CONFESSIONS

queenofhearts1728

minskat30 said:

I confess that I feel like a cow.  My H is so hot and I'm bloated (thanks, Aunt Flow...combined with too much salt), eating cheese and drinking wine already...I actually think that is three more confessions.  At least my hair looks nice today. 

I confess that I can't wait until someone else on the board who is TTC gets pregnant...I confess that there are days I want to (even though we are waiting for babies) and days where sometimes I dread giving up wine, sleeping in, etc.

I confess that I look at Weddingbee sometimes to read about all the drama, bad advice, etc.  It is like watching a car wreck and I can't stop.  I could never post there...I'd be booted in a heartbeat.

 

ooo, i might have to do this. when I'm bored and no one is posting here I go off in search of drama posts to keep myself entertained.

minskat30

queenofhearts1728 said:

minskat30 said:

I confess that I feel like a cow.  My H is so hot and I'm bloated (thanks, Aunt Flow...combined with too much salt), eating cheese and drinking wine already...I actually think that is three more confessions.  At least my hair looks nice today. 

I confess that I can't wait until someone else on the board who is TTC gets pregnant...I confess that there are days I want to (even though we are waiting for babies) and days where sometimes I dread giving up wine, sleeping in, etc.

I confess that I look at Weddingbee sometimes to read about all the drama, bad advice, etc.  It is like watching a car wreck and I can't stop.  I could never post there...I'd be booted in a heartbeat.

 

ooo, i might have to do this. when I'm bored and no one is posting here I go off in search of drama posts to keep myself entertained.

Once you start, you can't stop...trust me.  Good Lord, I was just reading a thread about this chick who is complaining about her future brother in law macking on her bridesmaids/friends and how she is "fuming" that he is "pushing her buttons".  Dude, don't cock block.    

skepticals

motoLyn said:

@princesstinyfeet, my advice to you in regards to marine biology, if you chose to go this route and not end up academia, INTERN and VOLUNTEER as much as you can!  School and experience counts for a lot.  My B.S. is in Marine Biology and I have a M.S. in environmental studies.  Before I went to graduate school I worked at aquariums and from what I saw of hiring and qualifications from big and small places is that they ask of a good deal of experience.  So take advantage of intern programs and volunteer in their aquarist or husbandry programs.  My big dream was to work at the Monterrey Bay Aquarium.  Unfortunately I didn't quite make it that far North.  I love working in the ocean, I also suggest working for the government if you can swing it NOAA and EPA as well CA Fish and Game have great positions, but once again it comes down to education and more important experience. 

Thanks for the advice, sounds like you know what youre talking about! Where did you go for your B.S.? Any advice on good schools?

motoLyn

PrincessTinyFeet said:

 

Thanks for the advice, sounds like you know what youre talking about! Where did you go for your B.S.? Any advice on good schools?

MY B.S. is from University or California Los Angeles, GOOOOOO BRUINS!  In regards to good schools, are you looking to go public or private?  What are you budgeting for?  UCSD has the La Jolla Institute nearby and can be of good experience and the zoos and Sea World are just around the corner.  UCSC has their own marine center for research purposes and the Bodega Bay Marine Labs just north or there.  I applied to the University of Hawaii and got in and was thinking of going there before my senior year English teacher convinced me to go to UCLA.  UCSB also has a great marine program I met some coworkers who graduated from there.  I also think Milton Love has a lab there and he's a well known rock fish biologist. 

This field is something of a must love cause it doesn't pay all that much.  Unless you become a professor or working for a private sector environmental firm.  The government positions pay ok, but then you have to deal with government budgets and not sure how one advances within the dept. 

Peaseblossom55

I'm late to the game.  I confess I'm not working out and eating a lot and I feel fat and untoned.  I feel so incredibly stressed between studying for these tests and wedding planning and keeping up with other life obligations I feel spread rather thin.  Luckily I'm so excited about my job only 4 days left at my old job.

I confess sometimes the wedding planning stuff gets so overwhelming.  I was looking for hotel blocks today and the person was like are you doing welcome bags....ugh.. it's nine months away I haven't thought about that yet....

suzie211

I confess I have an interwebs crush on @minskat30 and think we need to get moving on that Chicago GTG:)

skepticals

motoLyn said:

PrincessTinyFeet said:

 

Thanks for the advice, sounds like you know what youre talking about! Where did you go for your B.S.? Any advice on good schools?

MY B.S. is from University or California Los Angeles, GOOOOOO BRUINS!  In regards to good schools, are you looking to go public or private?  What are you budgeting for?  UCSD has the La Jolla Institute nearby and can be of good experience and the zoos and Sea World are just around the corner.  UCSC has their own marine center for research purposes and the Bodega Bay Marine Labs just north or there.  I applied to the University of Hawaii and got in and was thinking of going there before my senior year English teacher convinced me to go to UCLA.  UCSB also has a great marine program I met some coworkers who graduated from there.  I also think Milton Love has a lab there and he's a well known rock fish biologist. 

