How do you indicate attire?

cmkuno

Is there a polite way to indicate to guests what the appropriate attire is for your wedding?  If so, what would you say to indicate that it's a formal reception, but not necessarily cocktail, black tie or even black tie optional?  Basically, I'd just like the guys to wear suits.  Should this info go on the invite itself or the reception card or somewhere else entirely?

I'm afraid guests might not pick up on something as subtle as "formal reception to follow," or take cues from the formality of the invitation.  My family is not big on dressing up, and I'm afraid if I don't specifically say something about what to wear, people will dress way too casually.  Not that it's the end of the world, but it would be nice to keep it kind of formal and fancy.  TIA!

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

No, sorry, you can't do it - especially if it's just "formal" or semi-formal.

If someone doesn't know that they should probably wear a suit or a cocktail dress to the average wedding, or they should take a cue from the formality of the invitation, it is not your fault. It reflects on them. And most of them won't even be in your pictures. ;-)

The only time it would be okay to indicate it would be if the venue *requires* black tie (or white tie) attire.

If someone asks you (or your parents) what they should wear, you can say it's formal but you don't expect anyone to wear a tux! Just suits or cocktail dresses are fine!

danieliza1127

I don't think there's any way to do this unless you go actual "Black Tie".  You can't dictate what your guests wear, especially when it comes to men in suits.  Not all men even own suits and you can't expect them to go out and buy one just for your wedding.  My H and I always dress up for weddings and he'll wear a button down shirt and dress pants, but he rarely ever wears a whole suit. 

What your guests wear really doesn't matter.  I can tell you I don't even remember what any of my guests wore, aside from a couple of women whose dresses I remember because they were so pretty. 

squirrly

Some venues do have a dress code that requires men to wear a coat and tie, etc.  If that's an official policy with them, you can note that on the reception insert.  Otherwise, you can't.

cmkuno

At my cousin's wedding, many of my family members came in jeans or other very casual pants.  I really don't think the issue is that they don't own nice clothes, they just don't like to wear them unless they absolutely have to.  FI's family is very formal and I just don't want mine to look like hicks by comparison.  But I guess I just need to hope and pray...

squirrly

Word of mouth is your friend, here.

MyNameIsNot

Spread by word of mouth that it is semi-formal.  (Or tell them formal). 

If you have a website, you can put a FAQ on there about proper attire. 

aerinpegadrak

I was going to bring up the point that squirrly raised, that some venues like country clubs will actually turn away guests who aren't dressed appropriately, say, men not wearing jackets.  But short of that, I would just try to spread word of mouth. 

We have a blurb about attire on our website, but it's as much to indicate that all other wedding weekend events (including the RD) are casual as that the wedding is formal.

cmkuno

Ooooh, love the webste idea!  Thanks!!

KappaK

Websites and word of mouth are your friend for people who don't take subtle cues.  Also you invitations themselves, the location, and the time of the wedding can also give clues as to how one should dress.  In the end though, everyone will be focused on you and your FI.  The only time I remember what a guest wore to a wedding was, well twice actually.  Once because that exact same dress at home, and another girl looked a little like Moritcia Adams, but it didn't make me enjoy the wedding any less or think poorly of the bride and groom.  All I thought was, hmm she looks like a member of the Adams Family

gower2be

Word of mouth would be your best bet.