What are you skipping at your wedding?

CowgirlK39

I was reading some posts on the Recap forum about what one bride would do differently. Some of it seems so pointless or things I don't think I am even gonna need. So what standard things are you skipping/omitting?

I am not having a guestbook. I know who is gonna be there and really don't know what I would do with it afterward. I also did not do STDs. No offense to anyone who did them but I do not get the point. If you are anyone important, my mom prolly called you and raved about our wedding already. I am also skipping programs. I don't get the point of these either... come in, sit down, watch us get married, then go to the reception site. We weren't gonna do special cake cutters but FMIL bought them for us anyway for xmas. We were also gonna skip toasting glasses but we found the cutest mason-jar-like glasses so we might splurge on those. We are not doing a videographer. I don't have the money for that and I really don't know what I would do with a wedding video after the first month of "OMG LOOK AT IT!"

Our wedding is rather low key so I don't see a point to making a big deal outta some thing. But right now I have a bad attitude towards wedding stuff in generl so maybe I am just crabby.

Starfish0116

I considered skipping STD's, but with most of our guests coming from OOT it just makes more sense to send them so they can be prepared. FI has a lot of friends that I don't really know that well and like a typical guy he's not super chatty about the wedding..lol. They would have no clue if they didn't get an STD.

We're skipping the garter and bouquet toss. I'm not that into it, and most of our guests are already married. 

kellycatalo

i'm not going to have a garter toss because i think they are super awkward.

also, we aren't having a ring bearer just because we have no relatives/close friends that age.

i am not having menus at our reception because everyone is telling me their choice on the RSVP card.

we will not have an aisle runner just because i don't understand what they are for. decoration i guess?

i'm sure i'll think of more.

gabriel0915

We did STDs because we have a lot of OOT guests which is what most of us use them for. We are not doing programs, menu cards, place cards and stuff like that. We aren't doing a guest book but found a fun print on ETSY that we are using instead and we can have it framed afterwards. Definitely not doing a videographer but we spent plenty on our photographer so we are happy with her. No favors and we are doing a candy/cookie buffet instead.

I agree that somethings aren't worth the money but I guess some brides find certain things crutial to their wedding.

jessa1228

We also don't have the money for a videographer, so we're skipping that. We aren't doing a bouquet or garter toss. We aren't doing favors (although I will have a photobooth, so I guess the pictures from that could count as favors). I'm undecided about programs right now, if I do end up doing them then I think it'll just be a single sheet of pretty paper, just plain and simple. I think that's it.

ETA: aisle runner, guestbook, ring bearer, menu cards. The only dances we're doing are our first dance and the father/daughter dance.

BMcLeodTeam

I went through the crabby feeling, so I know that one! I am not doing a traditional videographer because I found they are WAY overpriced, however we are using a company called Wedit for a more 'home movie' style wedding video for much cheaper.

I have a guestbook... wasn't going to for awhile,  but then we did a photobooth and the company threw that in too, but I think this will be fun... its like a scrapbook where they get to put their photos in and decorate with stickers/pens/etc. The photo strips will also double as favours because I'm not doing those.

MillBride2012

No videographer and no wedding party!

Starfish0116

I just thought of another..

We're skipping menu cards. We're having a buffet, so they don't have to choose what they want. I feel like it's a waste of money to have them printed for 300+ place settings, especially when they'll walk through the buffet line and see what is there.

romamor4

We did STDs but that's because a lot of our guests are from out of town. 

We are not doing a videographer. As much as I would love to have it later, as you said, we'll look at it once and put it away. Sometimes I change my mind and would like one just because I think it would be cool to be able to watch my parents get married if they had one. But it's just too expensive in the end. 

We are doing programs because it's a way to honor our wedding party, those who have passed, communicate our new address and e-mail, as well as allow the guests to see where we are in the program. I know as a guest I've always appreciated being able to know what's coming next in a ceremony. But that's just me. 