This field is something of a must love cause it doesn't pay all that much.  Unless you become a professor or working for a private sector environmental firm.  The government positions pay ok, but then you have to deal with government budgets and not sure how one advances within the dept. 

Im thinking of a UC, so UCSB or UCSC sound like the best options for me. If I could just marry my tech work to marine bio, I think id be very happy. Marine Bio was my very favorite academic class in high school, I think im just doomed to love jobs with little pay!

KeptInStitches

@bethsmiles, @queenofhearts1728, @amapola14 - Thanks for a place to get that out of my system. Much healthier than the last way I dealt with those feelings.

bride2b71614

I confess that I have been avoiding doing homework, and making more cakes than I should. I confess eating all the food in the house, and spending more money on food than usual. I confess that I am two weeks late, and that I am too scared to take a pregnancy test. I confess that I have a spending problem, and cannot budget for shit. I think those are all the confessions I can handle at this point. 

psychbabe314

@bride2b71614 - jeez! sounds stressful :-( Hopefully everything gets solved soon!

skepticals

bride2b71614 said:

I confess that I have been avoiding doing homework, and making more cakes than I should. I confess eating all the food in the house, and spending more money on food than usual. I confess that I am two weeks late, and that I am too scared to take a pregnancy test. I confess that I have a spending problem, and cannot budget for shit. I think those are all the confessions I can handle at this point. 

I can imagine you might be very scared to get those kinds of results, but either you are or you arent. The problem wont go away if you ignore it, its best to know as early as possible. Good luck!

500days

I confess that while talking about general ideas or possible timelines for a wedding with FI, he said that he wanted to be married at 30 (he's 29 now) when I suggested a long engagement. I confess that I told him that that's really stupid.

bride2b71614

@psychbabe314, thank you, I hope it does too. @princesstinyfeet, Its a 50/50 chance, and you are right, I need to do it sooner than later. Still one of those things that I don't want to do, but have to. I just hate this because I am careful, used two forms of bc, and still messed up. I don't want to go to the school practitioner because I am worried about her passing judgment, and I don't have friends to turn to in Pittsburgh. That being said, I'm getting off the computer and going to the drug store right now. Wish me luck. 

Edit: I spoke with my FI briefly before going to the drug store. He was aware that I was late and thought it was due to stress. I took the test and both tests came out positive (I bought two because I wanted to be 100% sure). I have NO idea what to do, and my FI and I have no idea where to go from here. He is just as freaked out as I am, and said that he will support me no matter what decision I make. I need to consider my options as of now, and figure out what would be best for my emotional wellbeing, for the fetus (I don't want to call it a baby because I have options right now), and whether this is the right time for us to parent. I am going to the doctor to get a blood test done, and maybe an ultrasound? Is it too early to get an ultrasound? I am clueless, if anyone has any knowledge on pregnancy or about their personal experiences with a similar situation, please pm me.  Sorry for bringing this up. I feel like shit. 

CLoGreenEyes

@bride2be71614, just wow. *hugs* I don't have any grand sage advice, other than to go see your doctor, have it confirmed, and see what your options are. I do think it's too early for ultrasound but don't quote me because I'm not 100% sure. But you do have some time to think about it and make a good decision for everyone involved. I'm glad your FI is being supportive, and I just wish you guys the best no matter what you end up deciding.

psychbabe314

@bride2be71614 - it is probably going to a rough few weeks while you figure things out. I am not sure if it is too early for an ultrasound either, but I believe that they can go as early as 6-10 weeks. But, I would say you should start taking folic acid, just to keep your options open. I take it every day just in-case something ever happens on my end. Good thoughts you way though!

bride2b71614

@Amapola14 I appreciate the advice, and it didn't need to be of grand sage quality because it helped, and that's whats important. I want to a doctor that isn't affiliated with the health center, so I have to scout some doctors right now and figure it out. I have my FI to help with that.  I am thankful that I can tell people this and not get judged (even if its over the internet), and I will keep you updated when I find out more information.

CLoGreenEyes

@bride2b71614, girl. Ain't nothing to judge.

bethsmiles

@bride2b71614 - *hugs* I'm sure this is really scary and stressful but you're gonna get through this and be fine no matter what option you decide on. And you know you can come here to vent, talk, cry, whatever you need

bride2b71614

@psychbabe314, I started looking up pregnancy online and it appears to be one big collective of not allowed tos. I've also checked out a few mommy blogs, which are comical yet informative. A lot of websites stress taking folic acid, and prenatal vitamin packs. Probably should get on that ASAP. At least I found out over the weekend where I have time to research rather than let it affect my weekday. 

bride2b71614

@bethsmiles, I'm probably going to be doing a lot of that in the next few weeks thank you for the support, its really appreciated. 

