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I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...

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Re: I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...

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    ...And where did you go? Do any of these perfectly reasonable suggestions seem reasonable to you?
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    Ummm.  Most of my family got married in the afternoon with afternoon receptions.  ALL had full bars and dancing.  A lot of them had 3-5 course sit-down meals also.

    After working in the islands for 16 years, I can say that people DO drink and dance during the day.   I saw people doing it ALL.THE.TIME.


    Also my many years of attending college and pro-football games also prove people do party during the day.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-know-how-we-all-feel-about-long-gaps-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:5b81d47b-67b6-41d1-8051-d51a5feaaf8dPost:a5cabde2-3102-444e-8729-e8a5f9e9b093">Re: I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...</a>:
    [QUOTE]My wedding had a lunch reception. Is that more or less lame than brunch? 
    Posted by AddieL73[/QUOTE]

    Based on OP's logic, everything is lame unless it's evening. So I'd assume that a lunch reception is just as lame as a brunch.
    Anniversary
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    This whole wedding is one big NOPE to me.
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    I didn't have seating for all of my guests at my ceremony, and even I think your plan to make guests stand outside in February in Michigan on a ski slope is rude. Between that and the 8 hour gap, I think you should plan on no one but your parents showing up for the ceremony. The rest of your guests will drive in later that day for the reception probably. 
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    I think you should cancel your caterers and have your guests prepare the meal. That oughta keep them busy during your 8-hour gap. Oh, and don't provide the ingredients for the dinner. Let that be another little surprise for them, that they have to go shopping and pay for it as well. FUN! YOU-NEEK! SO NOT BORING! QUIRKY!
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-know-how-we-all-feel-about-long-gaps-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5b81d47b-67b6-41d1-8051-d51a5feaaf8dPost:57dcd396-b986-4ef4-b2d9-f0571b10091f">Re: I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception... : Based on OP's logic, everything is lame unless it's evening. So I'd assume that a lunch reception is just as lame as a brunch.
    Posted by Jessalyn2013[/QUOTE]
    Well, fluck. I was hoping I escaped lameness. C'est la vie. Back to my original question then. OP, what kind of shoes are you going to wear?<div>
    </div><div>
    </div>
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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    I don't understand why your belief that you're unique would excuse you from properly hosting your guests.  Oooh, I dress up in silly costumes sometimes!  I'm a special snowflake!  Having consideration for others is for conformist robots!
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-know-how-we-all-feel-about-long-gaps-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5b81d47b-67b6-41d1-8051-d51a5feaaf8dPost:fedc71cb-753b-48e8-8734-4819d7e39fb2">Re: I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception... : <strong>But a brunch reception is oh-so lame.</strong> <strong>Our families are full of partiers that would be completely unsatisfied with a brunch reception.</strong> My dream has been to ski down the aisle since I was a little girl. We're all a quirky bunch, and that's why FH and I mesh so well (so far this year we ran a race as IronWoman and SuperMan, wore green tuxes for St. Paddy's Day, and skied all day this past Saturday dressed as a zombie bride and groom for $5 off lift tickets).  I was most definitely not asking you guys to condone our gap because I know better than that. I was just asking for gap-things-to-do ideas. 
    Posted by wihltsabow[/QUOTE]

    OP, I take great offense to that statement. 

    I am having a brunch reception and guess what?  Its going to be flucking AWESOME! 

    So, tell me how satisfied your guests will be during your 8 hour gap?  Please come back and let us know.

    Get over your self.
    image


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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-know-how-we-all-feel-about-long-gaps-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:5b81d47b-67b6-41d1-8051-d51a5feaaf8dPost:721194ce-0fe9-4642-8bb9-737a5353e6c0">I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>But we honestly have no choice.</strong> <strong>Since we're getting married on a ski slope</strong>, the ceremony has to be at 9am so the slope can open at 10. It is a destination wedding so everyone attending will be OOT. <strong>We want</strong> an evening reception at the resort, so it will start at 5pm.  The resort has a multitude of things to do: downhill and cross-country skiing, snowshoeing, snow biking, a treasure hunt for kids, bonfires with s'mores, ice skating, a spa with massages and mani/pedis, indoor pool and hottub, outdoor hottub, and I'm sure I'm missing something. We are planning on having a party bus take a load of people to a large city that is 1/2 an hour away for 3 hours to do some shopping and lunch, or whatever they wanted.  I am perfectly fine with many coming only to the reception and not the ceremony, especially since we are inviting 300 and only 100 seats will fit on the slope, though I know a lot of my family will not come to the ceremony because of healthy issues. I'm just wondering if this is enough for people to do or if there is anything else I could possibly offer them. At least it will give them time to change out of snow gear and into formalwear, but we are talking an 8 hour gap. 
    Posted by wihltsabow[/QUOTE]


    The thing is, you DO have a choice. you are CHOOSING to get married on a ski slope where your only option is getting married at 9am. You are CHOOSING to have an evening reception, because you WANT it.  Not because there are no other options.