We are most definitely skipping the garter toss and bouquet toss. The garter toss is just awkward, as kellycatalo said. The bouquet toss is pointless because there won't be many singles. 

We are probably going to skip introducing the wedding party into the reception just because we are planning on being at our cocktail hour. I would like to do something just for fun, though, in place of this. If anyone has any ideas, please let me know! It can even be something later on in the reception!

We are DEFINITELY skipping wedding party dance. I think it's silly and awkward to make a bridesmaid dance with a groomsman she has never met before in her life or is just paired up with for the weddings sake. 

Wow, that was a long one! lol

junebug19

Skipping the garter and bouquet toss; no place cards at the table; no aisle runner ; Don't have anyone to act as a ringbearer; we also don't have money for a videographer (I don't see myself watching it either)
I'm thinking about skipping the menus, but dinner is family style and I would like everyone to know what they are eating, so maybe just one per table.

We did STDs b/c we had quite a few OOT (and country) and I wanted them to have hotel info.
Guest Book is going to be the "finger print" tree (usually leaf stamps though) that will then be framed.

mamameech

We are "skipping" some traditional things for some alternatives.
Like our guestbook is actually a game of jenga; guests will sign the blocks and we can play at the cottage
We aren't doing a cake; we will have cake pops instead so no cake topper.
No rice/bubbles after the ceremony; just wands
I sent STD/xmas cards.

We aren't doing the garter/bouquet thing. We aren't having a stag and doe. We aren't having flowers at the church or at the reception (just bouquets/boutenniers). We aren't renting a limo; we will have a friend drive a fancy car for us. We aren't doing RSVP cards; online or by phone only.

We are doing things that are extra tho too like the video cameras and the choreographer. I'm doing a lot of DIY crafty stuff too that isn't "necessary" but so fun for me.

It really all depends on priorities, budget and just personal preference. I wouldn't knock anyone for doing something differently because that's what makes this so fun and unique!

Sarah&Eric2012

We won't have an aisle runner, mostly because I didn't want the hassle of picking one out and paying for it but also because the church doesn't allow it.

We did STDs because most of my family is coming from OOT so it gave them the heads up and allowed everyone to have the wedding website address.

I'm on the fence for the garter and bouquet toss.  It is awkward but my younger cousins get so excited when they get to go out and try to catch stuff.  There will be nothing further than tossing the items, I won't be having the garter put on the girl who catches the bouquet because of the age factor involved.

No ring bearer or flower girl.  FI's cousin has 5 year old twins (a boy and a girl) who would have been perfect but I didn't really want to worry about crying kids during the ceremony.  They are invited, just not part of the wedding party.

Katiesue04

No garter toss, I always think these are so unecessary at weddings.  I am going to have a hard time eating in front of everyone and standing in front of everyone at the ceremony.  I can't imagine having my husband go up my dress to grab a garter in front everyone yikes!

volleygurl0306

We also are skipping the videographer.  I do want our ceremony on video though (only going to be 20 min long) so we are just going to set up a tripod with our camcorder.  I hear the ceremony is a blur and could see us watching on anniversaries but not watching hte reception.

No FG or RB.  We love and want children but didn't want our wedding to revolve around tantrums and naptime so we skipped this for our sanity.  No kids will be at the wedding at all.

No fancy cake cutter.  Toasting Flutes only because they were a gift.  No favors.  People don't have a meal choice so no menus because you're hungry or your not.  No aisle runner. 

We emailed STDs and saved the money.  Wanted to do our OOT guests a courtesy though (my whole side is OOT).  Programs for now I'm skipping.  May decide last minute to do them if I can score a free VP something.

Our budget requires us to skip a DJ.  This one I'm most upset about but there's just no way we can swing it.

We won't be doing a WP dance either since our BM and GM don't know each other.  I happen to like the bouquet and garter toss BUT am against the guy who catches the garter putting it on the woman who catches the bouquet so we'll skip this part.  They can just take a pic together.

adktd2boots

No bouquet or garter toss.  Actually, In Montana they auction the garter, but I still don't want to do it.

