed at the RD, not pastor; I don't think we did anything at the reception.  Whoops.

    We did not donate anything other than required (we are members there and tithe there).  There was no listed fee for the people we asked to sing and play guitar, so I just gave them something in comparison on the required list. 

    I don't think I had any unexpected costs, but even though they were planned, they sort of stacked up at the end.  I went to the bank the morning of the wedding to get cash to pay everyone and couldn't use the ATM b/c of the amount I had to withdraw (and I've been out of checks for a while, not wanting to reorder since we're canceling my bank account and joining on his).  Don't put that off until last minute.  I was at the church writing thank you's after our pre-wedding pictures so the wedding coordinator could deliver them after the wedding.
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    Nati05Nati05 member
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_july-12-brides-invasion-our-advice-to-july-13-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:a215cf8b-e67d-45f6-b917-c0029818bde0Post:24a907e3-d450-42fe-93d2-97eb87f1fdc9">Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Ok I thought of some questions. For those of you that had a Catholic ceremony did you invite the priest to your reception word of mouth or with an invite? Did he attend your RD and or reception, say a prayer, etc? Also, did you donate any additional dollars outside of the required cost? My other question is to everyone. Were there any unexpected costs you came across?
    Posted by Getting2Vowels[/QUOTE]

    I didn't have a Catholic ceremony but I'm 99.9% positive all of us gave a formal invitation to the officiant as it's said to be proper etiquette.

    Our pastor did not stay past the ceremony. It ended, he hugged us and gave us well wishes outside and was on his way. Don't know about the other girls however..
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    bridetobe71412bridetobe71412
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_july-12-brides-invasion-our-advice-to-july-13-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:a215cf8b-e67d-45f6-b917-c0029818bde0Post:24a907e3-d450-42fe-93d2-97eb87f1fdc9">Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Ok I thought of some questions. For those of you that had a Catholic ceremony did you invite the priest to your reception word of mouth or with an invite? Did he attend your RD and or reception, say a prayer, etc? Also, did you donate any additional dollars outside of the required cost? My other question is to everyone. Were there any unexpected costs you came across?
    Posted by Getting2Vowels[/QUOTE]

    1) We had a Catholic ceremony and yes, we invited our priest to both. My ILs sent a formal invitation to the RD (they hosted) and my mom sent a formal invitation to the reception (she hosted). In general, they won't come, but it's supposed to be the right thing to do to invite them formally. I remember one knottie saying her priest was insulted that he received an invitation (???) but that's literally the only time I've ever heard of a priest being surprised/upset by it.

    2) We had to pay the church an exorbitant (4 figure) amount of money to have the wedding at the church. It was not our home parish, so we additionally had to dole out money to our officiant's church (who is actually my old family priest, not associated with the church at which we had the ceremony) and to our current home parish in NYC (who filled out our forms and set us up with Pre Cana). We also had to pay for Pre Cana. Catholic churches love their money.

    3) Some unexpected costs? Hmm. I mean, everything was an "add-on" at our reception venue since not one thing was included, so everything was kind of "unexpected." I'd say, makeup and hair ended up costing me moer than I expected to pay because I ended up covering hair/makep for all 12 girls/moms/grandma. That was definitely not a cost I should have assumed. Also, "upgrades" for different packages that vendors spring on you the week or two before your wedding. Other than that, it was all expectedly exorbitant for one day :)

    MORE QUESTIONS PLEASE.
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    Getting2VowelsGetting2Vowels member
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    MORE QUESTIONS PLEASE. Posted by bridetobe71412[/QUOTE] This made me lol. Who wants to design my wedding program template? I used to be good at creating and editing images but for some reason I cant get anything to align or look right. We both want booklet programs and cant figure out the layout for printing back, front and the image just looks sloppy and faded. Ugh. Anyone up for it? Lol
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    honeybear072012honeybear072012
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_july-12-brides-invasion-our-advice-to-july-13-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:a215cf8b-e67d-45f6-b917-c0029818bde0Post:47ad4a51-a923-4ec7-be92-3a89f557b10d">Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides! : 1) We had a Catholic ceremony and yes, we invited our priest to both. My ILs sent a formal invitation to the RD (they hosted) and my mom sent a formal invitation to the reception (she hosted). In general, they won't come, but it's supposed to be the right thing to do to invite them formally. I remember one knottie saying her priest was insulted that he received an invitation (???) but that's literally the only time I've ever heard of a priest being surprised/upset by it.
    Posted by bridetobe71412[/QUOTE]


    That was me!  Sorry, I was MIA all afternoon!  He said that since they know the ceremony is going on it's not proper to send an invite to the ceremony and they should be only invited to the reception.  Obviously a lot of the other knotties haven't heard this so maybe it's just in my area?