    You are being selfish and rude to your guests because you are CHOOSING to, not because the universe has no other options.
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    JoanE2012JoanE2012 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited April 2013
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-know-how-we-all-feel-about-long-gaps-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:5b81d47b-67b6-41d1-8051-d51a5feaaf8dPost:721194ce-0fe9-4642-8bb9-737a5353e6c0">I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...</a>:
    [QUOTE]But we honestly have no choice. Since we're getting married on a ski slope, the ceremony has to be at 9am so the slope can open at 10. It is a destination wedding so everyone attending will be OOT. We want an evening reception at the resort, so it will start at 5pm.  The resort has a multitude of things to do: downhill and cross-country skiing, snowshoeing, snow biking, a treasure hunt for kids, bonfires with s'mores, ice skating, a spa with massages and mani/pedis, indoor pool and hottub, outdoor hottub, and I'm sure I'm missing something. We are planning on having a party bus take a load of people to a large city that is 1/2 an hour away for 3 hours to do some shopping and lunch, or whatever they wanted.  I am perfectly fine with many coming only to the reception and not the ceremony, especially since we are inviting 300 and only 100 seats will fit on the slope, though I know a lot of my family will not come to the ceremony because of healthy issues. I'm just wondering if this is enough for people to do or if there is anything else I could possibly offer them. At least it will give them time to change out of snow gear and into formalwear, but we are talking an 8 hour gap. 
    Posted by wihltsabow[/QUOTE]

    Everything about this is rude.  No one is going to tell that to your face, of course.

    You DO have a choice.  You are choosing to do it your way. You obviously care more about yourself than you do for your friends and family. 
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    OP I completely understand why you're having your wedding at a ski resort....you clearly think you're a ohsospecial snowflake.
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    Can't you do the ceremony at the end of the day, when the ski hill closes???
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    To answer your question...if there was one? Don't give your guests a list of activities to do.
    In fact, don't invite guests at all. If you have your heart set on getting married at the top of a ski slope in the middle of winter, have a private ceremony (you, FI, parents). Throw a "party" later that night, not a wedding reception, just a party.

    Please don't expect your guests to STAND in the snow on a mountain in the middle of winter. So yes, please answer Addie- what kind of shoes are you going to wear?? What do you expect your guests to wear?

    And never assume that only 50% of you guest list will make it. If you are truly getting married in 2015, you should not be sending out invitations. Please take the time to find a venue that can accommodate ALL invited guests. Don't count on ones that "probably" won't make it.
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    I would have more than enough activities to do that day because I would do everthing BUT go to your wedding...
     Daisypath Anniversary tickers
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    OP there are other ways to better word things when it comes to what you want and dont. A lot of people here have had brunch receptions and while I am with you that that is something I'd never want, there are classier ways to convey that then saying it is oh so lame. You could have said "we dont prefer a brunch reception" or "that is not our tastes" but oh so lame?? Seriously grow up. The thing I have realised about posting on a national board as opposed to the one I used to post on that was a local one for Long Island where I live, is that people do things differently than maybe what you are used to in your area. Coming into this board in the beginning I couldnt believe people actually had small weddings, dry weddings, brunch receptions and no dancing. But different strokes for different folks so ya just gotta respect it. That said I have made some bad etiquette mistakes and got ripped to shreds here. It definitely made me feel awful so I want to avoid that happening to you, so you should listen to the advice given here bc its all correct. What you are doing is very very rude. If you want to get married at the ski slope, thats great, do it, but theres a rude way to do it and a classy polite way. Your wedding is not 100 percent about you so you need to think about the comfort and safety of your guests as well. Also I think your assumption that half your guest list will show up is wrong. I think if you are really inviting 300 or 500 or whatever it is, I think maybe a quarter of them will attend.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-know-how-we-all-feel-about-long-gaps-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:5b81d47b-67b6-41d1-8051-d51a5feaaf8dPost:1102aa35-1379-4709-b91d-eec71d0bf987">Re:I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...</a>:
    [QUOTE]OP there are other ways to better word things when it comes to what you want and dont. A lot of people here have had brunch receptions and while I am with you that that is something I'd never want, there are classier ways to convey that then saying it is oh so lame. You could have said "we dont prefer a brunch reception" or "that is not our tastes" but oh so lame?? Seriously grow up. The thing I have realised about posting on a national board as opposed to the one I used to post on that was a local one for Long Island where I live, is that people do things differently than maybe what you are used to in your area. Coming into this board in the beginning I couldnt believe people actually had small weddings, dry weddings, brunch receptions and no dancing. But different strokes for different folks so ya just gotta respect it. That said I have made some bad etiquette mistakes and got ripped to shreds here. It definitely made me feel awful so I want to avoid that happening to you, so you should listen to the advice given here bc its all correct. What you are doing is very very rude. If you want to get married at the ski slope, thats great, do it, but theres a rude way to do it and a classy polite way. Your wedding is not 100 percent about you so you need to think about the comfort and safety of your guests as well. Also I think your assumption that half your guest list will show up is wrong. I think if you are really inviting 300 or 500 or whatever it is,<strong> I think maybe a quarter of them will attend</strong>.
    Posted by OwningAHome1981[/QUOTE]

