Drunk at wedding

phira

Honestly, I'll be pretty upset if my partner gets drunk at our wedding. He constantly forgets that when he's slept badly and when he hasn't been eating, he gets very drunk and then very sick. He also forgets that, when that happens, he's got some ... ahem BEDROOM TROUBLES.

I'm not planning on drinking beyond a glass of champagne because I'm on meds that prevent me from having more than 1 drink per night.

daveANDkristen

grumbledore said:

Fine line for me. Drunk and acting trashy - ew. Drinking and having fun, awesome.

I'm glad someone said this

I was happily buzzed, DH was happily drunk.  He wasn't falling all over himself or anything, but I definitely do wish he hadn't had so much to drink.

Maybe it's just because I'm a drinker and most everyone in our crowd is, but I don't have a problem with a bit of drinking on your wedding day.  You certainly shouldn't get so drunk that you can't remember it though! 

AllyIdo

At my first wedding I think I had one glass of champagne all night (to my dismay). We were so busy. We barely ate either.

Second time around... small group in Las Vegas. I can't be held responsible for what happens that night!

itzMS

We come from a party crowd, so it doesn't really bother me.

I don't think either DH or I were "drunk" at our wedding...but we were so flippin exhausted by the end of the night that we probably looked absolutely smashed. This is exactly why we planned to have our photographer sent home shortly after dinner. No photo documentation. :-)

loves2shop4shoes

Yes.

climbingsingle

I personally don't care if a b&g are drunk at their wedding. Do what makes you happy. I was drunk at my first wedding, but that was most likely because I knew I was marrying the wrong person. I plan to get a tad tipsy at my wedding. Just enough to have fun, not enough that I won't remember. 

IMO, what's really tacky is getting fall down drunk if you're a guest at someone's wedding.  

emmyg65

We also come from a partying crowd (and family), so I don't really care. My new brother-in-law kept bringing me champagne, so I got comfortably fun drunk, but nowhere near sloppy. My husband stayed stone-cold sober because he had a cold.

SewInLoveWithDMB

In general, I think overdoing it on alcohol is never a good thing. It's fine to enjoy drinks responsibly and have a good time, but past a certain age, it's never cute.

bullfrogmama

SewInLoveWithDMB said:

In general, I think overdoing it on alcohol is never a good thing. It's fine to enjoy drinks responsibly and have a good time, but past a certain age, it's never cute.

Serious question. What age is that? Because drunkass 20-somethings are not cute. They are obnoxious (I know, I was one). So, pre-20's might be cute? Lol (I'm kidding, obviously). I just never think of "cute" when I think of drinking. I think of having a good time... 

SewInLoveWithDMB

Yeh - I agree it isn't cute then either. Cute was used for lack of a better word. I was thinking more along the lines of people drink in college and have a higher chance of abusing it and can 'get away with it' better. After that, getting drunk should be less frequent.

Drinking at 21 with college friends and being obnoxious can be forgiven more than when it happens when someone is an older adult with responsibilities (such as a full time job the next day or children.)

banana468

I also echo it's in how you act. My dad had at least 10 Heinekens and while he was affected, he was happy and was not a jackass. My cousin's (now) ex wife was so drunk I think she started her day with Baily's in her cereal instead of milk.

grumbledore

daveANDkristen said:

grumbledore said:

Fine line for me. Drunk and acting trashy - ew. Drinking and having fun, awesome.

I'm glad someone said this

I was happily buzzed, DH was happily drunk.  He wasn't falling all over himself or anything, but I definitely do wish he hadn't had so much to drink.

Maybe it's just because I'm a drinker and most everyone in our crowd is, but I don't have a problem with a bit of drinking on your wedding day.  You certainly shouldn't get so drunk that you can't remember it though! 

I think this is definitely a consideration.  Pretty much our entire crowd are drinkers (not drunks, but social drinkers) including family - so not only will it be okay to get a little tipsy, it will be expected.

That said, our bartender will have a gentle warning from me to keep an eye on my SO because he can get obnoxious if he overdoes it and that would suck.  But this is very rare so as long as people aren't shoveling drinks down his throat, he'll be fine.

Drinking so much you can't remember would just be depressing.  I can't even imagine.

daveANDkristen

grumbledore said:

daveANDkristen said:

grumbledore said:

Fine line for me. Drunk and acting trashy - ew. Drinking and having fun, awesome.

I'm glad someone said this

I was happily buzzed, DH was happily drunk.  He wasn't falling all over himself or anything, but I definitely do wish he hadn't had so much to drink.

