How do I ask my bridesmaids?

pArtyprincEss11

I recently got engaged and we were going to have the wedding in 2015. Well  things changed and the wedding is now on New Years Eve this year!!! EEEK I know its a Tuesday, but most people have off on New YEars Day.

But, my question is, how do I ask my bridesmaids? With under a year to go, I really want them to order their dresses soon. I have to go look for my dress too and I want them all to come with me.

I think my MOH will be my best friend. She is perfect with planning parties and she loves doing it.

My other BMs are my sister, Fiancee's sister and then four of my friends.

Do you have any good ideas on how to ask them?

Maggie0829

Call them up or if possible, talk to them in person.  A simple  "Will you be a bridesmaid in my wedding?" should suffice.

snowflAykE

Get them a cute card or write them a fun poem! Everybody loves a poem!

MyNameIsNot

Just ask them.  Either ask them in person or over the phone.  

You shouldn't be choosing them based on their ability to plan parties and what not.  You should ask your closest friend to be your MOH because she is your closest friend, not because you think she'll throw you a shower. 

maybehArtE1

Make them an awesome box and send it to them. It could include all the bridesmaids duties and the cute tshirts that say bridesmaid in rhinestones. Ooo, and a hand painted wine glass that says bridesmaid.

pArtyprincEss11

Oh Snow, thats a good idea!

ALso, how do you get the picture on the bottom of the page?

snowflAykE

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_how-do-i-ask-my-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:8850b7a0-8230-4d35-9259-22ef47031383Post:7c059e32-1ad2-43b0-b6c0-0dd09805a1c8">Re:How do I ask my bridesmaids?</a>:
[QUOTE]Make them an awesome box and send it to them. It could include all the bridesmaids duties and the cute tshirts that say bridesmaid in rhinestones. Ooo, and a hand painted wine glass that says bridesmaid.
Posted by maybehArtE1[/QUOTE]
That sounds like a lot of work. How will she get those made when she doesn't already have bridesmaids to help?

pArtyprincEss11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_how-do-i-ask-my-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:8850b7a0-8230-4d35-9259-22ef47031383Post:7c059e32-1ad2-43b0-b6c0-0dd09805a1c8">Re:How do I ask my bridesmaids?</a>:
[QUOTE]Make them an awesome box and send it to them. It could include all the bridesmaids duties and the cute tshirts that say bridesmaid in rhinestones. Ooo, and a <strong>hand painted wine glass that says bridesmaid</strong>.
Posted by maybehArtE1[/QUOTE]

They all do like wine!

pArtyprincEss11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_how-do-i-ask-my-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:8850b7a0-8230-4d35-9259-22ef47031383Post:88ff0977-8828-4b8a-b75d-71ff8ea3a44a">Re: How do I ask my bridesmaids?</a>:
[QUOTE]Just ask them.  Either ask them in person or over the phone.   You shouldn't be choosing them based on their ability to plan parties and what not.  You should ask your closest friend to be your MOH because she is your closest friend, not because you think she'll throw you a shower. 
Posted by MyNameIsNot[/QUOTE]

She's the one that asked me about it. She said she loves doing that kind of stuff.

pArtyprincEss11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_how-do-i-ask-my-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:8850b7a0-8230-4d35-9259-22ef47031383Post:7c059e32-1ad2-43b0-b6c0-0dd09805a1c8">Re:How do I ask my bridesmaids?</a>:
[QUOTE]Make them an awesome box and send it to them. It could include all the bridesmaids duties and the cute tshirts that say bridesmaid in rhinestones. Ooo, and a hand painted wine glass that says bridesmaid.
Posted by maybehArtE1[/QUOTE]

I've never been in a wedding. What list of duties are you talking about?

Maggie0829

OP please don't listen to the craziness that are the trolls.  They have all come out from under their bridges to cause trouble and stir the pot.

BMs have no "duties" other then buy the designated dress and show up presentable and sober on your wedding day.  Of your friends and family members want to help out with things they will volunteer.  Also, any pre-wedding parties are optional, not required.  If they (meaning your BMs, other friends and/or family members) decide not to throw you a shower or bach party then you just don't get one.

