My FI has 2 children (5 & 9) and I want to include them in the ceremony but I am not sure how. I have read over and over that they need to be included. Most say to inlcude the 5 yr old as a ring bearer, but we weren't planning on a flower girl or ring bearer. The oldest child can be very shy and I'm not sure he would feel comfortable being an usher. I'm thinking that they could just walk with their dad down the aisle and stand beside them during the ceremony.
The other thing I want to do is to have vows from me to the children and present them with a gift. I have seen the family medalions and also seen rings to give children but it just seems so "girly" for lack of better wording. They are boys (rough and tough as my FI would say) and I'm not sure what to give them.
We are having an outside ceremony and hadn't planning on doing a unity candle. I know that I am making this difficult, but are there other ways to let them know that they too are important.