Maybe it's just because I'm a drinker and most everyone in our crowd is, but I don't have a problem with a bit of drinking on your wedding day.  You certainly shouldn't get so drunk that you can't remember it though! 

I think this is definitely a consideration.  Pretty much our entire crowd are drinkers (not drunks, but social drinkers) including family - so not only will it be okay to get a little tipsy, it will be expected.

That said, our bartender will have a gentle warning from me to keep an eye on my SO because he can get obnoxious if he overdoes it and that would suck.  But this is very rare so as long as people aren't shoveling drinks down his throat, he'll be fine.

Drinking so much you can't remember would just be depressing.  I can't even imagine.

I wish I had done this (though IDK if they would have listened and denied the groom anything!).  DH was drunk, there is no denying it.  Everyone was doing shots with him and he was lifted up on the dancefloor.  Like maggie said, it was a party environment, which is what we wanted.  I'm so glad that DH enjoyed himself at our reception (but I do wish that he was a little less intoxicated... it wasn't the most romantic of evenings...).

Maggie0829

grumbledore said:

daveANDkristen said:

grumbledore said:

Fine line for me. Drunk and acting trashy - ew. Drinking and having fun, awesome.

I'm glad someone said this

I was happily buzzed, DH was happily drunk.  He wasn't falling all over himself or anything, but I definitely do wish he hadn't had so much to drink.

Maybe it's just because I'm a drinker and most everyone in our crowd is, but I don't have a problem with a bit of drinking on your wedding day.  You certainly shouldn't get so drunk that you can't remember it though! 

I think this is definitely a consideration.  Pretty much our entire crowd are drinkers (not drunks, but social drinkers) including family - so not only will it be okay to get a little tipsy, it will be expected.

That said, our bartender will have a gentle warning from me to keep an eye on my SO because he can get obnoxious if he overdoes it and that would suck.  But this is very rare so as long as people aren't shoveling drinks down his throat, he'll be fine.

Drinking so much you can't remember would just be depressing.  I can't even imagine.

I wish I had done this (though IDK if they would have listened and denied the groom anything!).  DH was drunk, there is no denying it.  Everyone was doing shots with him and he was lifted up on the dancefloor.  Like maggie said, it was a party environment, which is what we wanted.  I'm so glad that DH enjoyed himself at our reception (but I do wish that he was a little less intoxicated... it wasn't the most romantic of evenings...).

I wasn't going to have the bartender limit H but even if I had wanted him to keep an eye on him he wouldn't have been able to. H, I think, got himself one drink all the night. The rest of the night his friends were handing him drink after drink (and shot after shot) so there was no way for the bartender to really know. And yeah our wedding night was the furthest thing from romantic, but I was expecting that no matter what. I knew that I was going to be tired as all hell and that in no way was I going to be in the mood for anything other then pure sleep. Also, I didn't get mad at H because 1) it was hilarious and 2) I knew the next morning for him was going to be punishment enough.

harper0813

We had a guest (around 30 years old) get drunk enough to think it was okay to stick his hand up his wife's skirt on the dance floor, and she let him, in plain sight of everyone. I really hope they're not in any of our professional photos, because ew.

daveANDkristen

Maggie0829 said:

I wasn't going to have the bartender limit H but even if I had wanted him to keep an eye on him he wouldn't have been able to. H, I think, got himself one drink all the night. The rest of the night his friends were handing him drink after drink (and shot after shot) so there was no way for the bartender to really know. And yeah our wedding night was the furthest thing from romantic, but I was expecting that no matter what. I knew that I was going to be tired as all hell and that in no way was I going to be in the mood for anything other then pure sleep. Also, I didn't get mad at H because 1) it was hilarious and 2) I knew the next morning for him was going to be punishment enough.

All o' this

SJM7538

grumbledore said:

daveANDkristen said:

grumbledore said:

Fine line for me. Drunk and acting trashy - ew. Drinking and having fun, awesome.

I'm glad someone said this

I was happily buzzed, DH was happily drunk.  He wasn't falling all over himself or anything, but I definitely do wish he hadn't had so much to drink.

Maybe it's just because I'm a drinker and most everyone in our crowd is, but I don't have a problem with a bit of drinking on your wedding day.  You certainly shouldn't get so drunk that you can't remember it though! 

I think this is definitely a consideration.  Pretty much our entire crowd are drinkers (not drunks, but social drinkers) including family - so not only will it be okay to get a little tipsy, it will be expected.

That said, our bartender will have a gentle warning from me to keep an eye on my SO because he can get obnoxious if he overdoes it and that would suck.  But this is very rare so as long as people aren't shoveling drinks down his throat, he'll be fine.

