I don't get it...

GoldenPenguin

We haven't had a good controversial thread here for a while, so let's do this. 

- I don't get why there is such a HUGE double standard with rape culture/feminism. People are losing their minds over how "terrible" Blurred Lines is - but why is it okay that Adam Levine sings this in "One More Night":

Try to tell you "no" but my body keeps on telling you "yes."

Try to tell you "stop" but your lipstick got me so out of breath.

I'll be waking up in the morning, probably hating myself.

And I'll be waking up feeling satisfied but guilty as hell.

Because he's a dude? Nope, not buying it. 

- This. Melissa Gorga's new book. Clicky

- I've said this a million times, but I seriously don't get people who don't use their blinkers. You're fucking making a turn in front of me, USE YOUR FUCKING BLINKER. It's not like hitting that little lever is SOOOOO inconvenient. It's RIGHT THERE.

- "Friends" who are only there when it's convenient for them. Don't expect me to put in the effort if you're not going to do the same. 

Okay, you go. 

Blackbird230

I'm going to start with the blinker discussion. COME ON PEOPLE! Grrrr. Or if people use their blinkers correctly and don't just leave them on so when I think you're turning, you don't. Or how about when you're on the highway and you have your blinker on FOREVER to change lanes and people are idiots? #endrant

I've had issues with the friends thing recently. Me inviting my friends out more than they invite me. So annoying.

I think what started the Blurred Lines discussion especially was the video. It definitely played a huge part because people were like OMG this is insane! It got more press that way. People know that our pop/rap music is sexualized and they don't care half the time. Society will still buy the albums and dance to it in clubs.

minskat30

That book, good God, that book.  It makes me want to vomit.  Then again, anything Real Housewife oriented makes me want to vomit.

The over-sexualization of music has always been a little much for me but I think it has been turned up a notch lately.  I actually didn't mind Miley Cyrus' wreckingball song but having seen the video, I'm just disgusted every time I hear it now.

 

Swazzle

@brisox81 - I heard about that book yesterday and I was really disgusted. What's the point of the book supposed to be? It makes me sad and angry when women have no respect for themselves and allow men to treat them like a doormat. 

I also agree about the "friends" part. I'm sick of selfish people who use me to vent about anything and everything but are completely MIA when life gets hard for me and I need a shoulder to lean on. Friendship is a two-way street and some people need to learn that. 

**********

- I don't get why there's such a rush to get to Christmas. I was in Macy's last weekend and they were fully decorated for the holidays. IT IS STILL SEPTEMBER.

- I STILL don't get why everyone hates Anne Hathaway.

- I don't get the point of SnapChat. 

- I don't get when someone who doesn't watch sports tries to talk shit on my team just because they're from a town with a rival team. You're dumb and don't know what you're talking about. Shut the fuck up, please.  

Hummingbird125

UGH, the friend thing: I haven't seen my best friend, N, in months. She only lives about an hour away, and I've been trying to make plans with her forever. I want her and her BF to meet me and my BF in the city, since it's a fair distance from each of us. A few weeks ago I talked to her and asked her to make plans with me, she was busy for the weekend after that but asked if we could do dinner in 2 weeks. She also suggested a Greek restaurant that her and her BF loved that was a lot closer to them than it was to us (I hate Greek food but agreed anyway). The morning of the day we were supposed to go out, she texted me saying she had to house-sit or something and couldn't make it to dinner that night. I haven't heard from her since. I know everyone is busy, but I don't get why she can't meet up with me for ONE freaking night.

/rant over

[Deleted User]

I don't get why my MIL lets her 11 year old son have a cell phone and SnapChat.  I'd be monitoring the heck out of that.  I know what my H has told me about 11-year-old-boy minds, and it ain't pretty.  or rated PG.

[Deleted User]

The blinker thing bothers me too or when someone in front of you rapidly switches lanes and then all of sudden the person in front of them is stopped. That could be my fault but sometimes it helps for the people in front of you to slow down before they switch into the turn lane.

I don't get why people feel that it's ok to flick their cigarette butts out their car window while they're driving...#1 that's littering and I secretly hope a cop sees them and #2 I have an irrational fear that when I drive over it, my car will explode. 

I don't get why people leave their shopping carts in the middle of parking lots b/c "it's not their job to put them back"....#1 it takes up a parking space and #2 it's common courtesy people, walk a few extra steps.

ETA: spelling

phira

This morning, some asshole got annoyed with me for being in the sidewalk because I thought he was going straight, not turning right. PUT YOUR DAMN BLINKER ON.