    To anwer other questions, we invited him to the RD by verbal invite and he came to that but he was not able to come to the reception after the wedding.  He does masses for two parishes and the other parish's festival was that weekend as well so he couldn't come.  To my knowledge he has never come to a reception since they gave him the second parish and took away the second priest.  But you should send an invite to the reception, especially if you need to know what he would like to eat!

    He said a prayer at the RD, my dad did the prayer at the reception.

    My parents are super involved in our parish but they did not donate more to the parish other than what is 'required.'

    I can't think of any unexpected costs.  My dress cost more to alter than planned (it was way big, the bridal shop screwed up measuring me apparently but wouldn't admit it).  That's about the only thing I can think of.
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    bridetobe71412bridetobe71412
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_july-12-brides-invasion-our-advice-to-july-13-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:a215cf8b-e67d-45f6-b917-c0029818bde0Post:bf3b565c-c9b2-48ee-bb0f-f09bb61708a3">Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!</a>:
    [QUOTE]MORE QUESTIONS PLEASE. Posted by bridetobe71412[/QUOTE] This made me lol. <strong>Who wants to design my wedding program template?</strong> I used to be good at creating and editing images but for some reason I cant get anything to align or look right. We both want booklet programs and cant figure out the layout for printing back, front and the image just looks sloppy and faded. Ugh. Anyone up for it? Lol
    Posted by Getting2Vowels[/QUOTE]

    HA. Don't even bother thinking about it yet. You'll need to know alllllllll of your readings, readers, songs, etc. before doing so. Unless you already know. In which case, you are way ahead of the game! I didn't have mine squared away until two weeks before the wedding.

    I honestly just made mine in Word and messed around with printing and moving the text so it would print out correctly.  It was relatively easy to do, but just took a bit of time to figure out. It's not the most insanely awesome one ever, but it did its job and I didn't have to do it until the week or so before the wedding. If you'd ilke to see some templates, there are usually some on the Catholic Weddings board, as well as a few of the other boards. (Mine wouldn't be worth it to send!)
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    Getting2VowelsGetting2Vowels member
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    edited August 2012
    Excuse my lack of manners! Thank you for your answers! Id post a dozen smiley faces but TK hates my mobile. So lets just pretend theres one here smiley Edit: yep, all my readings, music etc are most definitely picked out. Im a bit anal and wwaaaaaaaaayy ahead of schedule.
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    Nati05Nati05 member
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_july-12-brides-invasion-our-advice-to-july-13-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:a215cf8b-e67d-45f6-b917-c0029818bde0Post:8b56aa60-9f3a-4654-bfbd-d1529c1b1bcb">Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Excuse my lack of manners! Thank you for your answers! Id post a dozen smiley faces but TK hates my mobile. So lets just pretend theres one here smiley Edit: yep, all my readings, music etc are most definitely picked out. Im a bit anal and wwaaaaaaaaayy ahead of schedule.
    Posted by Getting2Vowels[/QUOTE]

    Bahaha! Don't you hate that about TK mobile?? I don't know what their deal is but it drives me nuts!
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    bridetobe71412bridetobe71412
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    Also, forgot to say: My FIL did the blessing at the reception since the priest wasn't there. We didn't really have a blessing at the RD but my MIL welcomed everyone. :)
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    bridetobe71412bridetobe71412
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_july-12-brides-invasion-our-advice-to-july-13-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:a215cf8b-e67d-45f6-b917-c0029818bde0Post:8b56aa60-9f3a-4654-bfbd-d1529c1b1bcb">Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Excuse my lack of manners! Thank you for your answers! Id post a dozen smiley faces but TK hates my mobile. So lets just pretend theres one here smiley <strong>Edit: yep, all my readings, music etc are most definitely picked out. Im a bit anal and wwaaaaaaaaayy ahead of schedule.
    </strong>Posted by Getting2Vowels[/QUOTE]

    I am seriously impressed! In that case, I'd head over to the Catholic Weddings board and check out the sticky at the top. I think they have a few templates in there. I'd consider holding off though because you may decide (since you have so much time) you'd like to do something a little different and will be mad you already spent the time/money making something when you find something better! I'm just thinking of the fan programs some of our ladies did - they are super cute and I would have done something like that if I had had the time and DIY prowess :)
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    Getting2VowelsGetting2Vowels member
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    In Response to Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!:Excuse my lack of manners! Thank you for your answers! Id post a dozen smiley faces but TK hates my mobile. So lets just pretend theres one here smiley Edit: yep, all my readings, music etc are most definitely picked out. Im a bit anal and wwaaaaaaaaayy ahead of schedule.Posted by Getting2VowelsI am seriously impressed! In that case, I'd head over to the Catholic Weddings board and check out the sticky at the top. I think they have a few templates in there. I'd consider holding off though because you may decide since you have so much time you'd like to do something a little different and will be mad you already spent the time/money making something when you find something better! I'm just thinking of the fan programs some of our ladies did they are super cute and I would have done something like that if I had had the time and DIY prowess : Posted by bridetobe71412[/QUOTE]