Drinking so much you can't remember would just be depressing.  I can't even imagine.

I have to say that I'm really glad someone said this. My FI rarely over does it but sometimes depending on what he is drinking or if he is with his friends and they are shoveling drinks down his throat he doesn't realize how drunk he actually is. I'll admit this happens to me to from time to time, the drinks just catch up with you at a certain point. Its like you have a good buzz going and then BAM, you're drunk. And when it does happen the night gets fuzzy.

 

There was a thread a while back, I'm talking probably like a year or so, where a bride was trying to prevent her fiance from golfing the morning before the wedding because his family was in town and she was afraid he would get drunk before the ceremony. A lot of people disagreed with her but I agreed with her and said I would probably request that my fiance not golf before the wedding because sometimes when he's with his friends they tend to drink too much. I just thought it was weird that I was in the minority on that. The bolded part just reminded  me of that for some reason.

 

With that said, I plan to limit myself on my wedding day because I would like to remember it and not make an ass of myself.

FutureMrsN3312

misssunshine17 said:

I think there's a fine line. Buzzed and having the time of your life? Fabulous. Slurring speech and falling over? Not cute. 

Couldn't agree more!  I constantly and jokingly remind FI that he has to be able to consummate the marriage.

grumbledore

SJM7538 said:

grumbledore said:

daveANDkristen said:

grumbledore said:

Fine line for me. Drunk and acting trashy - ew. Drinking and having fun, awesome.

I'm glad someone said this

I was happily buzzed, DH was happily drunk.  He wasn't falling all over himself or anything, but I definitely do wish he hadn't had so much to drink.

Maybe it's just because I'm a drinker and most everyone in our crowd is, but I don't have a problem with a bit of drinking on your wedding day.  You certainly shouldn't get so drunk that you can't remember it though! 

I think this is definitely a consideration.  Pretty much our entire crowd are drinkers (not drunks, but social drinkers) including family - so not only will it be okay to get a little tipsy, it will be expected.

That said, our bartender will have a gentle warning from me to keep an eye on my SO because he can get obnoxious if he overdoes it and that would suck.  But this is very rare so as long as people aren't shoveling drinks down his throat, he'll be fine.

Drinking so much you can't remember would just be depressing.  I can't even imagine.

I have to say that I'm really glad someone said this. My FI rarely over does it but sometimes depending on what he is drinking or if he is with his friends and they are shoveling drinks down his throat he doesn't realize how drunk he actually is. I'll admit this happens to me to from time to time, the drinks just catch up with you at a certain point. Its like you have a good buzz going and then BAM, you're drunk. And when it does happen the night gets fuzzy.

 

There was a thread a while back, I'm talking probably like a year or so, where a bride was trying to prevent her fiance from golfing the morning before the wedding because his family was in town and she was afraid he would get drunk before the ceremony. A lot of people disagreed with her but I agreed with her and said I would probably request that my fiance not golf before the wedding because sometimes when he's with his friends they tend to drink too much. I just thought it was weird that I was in the minority on that. The bolded part just reminded  me of that for some reason.

 

With that said, I plan to limit myself on my wedding day because I would like to remember it and not make an ass of myself.

I don't think it's unreasonable either - I've heard many stories about how my SO's now-BIL was already drunk at his own wedding ceremony because his family was giving him drinks all day before the wedding.

I'll likely have a small glass of wine before the ceremony just because it makes me nervous, but after that I am planning to wait as long as possible before starting any significant drinking.  Hopefully he will think it is wise to do the same.

itzMS

zobird said:

We had a guest (around 30 years old) get drunk enough to think it was okay to stick his hand up his wife's skirt on the dance floor, and she let him, in plain sight of everyone. I really hope they're not in any of our professional photos, because ew.

Might've been me and my DH crashing your wedding, Zo ;-)

DH is notorious for getting handsy. :-D

Jen4948

SunriseAmber said:

I obviously have an unpop opinion. I really don't care if the bride and groom get drunk. If you already had the ceremony, already talked to all your guest and now it's time for dancing and laughing and having a party then why not? I don't drink much and neither does FI so we won't be drunk at our wedding but if someone else does it, who cares? Have fun and let loose!

Ah, I wouldn't want a couple "letting loose" and hitting on me at their wedding.  That's not "fun" or "cute" and it is in fact criminal.

ashleyep

Jen4948 said:

SunriseAmber said:

I obviously have an unpop opinion. I really don't care if the bride and groom get drunk. If you already had the ceremony, already talked to all your guest and now it's time for dancing and laughing and having a party then why not? I don't drink much and neither does FI so we won't be drunk at our wedding but if someone else does it, who cares? Have fun and let loose!