No WP dance- hello weird!  (I was also very awkwardly posed in a friend's photo once, so I will make sure there is none of that funky business! I was NOT dating that guy, it's the groom's brother.  Also I'm taller than him so my heels are sunk in the grass) 



No favors (unless you count the mason jars they are drinking from and can keep if they want)

I'm fighting FI about programs. I think they're a waste, he wants them

No intro to reception, it's all at the same place.

No menu, buffet style

Guestbook is signed bottles of wine, more of a home decor kind of thing.

We did STDs as Christmas cards- wedding is DW for us.

I hate the sound of my voice and watching myself, so no videographer.

Dessert table, not a big cake. So no cake cutters.

No toasting glasses, will toast with whatever we're drinking from

I also think aisle runners are goofy.

No ringbearer/flower girl.

FI wants ushers, I think people know what chairs are for.

celticmyss

We're skipping a lot.

I am not wearing a garter, let alone tossing it.

No bouquet toss.

No STDs.

No programs or menus.

No rehearsal. (we will do a "welcome" dinner)

No videographer or DJ

No special cake cutter or toasting glasses 

No receiving line or even formal introduction of us to the reception

No ring bearer or flower girl and no children at the wedding at all 

No dancing at all

No champagne toast, people can toast with whatever they have handy. We have quite a few people who don't drink coming. 

I am pretty sure there is other stuff I am forgetting. We are only having 25 people which makes it easier to skip certain things. 

beckyboo27

We are not having a ring bearer or ushers because there is no one young enough in my family to play ther role of a RB and my FI thinks ushers are "guys not good enough to be picked as GM."

We are not doing the bouquet/garter toss because we are the last in our circle to get married. Instead, we are doing a couple's dance based on how many years they've been married. The last couple standing gets the bouquet/garter.

We are not doing Save the Dates because we only have a few people OOT that are coming in for the wedding and they are in the wedding. If they can't figure out they are invited, that's their problem. ;p

We are not doing menus because we're having a buffet dinner.

We're not doing the "traditional" bridal party dance, we're doing something called a snowball dance (I think that's what it's called.) You start out with Bride, Groom and WP, then everyone runs out and grabs a new partner and drags them to the dance floor until everyone at the reception is dancing. I've been to several weddings where they've done this instead of a WP dance and it was more fun because everyone was involved, and the WP isn't dancing with people they don't know for a full song.

I think that's it so far.

volleygurl0306

Forgot we are also skipping the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner.  And like mamma we are doing online RSVPs (phone for those w/o internet).  We have a guest book alternative which is a frame with a photo mat everyone will sign.

I like hearing what people are skipping.  It's the reverse of what's important to them in a way and what makes their wedding unique!

katiebean1

We are doing:
STD's
Simple programs
Bouquet toss
Thumbprint tree for guest book
Rehearsal dinner
RSVP's
Ring bearer and flower girl

Not doing:
Garter toss
Isle runner
Champagne toast
Wedding party dance
Ushers
Videographer

Undecided on:
Toasting flutes
Special cake cutter
Unity candle or sand ceremony (I wasn't planning on doing either, but the pastor marrying us feels strongly that we should)

CowgirlK39

Omg you all mention things that I either didn't know about or forgot I am not doing!

More "nots": FG/RB... no kids what so ever
                     WP dance.... I have never even heard of this till i joined TK.
                     No menu... family style dinner instead.
                     No M/S dance because FMIL would use it as a chance to make everything about her and cause a scene.
                    
Stupid question... the aisle runner is the thing you walk on for the ceremony right? I think I NEED that since the ground will be stone and dirt. Ugh, more crap I don't wanna pay for.

spalihena

No boquets for bridesmaids - doing a small jewelled clutch instead so they can use it again!
No flowers for the men
No flower girls or ring bearers - kids are unpredictable..
no garter or garter toss...

will be having a videographer so my grandma can see the ceremony...
dont want a guestbook  - looking for something fun that would be an alternative...

canwaittobemrsd

Not doing STD. There's 4 people from out of town and they already know the date.