I didn't know about the Adam Levine song. I can't listen to any shit like that. I actually used to blog something called "When Bad Lyrics Ruin Good Songs" on a feminist blog at college. I think the inaugural post was about Lady Gaga's "Just Dance."

minskat30

@phira - Now "Just Dance" is stuck in my head dammit.

@southernpeach89 - I was just thinking the same thing about cigarette buds but outside of my work.  People go down for smoke breaks and the area is just full of buds.  It is disgusting.

lennonkdc

I'm too sick to get too worked up over stuff today...sorry  

GoldenPenguin

I believe they're "butts." Cigarette butts. Not "buds." 

[Deleted User]

@BriSox81 haha you're right! I always think things are spelled differently than they actually are lol. 

Edit: Spelling and grammar again lol

Swazzle

@brisox81 - Thank you! I was sitting here wondering wtf a cigarette bud was. 

minskat30

@brisox81 - I thought it was "butts" but typing out "People go down for smoke breaks and the area is just full of butts" made me question myself. 

GoldenPenguin

Ooo I have another one (and this isn't aimed at you @southernpeach89, your comment just made me think of it).

I don't get when people bitch about bad spelling and grammar and then use terrible spelling and grammar. If I can't understand what you're saying the first time because of a lack of punctuation and proper grammar, I'm probably not going to care enough to try reading it again. (I probably shouldn't be on the internet.) 

beanbot2002

I'm just really fucking happy right now. I've been super grumpy lately, and thought it was just me. Nope. People are assholes! Whew!

I hate when people litter.

I hate people when people refuse to use blinkers.

I hate when people refuse to put their damn shopping carts back so much, that I will make a point to say, "OH NO! I'LL GET THAT FOR YOU." As I put their cart away.

I hate every quote I read from that book that Bri posted. I couldn't finish the article yesterday. I even tried to make it my poop-time reading, I still couldn't finish it.

I really could go on and on about the shit that I just don't get, or that's pissing me off lately, but I'll stop here.

buddysmom80

Hmmm, here are mine lately:

Blinkers are on your car for a reason, fucking use them!

Also just because you drive a Hummer and I drive a Fit doesn't mean you can ride my ass like a horse jockey during the Kentucky Derby.

The friend thing I totally get. I was at my friend's house helping her with favors this week and told her about BF having the diamond and she just kind of blew me off. Um, we've been friends for almost 10 years and that's the reaction I get? Well then, fuck you and oh your favors are tacky.

If your H is unemployed and is spending his days doing nothing but watching internet porn or going fishing and your looking for jobs for him, you have some major fucking issues.

Also, don't look down at me because I don't go to church every Sunday.

I also can't stand when people who don't have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of think they're better than some people (me) because they have a bigger house.

I'm sure I'll add to this.

cu97tiger

I only have two minutes, so I'm only going to respond to the Blurred Lines one.

To me, Adam Levine is talking to himself. He's like 'dammit, I want to say no, but I freaking want her so bad that I'm saying yes.' In Blurred Lines, I can definitely see how someone could hear it as saying 'her grinding up on me means she wants it' when her grinding up on him just means she wants to grind up on him. 

The first few times I heard the song, I took 'blurred lines' as a blurred line for HER since she is in a relationship but also wants this other guy. The more I hear it, the more I think it's the guy saying 'that there is a blurred line of whether she's saying yes or no.'

bethsmiles

Why the fuck would anyone advocate martial rape?! That's absolutely disgusting.

I haven't heard Blurred Lines or that Adam Levine song but I think just in general there are a lot of problems with the way our society views/talks about rape.

To add a new one of my own - I don't get my students. They think everything should be handed to them and I should constantly bend over backwards for them while they put in minimal effort. Last semester I loved my students this semester there are more than a few I want to slap in the face.

phira

@bethsmiles Last year, I didn't have any students at my office hours till halfway through the semester. This year, same course, I had students emailing me left and right after the first class, and I've had students at almost every office hour. I have no idea what's up with this class versus last year's class!

Hummingbird125

I don't get why, when I'm getting frustrated over my inability to create labels with images on them, BF says to me "Oh, just Google it!" or "There should be a template for that on MS Word." DO YOU THINK I HAVEN'T TRIED THOSE OBVIOUS SOLUTIONS YET? Really?

Finally, I handed over the computer and less than two minutes go by before he concedes "Oh, this might be a little tricky." No sh!t. Hence my frustration. 

