May 2012 Weddings

On the verge of tears....

I can't deal with this anymore. I wrote a post about two hours ago regarding my mom and number of people we are inviting. Well I just got off the phone with her and she is basically yelling at me about how many people FI family invited. She basically telling my how inconsiderate his side of the family is and she doesn't need to hear how big his side the family is and how they could invite 400 people. I keep telling her they didn't realize it and we never set a limit to how many people. She told me it's basicailly all about me and not him. I understand she is paying for it and there is a budget. I get that but she doesn't need to be rude. The wedding is about me and my FI. Then she started going off about how we don't have jobs when it reality FI has good temp job that could possibly turn into permanant. She is biascially embarrassed by us.  It is turning into her wedding and I can't deal with anyomore. I wish we just eloped it would have been a lot easier and I wouldn't have had so many tears. I can't deal  with this 2 months before the wedding. Sorry for this post. 
image 204 Invited
image 148 Are ready to party!
image 56 Will be missing out!
image 0 Are MIA!
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Re: On the verge of tears....

  • I am so sorry you have to deal with this. I couldn't imagine having someone else in control of OUR special day. Like you said it's not just about you it's about you and your FI.

    Is she telling you that you have to uninvite these people?
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  • I'm so sorry!  Hopefully, your mom will calm down and stop being a Momzilla.  Keep you chin up, you're in the home stretch!
  • She is calling my FMIL and telling her to uninvite people.
    image 204 Invited
    image 148 Are ready to party!
    image 56 Will be missing out!
    image 0 Are MIA!
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  • That is so horrible. I'm so sorry. I wish there was something I could say or do to make you feel better but I know nothing will. I hope things get better for you!
  • comeongetdowncomeongetdown member
    First Comment
    edited March 2012
    omg!  i am SO sorry about this!  i can't believe she's calling your FMIL and telling her to uninvite people, that's pretty rude!  i hope her actions don't change your FMIL's opinion of you (if you guys have a good relationship).  i really wish there was something we could do to make you feel better.  :(

    i'm sending good knottie vibes your way.  ((((hugs))))
  • edited March 2012
    I am so sorry this is happening. Hopefully your mother callling FMIL won't reflect badly on you. I don't understand why she is making such a big deal over this. My FI's side is bigger, too. Hopefully you have a good enough relationship with FMIL that she will understand it's your mother and not you. And you are right, it's about you and your FI, not JUST you. Tell mom to take a chill pill. Keep us updated and hope it gets better!
  • I'm so sorry! I don't know your Mom but would it help if you told her what you just told us? That she's ruining this experience for you and making you want to elope? She does want this to be about you after all so maybe making her realize how much she's hurting you will help?
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  • What I have learned through this process is that your wedding is huge to your mom.  Now, there is no reason on the earth she needs to be responding to you like she is.  Did you all discuss #'s when you sent out the invites?  Did you send out invites yet? 

    I'm really sorry your mother is acting like this.  I've found that  people become zilla's right before your very eyes when it comes to YOUR wedding.  We didn't realize having a beach ceremony was going to cause such an uproar in our families (sand in our shoes!).  Geez....

    Try to remember what is important, you and your fiance.  At the end of the day it will be about the two of you and your future....

    Hugs coming your way
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  • First  {{HUGS}}!! Your mom seems to be feeling the wedding stress. Can she not afford more people?? Maybe she's acting out because she didn't realise what she was getting herself into. 

    I think it was out of line for your mom to speak to you that way. You need to stand up for yourself and your FI. She may be stressed but it is no excuse to go ZILLA on you.

    I hope you guys work things out!
  • Sorry to hear that your mom is being ridiculous.  I'd give her a piece of my mind next time I talked to her, whether she was paying for the wedding or not.
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  • I am so sorry that your mom is behaving this way! Did you send out STDs? What kind of conversation did you have about budget and how many guests each side is allowed to invite?
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