Early on, I made the mistake of trying to dictate what my parents were going to wear color-wise. I ordered them not to wear black. I quickly realized how stupid that was, apologized, and told them that they would wear whatever they wanted. I want them to wear whatever makes them feel good.
Well, my mom ran with it and has bought six outfits that she'll be choosing from in the weeks leading up to the wedding.
This is now stressing my dad out, because he still hasn't decided on an outfit, he VERY rarely dresses up, and our groomsmen are't wearing tuxes. So he's worried that he'll look silly in a tux when our groomsmen are in suits and our wedding isn't terribly formal. I told him it wasn't a big deal, I'd love to see him in a tux, but ha ha maybe not tails, right Dad? Ha ha? And of course, I learned that he had really wanted to wear a jacket with tails. Open mouth, insert foot. He asks if a white dinner jacket would look nice, and if I'd be upset if he wore white. I said absolutely not, that would look great! The white would match my dress well, since my dress is white, not ivory, and it would look nice in pictures. Insert foot again - he actually wanted an ivory dinner jacket, not a white one. So now he's freaked out about clashing with my dress in our walking-down-the-aisle photos if he wears the jacket he wants, and that he'd look like a maitre d' if he wore tails.
I feel awful that I nixed his two favorite outfit ideas, but I know that there are so many more options out there that he'd look great in. And he keeps coming to me for advice and asking for guidance - what kind of suit, what colors, bow tie or neck tie, etc. Do I stay out of it and just tell him "wear what you want" so I stop saying stupid things? Do I give him the guidance that he wants?
And because I just don't know - would an ivory dinner jacket and a white wedding gown look okay together in pictures?