Wedding Etiquette Forum

acceptable shower gift

I am going to a bridal shower tomorrow.  The girl who it is for is a friend of both me and my husband, we hang out with her and her fiance every few months, and she was invited to my bridal shower last year.  Is a gift in the $50 range acceptable? I don't want to come across as cheap. I'm nervous that her MOH might say something because the shower is at a nice restaurant, and i'm sure she is putting a lot of money into it.  This is the same MOH who insists on the cowgirl themed bachelorette party for a rediculous price that I had to bow out of because I simply wasn't able to afford.

Tell me i'm being crazy to even worry about this!

Re: acceptable shower gift

  • Whatever you are comfortable getting, and can afford is fine. Whether it's a $5 spatula, or a $400 vacuum cleaner. Don't feel like you need to compete with this girl to get her approval.  Are you in the wedding? Or just being included in things such as the bach. party. If you are and you had to bow out of the bach. party just because the MOH wants something out of your budget, I'd have a talk about that. Those types of parties and plans should be discussed to try and accommodate every bridal party members budget, time frame, ect.
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  • I'm getting a $50 gift for a shower I'm going to in a couple of weeks. I think it's more than generous. Don't worry about the MOH (and certainly don't feel a "pay for your plate" sort of pressure, since that's bogus)
    photo a826c490-726a-4824-af5c-d938878de228_zpseb85bb5a.jpg
  • $50 is actually my standard unless it is a close friend or family member.

    I just noticed she attended your shower. I know these things are not tit for tat, but I personally would try to spend a bit more if she bought you a $100+ gift. It's not necessary though.

    I wouldn't even factor the MOH into it. No matter what you bring, it is none of her business.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_acceptable-shower-gift?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:6e0ef15d-2c65-41d9-ac9c-09ae9c95343cPost:c6178809-f0e8-42d7-b550-9347c0e5d8b8">acceptable shower gift</a>:
    [QUOTE]I am going to a bridal shower tomorrow.  The girl who it is for is a friend of both me and my husband, we hang out with her and her fiance every few months, and she was invited to my bridal shower last year.  Is a gift in the $50 range acceptable? I don't want to come across as cheap. I'm nervous that her MOH might say something because the shower is at a nice restaurant, and i'm sure she is putting a lot of money into it.  This is the same MOH who insists on the cowgirl themed bachelorette party for a rediculous price that I had to bow out of because I simply wasn't able to afford. Tell me i'm being crazy to even worry about this!
    Posted by kaos16[/QUOTE]

    that is plenty
    image   imageimage
    You'll never be subject to a cash bar, gap, potluck wedding, or b-list if you marry a Muppet Overlord.

  • @TXKristan, I am absolutely using a coupon, I have a stash. . . it's silly not to at that place.

    @AndreaJulia- she was invited, but wasn't able to attend my shower.  I was going to use that as a basis for comparison (although I know it's not tit for tat)

    @teachmegs1- I am not in the bridal party.  This girl is someone who I actually know through my husband, he has known her for many years.  I only met her when I began dating him.  If I was in the bridal party, we'd have words. . . between the MOH and her price ranges and the requirement for pricey hair and makeup for the wedding.

    I don't know why this is such a tough one for me, because i'm usually not concerned about what people think of me or my gifts but there is something about this MOH that is making me this way.  It's kind of obnoxious!
  • $50 is my go-to shower gift price also.  I actually just planned to go in on a gift together with a friend for a shower tomorrow and she mentioned it's her normal budget too.  and we're both DINKs, so if she thinks you're cheap then we're totally cheap also.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_acceptable-shower-gift?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:6e0ef15d-2c65-41d9-ac9c-09ae9c95343cPost:c6178809-f0e8-42d7-b550-9347c0e5d8b8">acceptable shower gift</a>:
    [QUOTE]I am going to a bridal shower tomorrow.  The girl who it is for is a friend of both me and my husband, we hang out with her and her fiance every few months, and she was invited to my bridal shower last year.  Is a gift in the $50 range acceptable? I don't want to come across as cheap. I'm nervous that her MOH might say something because the shower is at a nice restaurant, and i'm sure she is putting a lot of money into it.  This is the same MOH who insists on the cowgirl themed bachelorette party for a rediculous price that I had to bow out of because I simply wasn't able to afford. Tell me i'm being crazy to even worry about this!
    Posted by kaos16[/QUOTE]

    I think 50.00 is perfectly acceptable.
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