Ask the people that are nearest and dearest to you, not the people who you feel like you have to ask out of obligation.

maybehArtE1

In Response to Re:How do I ask my bridesmaids?:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:How do I ask my bridesmaids?:Make them an awesome box and send it to them. It could include all the bridesmaids duties and the cute tshirts that say bridesmaid in rhinestones. Ooo, and a hand painted wine glass that says bridesmaid.Posted by maybehArtE1I've never been in a wedding. What list of duties are you talking about? Posted by pArtyprincEss11[/QUOTE]

Like throwing you a couple showers and your bachelorette party in cancun. And that they'll wear the awesome dress, shoes, and jewelry you pick out. And get their hair and make up done because they all need to be in the same shade of coral lipstick. And if course helping you plan. Unless they help pick out center pieces, they're not good bridesmaids.

snowflAykE

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_how-do-i-ask-my-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:8850b7a0-8230-4d35-9259-22ef47031383Post:2bd09fc7-0523-4981-ac37-98d922894c01">Re: How do I ask my bridesmaids?</a>:
[QUOTE]Oh Snow, thats a good idea! ALso, how do you get the picture on the bottom of the page?
Posted by pArtyprincEss11[/QUOTE]
I don't know. I just add it in every time. <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-tongue-out.gif" border="0" alt="Tongue Out" title="Tongue Out" /> 

pArtyprincEss11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_how-do-i-ask-my-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:8850b7a0-8230-4d35-9259-22ef47031383Post:4b7347af-7c7e-4072-982b-da59141f7e9a">Re:How do I ask my bridesmaids?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:How do I ask my bridesmaids?: Like throwing you a couple showers and your bachelorette party in cancun. And that they'll wear the awesome dress, shoes, and jewelry you pick out. And get their hair and make up done because they all need to be in the same shade of coral lipstick. And if course helping you plan. Unless they help pick out center pieces, they're not good bridesmaids.
Posted by maybehArtE1[/QUOTE]

My MOH is a single mom, with no baby daddy in the picture. I don't think I coulld do that to her. Thats a lot of money.

SpArklEFantastic

Omg I love the rhinestone teeshirt idea! Oh wait, you could even do one of those cute mooning shots with rhinestone panties!!!

efmcc67

Anyone else finding it a little disorienting to watch a lot of trolls talking to each other?

pArtyprincEss11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_how-do-i-ask-my-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:8850b7a0-8230-4d35-9259-22ef47031383Post:932dd109-c886-4b5c-b771-48d4dec384f9">Re: How do I ask my bridesmaids?</a>:
[QUOTE]OP please don't listen to the craziness <strong>that are the trolls</strong>.  They have all come out from under their bridges to cause trouble and stir the pot. BMs have no "duties" other then buy the designated dress and show up presentable and sober on your wedding day.  Of your friends and family members want to help out with things they will volunteer.  Also, any pre-wedding parties are optional, not required.  If they (meaning your BMs, other friends and/or family members) decide not to throw you a shower or bach party then you just don't get one. <strong>Ask the people that are nearest and dearest to you, not the people who you feel like you have to ask out of obligation.
</strong>Posted by Maggie0829[/QUOTE]

Why would someone be so mean? I came here to get some good advice from people and they do that do other girls?

She is my BFF though. We do everything together. Her son even calls me his Aunt!!

efmcc67

Sadly, you came here on April Fools Day. It's not usually this crazy! 

It's absolutely fine to ask your BFF to be your MOH. I think Maggie just meant ask her *because* she's your BFF, not because she's good at planning parties.

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_how-do-i-ask-my-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:8850b7a0-8230-4d35-9259-22ef47031383Post:70bb1643-6856-476e-9452-6ae73622ae1e">Re: How do I ask my bridesmaids?</a>:
[QUOTE]Sadly, you came here on April Fools Day. It's not usually this crazy! <strong> It's absolutely fine to ask your BFF to be your MOH. I think Maggie just meant ask her *because* she's your BFF, not because she's good at planning parties.
</strong>Posted by efmcc67[/QUOTE]

This exactly.  A lot of new brides come on here and say that they want to ask so and so to be in their wedding because they are so organized and good planners or they have to ask so and so because of family obligation.  I just wanted to note that the people who should be asked are your nearest and dearest and if your MOH fits that bill then great!  Anything else like her wanting to help plan some pre-wedding parties are just perks.