CASK85

@bride2b71614 - if someone (online or IRL) judges you for getting pregnant from having sex with your fiance they can go take a long walk off a short cliff. Did you say you took a p-test yet? Regardless of what you decide to do if it is positive, I absolutely 100% support your decision. But in order to give yourself the most options I'd stay off the booze and start taking vitamins asap. *hugs*

ETA: reading fail on my part. seriously, 100% support whatever you decide to do.

Blackbird230

I confess I'm dreading fall jeans season because I've gained like 10 pounds.

I confess that I'm kind of angry with my friends because for some reason they've connected having my boyfriend staying with me for the weekend mean I'm not available to hang out at all.

bride2b71614

I don't drink, so I have that going for me. In a panic, my FI skyped his cousin (who he was close to). The cousin is also engaged, and has had some issues in the past. My FI spoke with him and told him about our situation. I managed to over hear his cousin say, good job knocking up the crazy bitch, I take it back the kids probably not even yours. Better "take care of it" while you still can. FI then started cursing his cousin out and said that he isn't allowed near me, or our wedding. @cshiano, if only I could direct his cousin to this cliff. The cousin made it worse because as soon as he  got off skype he FI's side of the family.  My FI is at the academy tonight, he's on duty which is not helpful right now. A good thing thats come out of this in terms of in real life interaction, is our med student neighbor whose concentration is in obgyn. She heard me crying due to my FI's cousin, and decided to check in on us to make sure we were okay.  Her resident is really friendly, and my neighbor has pulled a few strings to get me an appointment with her on Monday (I think my neighbor might be there observing...could be awkward but I am thankful either way). I love that everyone is so kind here. I'm still waiting to hear my FIs mother's response, I really don't know how she's going to take it...

ETA: Just got a call from my FMIL (aka momma bear).  She's in shock it took her a while to get her words out. She said that she supports us. If we wanted to parent, she's always wanted grandbabies. She said that if we chose an alternative option, she'd understand, but ultimately it was up to me. I guess thats the best response I could have gotten from her at this point. Not pushing it further. 

skepticals

bride2b71614 said:

I don't drink, so I have that going for me. In a panic, my FI skyped his cousin (who he was close to). The cousin is also engaged, and has had some issues in the past. My FI spoke with him and told him about our situation. I managed to over hear his cousin say, good job knocking up the crazy bitch, I take it back the kids probably not even yours. Better "take care of it" while you still can. FI then started cursing his cousin out and said that he isn't allowed near me, or our wedding. @cshiano, if only I could direct his cousin to this cliff. The cousin made it worse because as soon as he  got off skype he FI's side of the family.  My FI is at the academy tonight, he's on duty which is not helpful right now. A good thing thats come out of this in terms of in real life interaction, is our med student neighbor whose concentration is in obgyn. She heard me crying due to my FI's cousin, and decided to check in on us to make sure we were okay.  Her resident is really friendly, and my neighbor has pulled a few strings to get me an appointment with her on Monday (I think my neighbor might be there observing...could be awkward but I am thankful either way). I love that everyone is so kind here. I'm still waiting to hear my FIs mother's response, I really don't know how she's going to take it...

Im so sorry this is all happening, and I wish you the best. You have to do whats best for you. Think long and hard on what you feel is the right choice, Im sure youll get past this hurdle.

bride2b71614

@Kait, find an awesome pair of flattering jeans! The size won't matter at all, as long as the jeans accentuate you in all the right places. I'd rather be a large size and rocking the hell out of my jeans than trying to squeeze into a small size that makes me look like crap. But hey, thats just me. 

bethsmiles

@bride2b71614 - Wow! Your FI's cousin is an ass! I'm glad your FI stood up for you

bride2b71614

I am glad my FI stood up for me. I called my mom, and told her what happened. She was upset at first but came to the conclusion that she's okay with whatever decision I make. She asked if I wanted financial help from her for the first few years of the child's life, and I didn't know how to respond. I have a lot to consider. I went outside in the communal court yard in the center of our complex, so it helped a lot to get some fresh air. I know that my FI is coming home soon, and I hope he has ice cream and a rom com movie. I hope he will come to my drs appointment too. Otherwise I am going to be a nervous wreck. I'll keep you updated.

psychbabe314

@bride2b71614 - Wow... your FI's cousin...but, I am glad that your mom is so supportive. It is helpful when the people closest to you are willing to support any decision you make.

Hummingbird125

@bride2b71614 - Good luck with your doctor's appointment tomorrow. I can't imagine what's going through your head right now, but you sound like a smart, level-headed person, and I'm sure you'll make all the right decisions for yourself.

minskat30

@suzie211 - Right back at ya.    Now that you are back from your Honeymoon let's plan it.  I'll put together a seperate post!