    It doesn't matter how many she "think" will attend. She needs to have space for everyone that is invited.
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    I'm thinking OP is doing brunches wrong if they are lame. Mimosas, woman! Mimosas!
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-know-how-we-all-feel-about-long-gaps-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5b81d47b-67b6-41d1-8051-d51a5feaaf8dPost:597ba4dd-e3a9-4749-a705-ee9ef6fee3bd">Re:I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm thinking OP is doing brunches wrong if they are lame. Mimosas, woman! Mimosas!
    Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

    Mimosas
    Bloody Mary's
    Mexican coffee
    Irish coffee
    screwdrivers
    tequila sunrises - what better for a sunrise ceremony than a tequila sunrise to accompany it!?
     Daisypath Anniversary tickers
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    In Response to Re:I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...:I'm thinking OP is doing brunches wrong if they are lame. Mimosas, woman! Mimosas!Posted by PeledreamsofrainMimosasBloody Mary's Mexican coffeeIrish coffeescrewdriverstequila sunrises what better for a sunrise ceremony than a tequila sunrise to accompany it!? Posted by sydaries[/QUOTE]

    I think I love you.
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-know-how-we-all-feel-about-long-gaps-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5b81d47b-67b6-41d1-8051-d51a5feaaf8dPost:597ba4dd-e3a9-4749-a705-ee9ef6fee3bd">Re:I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm thinking OP is doing brunches wrong if they are lame. Mimosas, woman! Mimosas!
    Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>Mmmm and Bloody Marys! I love me a good brunch Bloody Mary.</div>
    imageimage
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-know-how-we-all-feel-about-long-gaps-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:5b81d47b-67b6-41d1-8051-d51a5feaaf8dPost:57a579ca-f719-421b-9d8b-a93780a9edf9">Re:I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...: I think I love you.
    Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

    You're going to have to fight me for her!
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    In Response to Re:I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...:In Response to Re:I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...: I think I love you.Posted by PeledreamsofrainYou're going to have to fight me for her! Posted by
    lisabeats[/QUOTE]

    I already won Addie from Stage. It took toe wrestling pics, but I was victorious :p.
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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    edited August 2013
    Post removed due to GBCK
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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    Hmmmm cocktail mix-off?
     Daisypath Anniversary tickers
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    What Jessa said.
     Daisypath Anniversary tickers
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    I could enjoy a harem with the right people and if there will be cocktails, which it sounds like there will be. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_i-know-how-we-all-feel-about-long-gaps-between-ceremony-and-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:5b81d47b-67b6-41d1-8051-d51a5feaaf8dPost:acc5ee11-0319-400a-ab0a-3556d88a05d1">Re: I know how we all feel about long gaps between ceremony and reception...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I could enjoy a harem with the right people and if there will be cocktails, which it sounds like there will be. 
    Posted by AddieL73[/QUOTE]

    <img style="background-color:#fff;width:418px;height:211px;" class="mainImage" src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mcov91ExTp1rooeh4o1_500.gif" alt="" />
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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