Oh and about the trolls, yeah, I would just ignore anyone else that has just joined today.  After today they should slowly disappear.

KnotIrene

Ok, I've been patient, but I've had just about enough of today's new posters trying to stir up trouble on this and other boards.  Please stop.  Thank you.

misshart00

Has anyone noticed that OP had an AE in her name? I don't think she's a newb either.

Stina51286

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_how-do-i-ask-my-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:8850b7a0-8230-4d35-9259-22ef47031383Post:0d7fea7c-4f31-43f0-85e4-215d3f23465a">How do I ask my bridesmaids?</a>:
[QUOTE]I recently got engaged and we were going to have the wedding in 2015. Well  things changed and the wedding is now on New Years Eve this year!!! EEEK I know its a Tuesday, but most people have off on New YEars Day. <strong>But, my question is, how do I ask my bridesmaids? With under a year to go, I really want them to order their dresses soon. I have to go look for my dress too and I want them all to come with me.</strong> I think my MOH will be my best friend. She is perfect with planning parties and she loves doing it. My other BMs are my sister, <strong>Fiancee's </strong>sister and then four of my friends. Do you have any good ideas on how to ask them?
Posted by pArtyprincEss11[/QUOTE]

For the bolded, you have some time yet. Just ask each girl individually. Also, with regards to dresses, please make sure to ask their budget first instead of just picking a dress you like.

Also, he is your FIANCE, not Fiancee.

Maggie0829

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_how-do-i-ask-my-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:8850b7a0-8230-4d35-9259-22ef47031383Post:b40d61a0-cf65-4fbc-aa00-c351fd2f1827">Re:How do I ask my bridesmaids?</a>:
[QUOTE]Has anyone noticed that OP had an AE in her name? I don't think she's a newb either.
Posted by misshart00[/QUOTE]

I thought she was a troll at first as well because of her SN but I am I leaning more towards her being legit.

Stina51286

Misshart- I thought the same thing, however, she's been posting since the middle of March. She also posted in Just Engaged with her ring.

efmcc67

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_how-do-i-ask-my-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:8850b7a0-8230-4d35-9259-22ef47031383Post:b40d61a0-cf65-4fbc-aa00-c351fd2f1827">Re:How do I ask my bridesmaids?</a>:
[QUOTE]Has anyone noticed that OP had an AE in her name? I don't think she's a newb either.
Posted by misshart00[/QUOTE]



Yes. I just wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt.

misshart00

In Response to Re:How do I ask my bridesmaids?:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:How do I ask my bridesmaids?:Has anyone noticed that OP had an AE in her name? I don't think she's a newb either.Posted by misshart00

Yes. I just wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt. Posted by efmcc67[/QUOTE]

Well darn. OP, if you are still around and real, just ask them. Pretty much ditto Maggie on everything.

leia1979

If you live near your bridesmaids, how about taking them out to lunch or coffee or something? I took mine to a fancy tea, and it was a lot of fun. I think they already knew what was up, anyway.

OP, do you have a venue booked already? You don't really have a date until you have a venue. I waited to get that done before asking.

pArtyprincEss11

Leia1979, not yet. We just got engaged not that long ago so we are still looking. Taking them to lunch sounds like a good idea!

AUnicornExists

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_how-do-i-ask-my-bridesmaids?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:8850b7a0-8230-4d35-9259-22ef47031383Post:c19e0183-1ab0-4794-a1ba-0e40f3389572">Re: How do I ask my bridesmaids?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to How do I ask my bridesmaids? : For the bolded, you have some time yet. <strong>Just ask each girl individually.</strong> Also, with regards to dresses, please make sure to ask their budget first instead of just picking a dress you like. Also, he is your FIANCE, not Fiancee.
Posted by Stina51286[/QUOTE]

<div>I don't know, I am really trying to get all of my bridesmaids together to ask them at the same time. There always seems to be one girl who can't make it when everyone else can, so I think I'm just not going to ask her to be a bridesmaid.</div>

nycrose2013

All of these trolls have "A" "E" in their names. Methinks they are regs having a little april fools fun

Jen4948

Just ask the women in question without making a production out of it-no cute messages, poems, T shirts, parties, etc.  Doing those things would make it awkward for anyone who has to decline.