    I should have mentioned I have a template, 2 in fact, but when I started inputting all the names and changing verses, etc all the wording and page numbers changed. Then when I thought i had it figured out my printer decided to take a dump and didn't print on what I thought was the coordinated back page. I got so frustrated that I haven't looked at it for a while. Im half tempted to just pick someone on Etsy to do all the work. Its a shame though, I do want to diy these in the worst way! Maybe I'll give it some time like you said...
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    honeybear072012honeybear072012
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_july-12-brides-invasion-our-advice-to-july-13-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:a215cf8b-e67d-45f6-b917-c0029818bde0Post:098a42ad-bd79-43f6-ad37-a9e6b2552df3">Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides! : I am seriously impressed! In that case, I'd head over to the Catholic Weddings board and check out the sticky at the top. I think they have a few templates in there. I'd consider holding off though because you may decide (since you have so much time) you'd like to do something a little different and will be mad you already spent the time/money making something when you find something better! I'm just thinking of the fan programs some of our ladies did - they are super cute and I would have done something like that if I had had the time and DIY prowess :)
    Posted by bridetobe71412[/QUOTE]

    I totally agree with holding off!  That's great you have everything done already!  That was our big hold up!

    Another thing you might want to do, chek with your priest before you print anything!  Mine had to OK ours and he didn't tell us till we met one on one with him a month before the wedding.  We hadn't done anything but don't get too carried away!

    And one last thing about programs, most of the time your church will have samples from past weddings to look at so you know what to put in!  Mine actually has all the stand up, sit down, kneel, kneel, kneel stuff in it and it's now on file with my church =P  You might be able to find something like that if you look around/ask around.

    And I'll share this link for all you catholic brides (it helped me A TON)  It's on the template page but it has a lot of stuff one it

    <a href="http://catholicweddinghelp.com/topics/catholic-wedding-program-template-without-mass.htm" rel="nofollow">http://catholicweddinghelp.com/topics/catholic-wedding-program-template-without-mass.htm</a>
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    bridetobe71412bridetobe71412
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    Ah, yes. I had this issue with spacing/printing. It is easier to just start from scratch in Word I think than to use the templates. I know some people (ahem, Bmorebride) are really, really good with Mac applications and said those work well, too.
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    bridetobe71412bridetobe71412
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_july-12-brides-invasion-our-advice-to-july-13-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:a215cf8b-e67d-45f6-b917-c0029818bde0Post:5409d5d2-0e73-4157-8494-a74c7e0f05b6">Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides! : I totally agree with holding off!  That's great you have everything done already!  That was our big hold up! Another thing you might want to do, chek with your priest before you print anything!  Mine had to OK ours and he didn't tell us till we met one on one with him a month before the wedding.  We hadn't done anything but don't get too carried away! And one last thing about programs, most of the time your church will have samples from past weddings to look at so you know what to put in!  Mine actually has all the stand up, sit down, kneel, kneel, kneel stuff in it and it's now on file with my church =P  You might be able to find something like that if you look around/ask around. And I'll share this link for all you catholic brides (it helped me A TON)  It's on the template page but it has a lot of stuff one it <a href="http://catholicweddinghelp.com/topics/catholic-wedding-program-template-without-mass.htm" rel="nofollow">http://catholicweddinghelp.com/topics/catholic-wedding-program-template-without-mass.htm</a>
    Posted by honeybear072012[/QUOTE]

    HB's smart. :) I totally forgot that our priest had to OK ours, too. And he did have edits when I showed him the one I printed out, so good thing I didn't make 100 of them and have to redo them. Ours didn't have the kneel/sit etc. included but I have seen some that do have it, so I would definitely ask the church before printing!
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    honeybear072012honeybear072012
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    Yeah, most of our family and friends are not catholic so it was for them more than anything.