No ring bearer but we are having 4 flower girls (although the church says there should only be 1).

I think we're doing a runner only because it's included with the limo.  No church decorations.  I think it looks fine the way it is.  I'm on the fence about programs.  Only a MOH and a BM.  No unity candle or anything like it.  I don't like them and church discourages them. No ushers.  Like adktd2boots, I think people can figure out where to sit.

No videographer. Again like adktd2boots not a fan of watching myself.  No menu because it's a buffet.  Probably a champange toast, although FH doesn't drink, but no special glasses.  No bouquet/garter toss.  I'm really not a fan of either.  Our favors are going to be a candy bar because I looooove candy!  No special cake cutters unless someone buys the for us.  I can use a regular knife.

romamor4

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_what-are-you-skipping-at-your-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:1c76e97b-372a-4ff0-95b2-8e49c2217c50Post:e4493fd1-39a0-4fd5-8b8d-212d93b8ee02">Re: What are you skipping at your wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]No bouquet or garter toss.  Actually, In Montana they auction the garter, but I still don't want to do it. No WP dance- hello weird!  (I was also very awkwardly posed in a friend's photo once, so I will make sure there is none of that funky business! I was NOT dating that guy, it's the groom's brother.  Also I'm taller than him so my heels are sunk in the grass)  No favors (unless you count the mason jars they are drinking from and can keep if they want) I'm fighting FI about programs. I think they're a waste, he wants them No intro to reception, it's all at the same place. No menu, buffet style Guestbook is signed bottles of wine, more of a home decor kind of thing. We did STDs as Christmas cards- wedding is DW for us. I hate the sound of my voice and watching myself, so no videographer. Dessert table, not a big cake. So no cake cutters. No toasting glasses, will toast with whatever we're drinking from I also think aisle runners are goofy. No ringbearer/flower girl. FI wants ushers, I think people know what chairs are for.
Posted by adktd2boots[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I love your attitude here! We also aren't having ushers and WOW that photo!?!?! How strange to have you do something like that with someone you don't know!!

</div>

adktd2boots

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_what-are-you-skipping-at-your-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:1c76e97b-372a-4ff0-95b2-8e49c2217c50Post:8c51b883-7ed9-4534-bbb4-8c3a211205fc">Re: What are you skipping at your wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]Omg you all mention things that I either didn't know about or forgot I am not doing! More "nots": FG/RB... no kids what so ever                      WP dance.... I have never even heard of this till i joined TK.                      No menu... family style dinner instead.                      No M/S dance because FMIL would use it as a chance to make everything about her and cause a scene.                      Stupid question... the aisle runner is the thing you walk on for the ceremony right? <strong>I think I NEED that since the ground will be stone and dirt. Ugh, more crap I don't wanna pay for.
</strong>Posted by CowgirlK39[/QUOTE]

I would skip it.  Yea, your train might get a little dirty, but it's nothing dry cleaning can't remove.  Aisle runners can be a tripping hazard. 

adktd2boots

Skipping the matching bridal party.  I don't want everyone looking the same.

No flowers for the guys.  If you can't figure out that a guy standing up front is a GM, I don't think a flower is going to help. 

NO2012

We are doing:
STDs (it's a DW to New Orleans)
Programs (having full Catholic Mass...some may need explanation and quite frankly it gives people something to read & look at during the hour long ceremony )
RD
RB/FG (FI's children)
Videographer (originally not in budget, but since it is looking like my elderly grandparents might not make it due to health reasons, we decided to spend the $ so they can see it all if they can't make it   )
Special cake cutter & toasting glasses (my mom insisted and is buying)
Menus (debating...even though we are having a buffet, alot of it will be New Orleans food and I thought guests might like to know what to expect before getting in line...and it may help me fill up the table space since we won't be having full place settings like with a seated dinner or traditional favors on the tables)
Traditional RSVPs

