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Addressing Save the Dates/Invites

Save the Dates came in today!  Planning to send them out in early January, so will probably start addressing them when I have time. 

A few questions. 

1.  Do I put "and guest" on Save the Dates or just invites? 

2.  For some of our guests, I know they have been in long term relationships but we have not met the significant other. To complicate it more, the guest I have in mind is my gay cousin, who has never verbally told my family he's gay, but is very open about his relationship on FB.  He and his SO live together, but they live several states away, so no one in my family has ever met the SO.  Advice?  Do I list this as: 
Mr. John Smith
Mr. Steve Jones

or Mr. John Smith and guest ? 
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Re: Addressing Save the Dates/Invites

  • I know you're going to be told not to include and guest on the STDs, but I am because they need to know if making travel arragements.

    I would address it as you said.

    Mr. John Smith
    Mr. Steve Jones
  • If people are in a significant relationship, I was address the STDs to both of them, like pp did for cousin
  • If the guest is in a relationship, you should put their partner's name.  I believe in gay relationships the names are listed alphabetically.  The way you have it formatted (on separate lines) is correct since they are not married.

  • I've been told that the wording on the save the dates can be much less formal than that of the invitiations.  For example, I am addressing mine using like:

    John and Mary Smith

    Whereas for the invitations, I would do:

    Mr. and Mrs. John Smith

    Of course, variations will exist where women have hyphenated their names, and for unmarried couples.

    Also, I am in a rush to send out my save the dates (they are already a month later than I wanted them to be), and I know some relationships could possibly change.  So, for my friends who are in newer relationships, or for guests who will be given a "plus one" because they won't know anyone else there, my plan is to send the save the date, and then find out who their guest will be prior to sending the invitations.  That being said, I'm not giving every guest a plus one or a date.  It was a tough choice, and I know everyone tackles it differently, but that's what I am planning to do.

    I'm not sure if that helps you much, but my point is that your save the dates can be worded somewhat more informally if that's something you're okay with.

  • I am getting ready to send out STDs and wondered if these should also be hand written or can labels be printed instead for the STDs since these are more informal?  The wedding invitations will be hand written.
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