    Anymore questions? =)
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    Getting2VowelsGetting2Vowels member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    edited August 2012
    In Response to Re:July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!:[QUOTE]Yeah, most of our family and friends are not catholic so it was for them more than anything.Anymore questions? Posted by honeybear072012[/QUOTE]

    Yes...is it July yet?! :o) lol
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    honeybear072012honeybear072012
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    Bhahahahahaha it will be soon!!  Trust us, it will FLY!
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    Getting2VowelsGetting2Vowels member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    I should get back to work. Thanks again girls!! :0) *this smiley bought to you by TK's full site* Stupid mobile! :-p
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    LilTexasGalLilTexasGal
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    Hi y'all. Thanks for all the advice. I actually discovered the "pee backwards" thing when I wore an over the top gown for a play I was in. It took us about 30 minutes to get me in the dress (no joke! soooo many buttons and lace-ups!) so during intermission I had to stay in my costume to pee. The director told me about the "butterfly" trick, and wow, it works wonders!

    And if anyone needs visual representation, here is Butters, demonstrating what we mean (I believe they call it "The Reverse Cowgirl" and according to South Park, this was in fact, the way toilets were meant to be used... you know, so you have a place to set your chocolate milk and comic.)

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    honeybear072012honeybear072012
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_july-12-brides-invasion-our-advice-to-july-13-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:a215cf8b-e67d-45f6-b917-c0029818bde0Post:78649974-874a-4907-ba20-fe86d4abdd70">Re: July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Hi y'all. Thanks for all the advice. I actually discovered the "pee backwards" thing when I wore an over the top gown for a play I was in. It took us about 30 minutes to get me in the dress (no joke! soooo many buttons and lace-ups!) so during intermission I had to stay in my costume to pee. The director told me about the "butterfly" trick, and wow, it works wonders! And if anyone needs visual representation, here is Butters, demonstrating what we mean (I believe they call it "The Reverse Cowgirl" and according to South Park, this was in fact, the way toilets were meant to be used... <strong>you know, so you have a place to set your chocolate milk and comic.)</strong>
    Posted by LilTexasGal[/QUOTE]

    Hahaha this made me LOL!

    I'm going out to dinner with DH but will reply if anyone has any questions!  Good luck ladies and feel free to pop over and ask us questions if you'd like!
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    LilTexasGalLilTexasGal
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_july-12-brides-invasion-our-advice-to-july-13-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:a215cf8b-e67d-45f6-b917-c0029818bde0Post:378ec49b-440c-489c-8e6d-bb79cdb1ca27">Re: July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!</a>:
    [QUOTE]OH!! and to add...I had crinoline for my dress....yeah, I wore them for most of the photos before the ceremony..it slid down to wear I began tripping on it...and well, I just said F it and I took it off...the dress still looked amazing...thank goodness the crinoline was a good deal!
    Posted by littlemoments324[/QUOTE]

    This is great to know actually. I was considering of having crinoline added to my dress (which ever one I end up picking) and was debating getting it added in permanently or having a removable "petticoat" type skirt. The dresses I'm looking at are a bit to "flat" without crinoline so I think I'll look into getting it added... probably be more expensive that way, but I'm about $800 below budget on the dresses I'm looking at, so I think I have room to spring for the extra crinoline.
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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
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    I'm late to the party, but I went registry completion shopping (the most fun you will ever have).

    1.) Take time to just take everything in. Not just on your wedding day, but as you are planning. It really helps to put things into perspective that you are marrying the love of your life and that is the most important thing.

    2.) Plan for the wedding you want, but realize things are going to go wrong. I had a BM drop out 6 days before the wedding, and surprisingly I stayed really cool.  I figured H and I  were still going to be married and it was her loss.

    3.) Be assertive with your vendors with what you want. They do this for a living so they will throw a ton of ideas at you in a short period of time so it is okay to tell them you need some time to decide on the details.

    Congrats to you ladies and the time will fly so enjoy it.
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    NateandJustineNateandJustine
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    Thanks for all of the advice ladies! It is very helpful!! I took some notes <3 

    Congrats to all of you who got married this year! I can't wait until July!!
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    Belle0720Belle0720 member
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    Thanks for all of the advice ladies! I never would have thought of peeing backwards--so smart!
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    pooke1221pooke1221
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    Thanks everyone for all your advice.  I am getting married on July 20, 2013.  I have booked everything except hair/make-up, cake, florist, and bridesmaid dresses.  Everything else is done.  I do have to say all of your advice is a little overwhelming and is now making me very stressed. LOL.  Thanks again and l look forward to reading some more advice later.
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    ILoveToRobotILoveToRobot member
    First Anniversary First Comment

    I would suggest hiring a DOC. If I could do it all over again I would've. Even though you dole out jobs for people not everyone follows through. I had to take initiative for a few things which was stressful. That being said, let go. Just let go. I'm fairly controlling and after I got in my wedding dress I didn't care if the flowers were right, I didn't care if the decorations were set up right. I was told to have all questions directed to certain people as pre wedding advice but the day of no one followed and I had 1,000 questions coming at me. I was answering questions through hair/makeup. Again, this is why a DOC is important because people would be asking her.