We are NOT doing:
Garter/bouquet toss (no thank you! instead I am doing a New Orleans/southern tradition called a "cake pull "for my BM and close girlfriends...I am disregarding the marital status part and choosing charms that are universal and not related to being single)
Aisle runner (getting married in a Cathedral, so not necessary and not permitted)
Traditional Guest Book (instead my photobooth package comes with a guest book created there at the reception...guests are given 2 strips for every picture and 1 is for them to paste into the guestbook provided where they will sign & leave messages.
Unity Candle or Sand (even though we are the usual candidates for the sand ceremony, we both agree (along with our priest) that it's a bit much and the marriage ceremony in and of itself is what symbolically binds us together as a new family)
Traditional Favors (I'm considering the photobooth pics as favors and the handkerchiefs with our names on them that we hand out for the wedding parade)
WP dance....never even heard of it!  And boots' story says it all!

beckyboo27

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_what-are-you-skipping-at-your-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:1c76e97b-372a-4ff0-95b2-8e49c2217c50Post:4c47b68a-9c38-4728-a1e7-afe95176efd9">Re: What are you skipping at your wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]We are NOT doing: Garter/bouquet toss (no thank you! instead I am doing a New Orleans/southern tradition called a "cake pull "for my BM and close girlfriends...I am disregarding the marital status part and choosing charms that are universal and not related to being single) 
Posted by NO2012[/QUOTE]

<div>I love this!  We did this for my brother/SIL's wedding a few years ago. My family is from NOLA so they incorporated a lot of New Orleans traditions into their wedding. FI and I are going to do the same.</div>

junebug19

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_september-2012-weddings_what-are-you-skipping-at-your-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:a464c18c-2e4d-469b-8eae-3865079cb9cfDiscussion:1c76e97b-372a-4ff0-95b2-8e49c2217c50Post:8c51b883-7ed9-4534-bbb4-8c3a211205fc">Re: What are you skipping at your wedding?</a>:
[QUOTE]Omg you all mention things that I either didn't know about or forgot I am not doing! More "nots": FG/RB... no kids what so ever                      WP dance.... I have never even heard of this till i joined TK.                      <strong>No menu... family style dinner</strong> instead.                      No M/S dance because FMIL would use it as a chance to make everything about her and cause a scene.                      Stupid question... the aisle runner is the thing you walk on for the ceremony right? I think I NEED that since the ground will be stone and dirt. Ugh, more crap I don't wanna pay for.
Posted by CowgirlK39[/QUOTE]

I am doing a family style dinner as well and I was going to skip menus but then I read somewhere that it is a good idea to let guests know what dishes will be on the table, in case of any allergies, so now I think I am going to do one menu for the whole table. One of my dishes has shellfish in it, so I figured it is a good idea.

SCogs18

We are doing:
Videographer- our elderly grandparents can't travel--with the video, they can still see the ceremony
STDs- 70% of our guests are OOT and traveling from as far as Europe.
Special Cake Cutters
Bouquet/Garter toss

We are NOT doing:
Programs
Menu Cards
Toasting flutes (we are using my parent's flutes from their house)

No receiving line
Bridal Party Introduction

No flower girl/ring bearer
No Unity candle

I'd gladly skip the garter toss, but FI is insisting on doing it and there are very few things he actually cares about.

shaer2

Having:
First Dance
Father/Daughter dance although it's Bride/Son dance
STD's - got them for free on Vistaprint
Guestbook alternative - vintage postcards
Ringbearers - my youngest son and nephew
Unity candles with my two sons to show the blending of the family
Children - I have two and we have many children in our family that we have always included in all of our celebrations

Not having:
Flowergirl
WP dance
Bouquet Toss/Garter toss
Limo - Driving my SUV myself (I got yelled at by my bridesmaid for this one)
Programs
Bridesmaids in same dresses
Veil
Videographer
toasting glasses

wcasar

Off hand I know...

No Ring Bearer

No Programs

No Aisle Runner

No Favors

No Videographers or Photo Booth