CASK85

@swazzle - I totally agree with you about non-sports fans suddenly trash talking me/my teams when they happen to play their "hometown" team. True story: when the Blackhawks won the cup in 2010 against the Flyers my friend (female who has zero interest in sports) from Philly came to watch a game (game 4 I think) with us at a bar (all the while asking such things as "what is icing?" and "why did they blow the whistle that time?"). She was talking so much trash that I told her to leave. Yelled at her to leave the bar because no one wanted her there anyway. She left. . . luckily we're still friends. lol But seriously, wtf is these people's problem?

I don't get:

Hating on hashtags. They serve a purpose. On the other hand, over-tagging something to the point of incomprehension annoys the crap out of me. 

Not sending thank you cards. It has been two months since my friend's wedding. That I was in. That I gave a gift to (and a shower gift, also no card). That I helped set up AND tear down for. That my HUSBAND helped tear down for. That I missed my mom's birthday for. That I flew across the country for. That I planned a bachelorette party for. WTF? Is it so hard to send a card to say thanks?

Grad school. 

Babymoons. 

Swazzle

@cschiano - Good for you! I had the same issue when the Devils played the Kings in the Stanley Cup finals. Suddenly, EVERYONE was a Kings fan. 

I also agree with you on the hashtags. And thank you cards. My friend (who chose not to open her gifts at her shower, but that's another story) never sent out thank you cards for her shower or her wedding. So rude. 

KateJ16

Ooo I want to join in the grumpiness!

I have a love/hate relationship with my work location.  On the plus side, it's on Michigan Avenue, near good stores and good food, and it's a 15 minute bus ride.  On the down side, it's on Michigan Avenue.  It is so g-d annoying that I get asked nearly EVERY day to sign some stupid petition, and that I have to constantly weave in and out of tourists who either aren't paying attention, or are trying to walk and look up at the buildings and take photos at the same time.

I also hate when people walk on the wrong side of the sidewalk - and then won't move out of your way (even though you and everyone else is going in the same direction). 

I think in general people that don't do what I do are just annoying

phira

I don't get why people think that they need to play music SO LOUD on their headphones/earbuds on public transit. I don't want to hear your STUPID FUCKING MUSIC.

KateJ16

@phira that drives me nuts too - I just go by the assumption that it must be so loud because they have caused themselves to go deaf.

cu97tiger

I'm with you @cschiano. I love a well-placed hashtag. You know, one that serves its original purpose, to be able to search that term and find other tweets/posts with the same theme. Not one that lets you write a sentence without any periods... #youknowwhatImean

ETA: an actual hashtag... #hashtagfail

suzie211

@cu97tiger  I interpreted Adam Levine's song the same way you did.  I don't get a rape vibe out of it.   I also had similar thoughts to "Blurred Lines".  Robin Thicke actually explained it how I had been interpreting it.  His intended the song to be about the blurred lines between being a bad girl or a good girl.  Essentially the girl wants to hook up, but she's with someone else and that makes her a bad girl causing blurred lines.

@minskat30 I also really liked Miley's Wrecking Ball.  Supposedly its about her torrent relationship with her ex-FI, but clearly the video was done for shock value and not to necessarily represent the words.   I think Robin Thicke's video had the same intention.  Clearly they both worked because people are talking about them and watching it.

@kateJ16 H works on Michigan Ave, too.  I hate going to visit him for the same reason's you mentioned.  I lived off Michigan in River North for 3 years and the tourists and petition signers were a huge reason I left.

Melissa Gorga makes me want to vomit. 

I hate suburbanites that claim to be from Chicago.  No.  Just because you live within an hour radius of the city does not make you a resident.  Schaumburg =/= Chicago.  Coming into the city twice a year, playing tourist on Michigan Ave, and eating Gino's East does not magically give you residence here.  

Why is everyone so up in arms and crying "rape" over Blurred Lines, when I don't remember anyone being upset when Rhianna and Eminem glorified physical abuse in "Love the Way You Lie"?     Apparently tying a person to a bed and lighting them on fire is less offensive.

CASK85

@Suzie211 - that Rihanna song really bugs me, actually

Also, I work right off Michigan Ave too. My bus home picks up right in front of the Water Tower Mall. I hate coming to the lab on weekends. Fucking tourists. 

minskat30

@suzie211 - Ugh, I HATE that about suburbanities too. 

@suzie211, @cschiano and @KateJ16 - The tourists drive me batty too as does loud music on the El (at 7 am, playing rap or some shit I really don't want to hear when I'm barely awake).  Thankfully, my office is right by the river on Wacker so no Michigan Ave traffic for me (though my food options here are not as great as they should be). 

 

KateJ16

@suzie211 - don't you just love it when those people are from Indiana??? Indiana =/= Chicago.  No way, no how - Not even the same state.

@minskat30 - funny, you probably work right near me!  I'm right off Michigan and the river