Ah, I wouldn't want a couple "letting loose" and hitting on me at their wedding.  That's not "fun" or "cute" and it is in fact criminal.

Who mentioned hitting on anyone? 

KeptInStitches

Jen, serious question: how on earth is someone hitting on you at a wedding criminal?

harper0813

itzMS said:

zobird said:

We had a guest (around 30 years old) get drunk enough to think it was okay to stick his hand up his wife's skirt on the dance floor, and she let him, in plain sight of everyone. I really hope they're not in any of our professional photos, because ew.

Might've been me and my DH crashing your wedding, Zo ;-)

DH is notorious for getting handsy. :-D

Hahaha! If only!

Jen4948

KeptInStitches said:

Jen, serious question: how on earth is someone hitting on you at a wedding criminal?

If someone gets physical when doing it, it can be assault and battery.

I just find people being trashed obnoxious in general.  At a wedding, even more so.

Maggie0829

Jen4948 said:

KeptInStitches said:

Jen, serious question: how on earth is someone hitting on you at a wedding criminal?

If someone gets physical when doing it, it can be assault and battery.

I just find people being trashed obnoxious in general.  At a wedding, even more so.

But I am going to repeat Ashley's question, who said anything about hitting on anyone?

Jen4948

Maggie0829 said:

Jen4948 said:

KeptInStitches said:

Jen, serious question: how on earth is someone hitting on you at a wedding criminal?

If someone gets physical when doing it, it can be assault and battery.

I just find people being trashed obnoxious in general.  At a wedding, even more so.

But I am going to repeat Ashley's question, who said anything about hitting on anyone?

Nobody, but it's a hazard when people get drunk because drunkenness often causes people to lose their inhibitions that might prevent them from hitting on people when they're sober.  It's just not funny or cute at a wedding-especially when one of the principals is doing it and when someone with a partner, or for that matter anyone who doesn't want to be on the receiving end of it, is the object.

climbingsingle

Huh. 

Maggie0829

Jen4948 said:

Maggie0829 said:

Jen4948 said:

KeptInStitches said:

Jen, serious question: how on earth is someone hitting on you at a wedding criminal?

If someone gets physical when doing it, it can be assault and battery.

I just find people being trashed obnoxious in general.  At a wedding, even more so.

But I am going to repeat Ashley's question, who said anything about hitting on anyone?

Nobody, but it's a hazard when people get drunk because drunkenness often causes people to lose their inhibitions that might prevent them from hitting on people when they're sober.  It's just not funny or cute at a wedding-especially when one of the principals is doing it and when someone with a partner, or for that matter anyone who doesn't want to be on the receiving end of it, is the object.

Getting "hit on" is a hazard whenever you walk out of your house.  Just have a good retort and walk away.  It really isn't as big of a deal as you are making it out to be.  And if someone gets overly hand-friendly then you walk away and directly to a staff member to ask if they could deal with said individual.

Yeah it sucks to get hit on if you don't want to be but shit happens and you deal with it.  I know plenty of people (mainly women) who have been hit on in inappropriate ways by completely sober guys.  So being drunk or not doesn't really matter.

Jen4948

Maggie0829 said:

Jen4948 said:

Maggie0829 said:

Jen4948 said:

KeptInStitches said:

Jen, serious question: how on earth is someone hitting on you at a wedding criminal?

If someone gets physical when doing it, it can be assault and battery.

I just find people being trashed obnoxious in general.  At a wedding, even more so.

But I am going to repeat Ashley's question, who said anything about hitting on anyone?

Nobody, but it's a hazard when people get drunk because drunkenness often causes people to lose their inhibitions that might prevent them from hitting on people when they're sober.  It's just not funny or cute at a wedding-especially when one of the principals is doing it and when someone with a partner, or for that matter anyone who doesn't want to be on the receiving end of it, is the object.

Getting "hit on" is a hazard whenever you walk out of your house.  Just have a good retort and walk away.  It really isn't as big of a deal as you are making it out to be.  And if someone gets overly hand-friendly then you walk away and directly to a staff member to ask if they could deal with said individual.

Yeah it sucks to get hit on if you don't want to be but shit happens and you deal with it.  I know plenty of people (mainly women) who have been hit on in inappropriate ways by completely sober guys.  So being drunk or not doesn't really matter.

Getting drunk is avoidable and unnecessary.