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Wedding Invitation Wording

Ok, so I know that the correct etiquette is to send a separate invitation for every household but I am in a unique situation. I have a very large extended family (90 cousins on my mothers side) who have a strong sense of the importance of family and so could get offended if they are not invited, but for whom it would be extremely difficult to find all of their manes addresses, and living situations, not to mention the added expense of printing and sending out all those extra invites. I've discussed this with one of my aunts who is very conscious both of correct etiquette and the dynamics of my particular family and she agrees that it is best in my particular situation to send out invites to the main families (all my aunts and uncles) and just be sure to make it clear that their entire family, even those not currently living with them, are included in the invitation. My question is what is the best way for me to word the invitation to ensure it is clear that it includes those not living in the same house? If you just say "and family" that normally only refers to family within the same house and I would not want them to mistakenly assume their older children are not invited. Thoughts? Advice?

Re: Wedding Invitation Wording

  • You certainly know your family better than we do, but I question how important these people can be to you if you don't know their name and addresses.

    But to answer your question, I would address the outer envelope:
    The Mr. Uncle's Firstname Lastname Family

    And then the inner envelope:
    Uncle Firstname
    Aunt Firstname
    Oldest Cousin Firstname and guest
    Second-oldest Cousin Firstname and guest

    And so on, for however many cousins there are. Always list oldest to youngest.

    I say 'and guest' even though that's kind of rude because it doesn't sound like you know them well enough to know if they're dating/engaged/married/living with someone and you can't invite them with their SO.

    Good luck!

    I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'
  • tdredtdred member
    10 Comments Name Dropper
    Thanks for your advice. :)

    As for them not being close enough to send an invitation... well, they are not currently very close, but not because we have hung out and had problems, rather because of other life circumstances (mostly living very far apart) we have not been able to get to know each other. I want to make sure they understand that since they are family I would love to get to know them better and that they are welcome to become a part of my life if the opportunity ever arises. So even though I am not expecting the majority of them to come (again because of distance issues) I want to invite them to make sure they understand that I would love to have them be a part of my life if the opportunity ever arises. And if they did all decide to come in the end (extremely unlikely) I would be fine with that too, I'd just need to make a few adjustments to my catering and rentals. 
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