I wasn't sure where to post this, so I am hoping here is ok.
As some of you already know, I am getting married May 29th. My Fi and I originally asked my Grandparents (who had been married 60 years) to be our honorary/host couple last year after we first got engaged. A few months after, my Grandmother fell and broke her hip and her health declined (she also had been diagnosed with lung cancer a year prior). She passed away last December. She was the only Grandma I ever knew, and I was extremely close to her. My Fi and I live two blocks from my Grandparents. Once we knew the reality of my Grandparents not playing that role in our wedding, we asked my Aunt and Uncle (who is also my godfather), who have been huge role models in our lives and who we love respect very much. They graciously accepted. They live on the West Coast and we live in the Midwest. About a month ago, my Uncle's health has deteriorated. He too, was diagnosed with lung cancer a little over a year ago. His prognosis seemed to be a lot better than my Grandmother's was. Well, that's not the case. I recently was told that he nor my Aunt will be able to make it to the wedding. I understand 100% and don't want my Uncle to travel or do anything that will jeopardize his health. I have listed all of our wedding party information on our knot website, and this includes our honorary couple/host couple. We have asked some good friends of ours to do this, if my Aunt and Uncle weren't able to, and they said they'd be happy to. They actually said they would be on stand-by, as they don't want to step on anyone's toes. How do I handle this? I want to keep my Aunt and Uncle in the front seat, as they are very special to us, yet I also want to acknowledge our good friends. We are also in a situation where we asked two of my cousin's to be ushers (both son's of above mentioned Aunt and Uncle), and they aren't able to now because of prior commitments. One plays baseball on a scholarship at Berkeley, so missing a game isn't even an option.
I have a feeling we are going need more than the two ushers we currently have. Once again, do I completely ignore the fact that my cousins were going to do this, and honor the back up ushers? How do we approach the back up ushers without making them feel like they were second choice, which they basically were.
I am sorry for the long post. I am just so saddened and overwhelmed by all that's been going on in my life for the past 4-5 months. I know this is life, and things like this happen. I wanted my Grandma to be able to be at my wedding more than anything and it hurts so much to know she won't be, physically, anyway. I know she will be there in spirit. I am still grieving the loss of my Grandma, and now am trying to prepare myself as much as I can for the passing of another very close family member. It's so hard to stay focused and happy right now, when my life is consumed with sadness and sickness. I am an extremely emotional person anyway, and always joked about what a mess I would be on my wedding day. Well, now I am really concerned. To be honest, If we could re-schedule everything, we would. Don't get me wrong, I love my Fi with all my heart and am very excited to share the rest of my life with him, I just don't know that I am going to be able to hold myself together on our big day. It's really bothering me.