How to handle family member wanting to bring their baby

Maggie0829

PrettyGirlLost said:

Maggie0829 said:

@PrettyGirlLost - I like being on the same page!  My brain is a bit fuzzy today so I was afraid that I wasn't explaining what I was trying to say well enough

No, no, no.  I think my post came off as more argumentative to yours, rather than conversational.

LOL!  I was thinking the same thing but rather mine was being more argumentative then conversational.  Oh geeze, this is where non-verbal communication would come in handy!

harper0813

I don't understand how it's okay to expect "family tradition" to dictate a wedding. If I had followed my "family traditions", I would have let my DH pull my garter off with his teeth so that my uncles could wrestle over it. We would have had a cash bar. And I would have marched from table to table so that people could stuff money in an apron tied around my waist.

To be honest, this cousins's wife's terribleness sounds like MUD - an excuse to feel personally attacked.

I had an uncle not attend our wedding because he wanted his grown daughter invited. I am not close to his grown daughter and have not seen her in over a decade. Moreover, she did not want to come and had plans to work at a festival that weekend. However, he was so offended by the idea that we didn't invite her that he called her and said she was forbidden from working the festival and then called my dad and stated their meal choices - and said he would not come without her. My dad, having already spoken to this cousin's much older half-sister (who we do know well), knew the story but he was ready to cave. I told him absolutely not - that he's giving his twin brother the opportunity to walk all over him and take advantage or his hospitality.

Neither uncle (not cousin, obviously) came to the wedding and we were much happier for it.

You don't get to decide who they invite. I'm sorry.

PrettyGirlLost

Maggie0829 said:

PrettyGirlLost said:

Maggie0829 said:

@PrettyGirlLost - I like being on the same page!  My brain is a bit fuzzy today so I was afraid that I wasn't explaining what I was trying to say well enough

No, no, no.  I think my post came off as more argumentative to yours, rather than conversational.

LOL!  I was thinking the same thing but rather mine was being more argumentative then conversational.  Oh geeze, this is where non-verbal communication would come in handy!

Maggie0829

I love me some Harry Potter gifs!

ceceibson

I've posted the same thing on other related threads, but....

I don't understand why one would feel insulted that her children were not invited to an event of any sort, wedding or otherwise.  

We included children in our wedding.  We have 12 between us, ranging in age from 3 to 42.  We invited families with children because our friends are families with children.  We had around 180 people at our wedding [open bar, etc. by the way : )  ]

My niece had a beautiful wedding in Florida last spring.  Adults only [the invitation didn't say this, it was simply addressed to DH and me only].  I lined up care for the children we still have at home and my husband and I enjoyed a lovely 4 day trip to Florida.  It's that simple.

If I didn't want to leave my children behind, I would decline the invitation.  But whether or not I do is on me, not the couple hosting the wedding.  

Maggie0829

ceceibson said:

I've posted the same thing on other related threads, but....

I don't understand why one would feel insulted that her children were not invited to an event of any sort, wedding or otherwise.  

We included children in our wedding.  We have 12 between us, ranging in age from 3 to 42.  We invited families with children because our friends are families with children.  We had around 180 people at our wedding [open bar, etc. by the way : )  ]

My niece had a beautiful wedding in Florida last spring.  Adults only [the invitation didn't say this, it was simply addressed to DH and me only].  I lined up care for the children we still have at home and my husband and I enjoyed a lovely 4 day trip to Florida.  It's that simple.

If I didn't want to leave my children behind, I would decline the invitation.  But whether or not I do is on me, not the couple hosting the wedding.  

Because there are some parents who feel that their child is so fucking special that they cannot imagine why people would not want to include him/her in the festivities.  They also believe that the child should be allowed to go anywhere for anything.

But what those parents don't know is that child of theirs is not special to everyone it is only special to those who know the child and know the family.  I have a few acquaintances who recently have had kids.  Good for them but don't expect me to be okay with you bringing little junior to every fucking thing in the world.  I am not a fan of kids and just because I know you and you have one does not mean that my feelings about kids will change.  Will I deal with your kid being around, sure, but to assume that the child is welcomed everywhere is ridiculous and self-absorbed.