Help with Wording... Bus to Cruise for my Wedding?!

magenta321

We are getting married on a Cruise Ship.  None of our guests are sailing on the ship, they are just attending our wedding and the reception, then leaving.  We are providing a bus for round-trip transportation from some place close to where most of my guests live to the ship.  How does this sound?

Mr. and Mrs. ABC invite you to the wedding of their daughterMargaret ABC

to 

Kevin XYZ 

on Saturday, May twenty-second, two thousand ten 

aboard the Royal Caribbean Explorer of the Seas

in Cape Liberty Seaport, Cape Liberty, New Jersey

Reception to follow after the ceremony.  

Coach buses will depart from the Exit # Commuter Lot in (town) at 8 am, for the convenience and comfort of all guests.  

Am I missing anything?  Any suggestions?

I also have to have response cards which not only find out if people are coming... but also ask information for customs (yes, even though they are only boarding the ship... not departing on the ship).  How does this sound?

Kindly respond by April #, 2010.

M_________________________

___ accepts  ____ regrets

Due to U.S. Customs Regulations, please also submit the following information for all attendees on the reverse side: 

Full Name(s) (First and Last)

Date(s) of Birth

Citizenship (if non-U.S.)

Driver's License Number(s) 

Please remember to bring your driver's license when you come to our wedding.  Children under 15 must bring their birth certificates.  

mwhitson14

I think the wording sounds fine, but this:

Coach buses will depart from the Exit # Commuter Lot in (town) at 8 am, for the convenience and comfort of all guests.  

needs to be on an insert, not on the invite itself.

Also, does everyone boarding need a driver's license? What if they don't have a driver's license? Will any picture ID work? You might need to change that up a bit, because there could be some over 15 that don't have a driver's license and may think they don't need to bring anything.

squirrly

Yeah, all of the logistics info should be on a separate insert.  The invite itself should read:

Mr. and Mrs. ABC
invite you to the wedding of their daughterMargaret ABCto Kevin XYZ on Saturday, the twenty second of May,
two thousand ten 
Royal Caribbean Explorer of the SeasCape Liberty Seaport
Cape Liberty, New Jersey
Reception immediately following 

I would include an "About Our Wedding" card were you note the customs requirements, the bus, that they will be boarding the ship and then debarking before it leaves port, etc.