    Don't let the guys drink before the ceremony if you question their ability to control themselves and have someone check on them. Have an extra person who's "removed" from the situation watch you take photos to make sure things are going right. Chances are you'll be in your own world and won't notice things. Don't get drunk, you want to remember the whole night. Don't worry about how dirty your dress gets. It'll get dirty, trust me. I was good about not spilling on myself but holy cow the bottom of the dress has other peoples spilt wine, dirt and whatever else was on the dance floor.

    As far as planning, have fun and do as much as you can as early as you can. It gets stressful and can be annoying when people who say "oh I want to help" and then never follow through. The questions that you'll get and the comments you'll hear about your plans can be super stressful and even sometimes hurtful but just remember that people don't know and/or don't remember what it was like. You're going to hear "are you excited" a zillion times and it gets old after the first time... lol but you'll have fun. Start thinking of clever things to say to all the questions you'll get and make fun of it.

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    b14eeyoreb14eeyore
    First Comment First Anniversary
    Thanks so much for all of your advice :)  I'm sure it will come in handy down the road!
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    KatieK501KatieK501 member
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2013-weddings_july-12-brides-invasion-our-advice-to-july-13-brides?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a322ad2c-25cd-4d52-b123-096e1e4ecda5Discussion:a215cf8b-e67d-45f6-b917-c0029818bde0Post:a80a003c-2ba0-4f24-8bb4-1b1e5b11ba5d">Re: July '12 Brides Invasion: Our Advice to July '13 Brides!</a>:
    [QUOTE]I would suggest hiring a DOC. If I could do it all over again I would've. Even though you dole out jobs for people not everyone follows through. I had to take initiative for a few things which was stressful. That being said, let go. Just let go. I'm fairly controlling and after I got in my wedding dress I didn't care if the flowers were right, I didn't care if the decorations were set up right. I was told to have all questions directed to certain people as pre wedding advice but the day of no one followed and I had 1,000 questions coming at me. I was answering questions through hair/makeup. Again, this is why a DOC is important because people would be asking her. Don't let the guys drink before the ceremony if you question their ability to control themselves and have someone check on them. Have an extra person who's "removed" from the situation watch you take photos to make sure things are going right. Chances are you'll be in your own world and won't notice things. Don't get drunk, you want to remember the whole night. Don't worry about how dirty your dress gets. It'll get dirty, trust me. I was good about not spilling on myself but holy cow the bottom of the dress has other peoples spilt wine, dirt and whatever else was on the dance floor. As far as planning, have fun and do as much as you can as early as you can.<strong> It gets stressful and can be annoying when people who say "oh I want to help" and then never follow through.</strong> The questions that you'll get and the comments you'll hear about your plans can be super stressful and even sometimes hurtful but just remember that people don't know and/or don't remember what it was like. You're going to hear "are you excited" a zillion times and it gets old after the first time... lol but you'll have fun. Start thinking of clever things to say to all the questions you'll get and make fun of it.
    Posted by ILoveToRobot[/QUOTE]

    This reminded me of something else - if people do volunteer (and hopefully they follow through) - TAKE THEM UP ON THEIR HELP!  I made 140 pocket fold invitations by hand by myself - folder and all - because I wanted them to be perfect and didn't trust anyone else.  I had a lot of other stuff going on too, so it took me months of working on them a couple hours a day.  I later had everyone over who had been asking if they could help to work on multiple other projects that I didn't care as much about, and we got amazing amounts of stuff done.  I wish I had let them help on the invitations and saved myself a lot of time.  Being overly particular is only a pain.
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    owengirl996owengirl996 member
    First Anniversary First Comment

    Just remember when looking at dresses, those samples are going to be MUCH flatter than what you order! In my head, I wanted more fullness, so I ordered the crinoline too....when I actually got the dress and put it on with the crinoline, it was waaaaay too poofy! It was actually perfect without anything added under it.

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    honeybear072012honeybear072012
    First Anniversary First Comment
    We were talking early today and something was mentioned that I think bears repeating.

    If you have a corset dress, consider cutting the strings that tie it up so they're shorter.  When my dress was bustled you could totally see them if I picked up the skirt at all.  And I stepped on them!

    So I suggest snipping them shorter!  Maybe take a few inches off at most!
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