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40-Plus Brides
I kinda feel bad for the youngstahs....
Something that's been bugging me about the myriad issues here is how much peer pressure and/or societal pressure that now seems to be on these young brides. Some of it is the marital-industrial complex, I know. But still--some is self-induced.
Now, I've been going to weddings for decades. When I started there were little tulle-wrapped candy-shell nuts. There were plain old cardboard numbers on a stick for the table. Heh--I remember matchbooks as table indicators. Somebody had an old basket for the cards.
But the stuff that's been layered on since--programs? Card boxes for $60? Frames for table numbers? Bubbles? Cameras?
Yeah, I know...old lady yelling at clouds. But it just seems so trivial to me, and causing headaches for them. I kinda feel bad for the pressure they are under to conform.
Now, I've been going to weddings for decades. When I started there were little tulle-wrapped candy-shell nuts. There were plain old cardboard numbers on a stick for the table. Heh--I remember matchbooks as table indicators. Somebody had an old basket for the cards.
But the stuff that's been layered on since--programs? Card boxes for $60? Frames for table numbers? Bubbles? Cameras?
Yeah, I know...old lady yelling at clouds. But it just seems so trivial to me, and causing headaches for them. I kinda feel bad for the pressure they are under to conform.
Retro/Vintage Inspirations
This discussion has been closed.
Re: I kinda feel bad for the youngstahs....
@Lucy: OMG, you have the list down! And that is the thing--it's not just bubbles, or wands, it's the kaboodle.
I think our tastes and priorities are just different than the younger brides.
I think they try to out do each other. Not necessarily on the boards, but with their friends. The wedding planning business is making millions off them! And us to! LOL!
And I can't help but drool and get a little wistful when I look at really nice pictures of other people's weddings where they do some of the fun or theme-y stuff that I know I don't need but yet kinda want...
but alas I remind myself that it is "just one day" and therefore I won't be spending my 401k!
I guess I wish the younger brides would be able to realize that it's not all needed. I think they are being pressured into some of it.
On fun and themey--check out these "extreme" weddings I found the other day: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-13115485 I would never want giraffes--but I am glad for that couple it's what they wanted....
Fortunately, for my second wedding, my bride and I were sensible. We worked on having what we wanted--to the extent within our budget--and ignoring everything else. The result was that over a year after our wedding, people are still commenting on how much fun it was.
Our wedding bio page (including vendor reviews) and items for sale
we have several friends/relatives who have gone into debt for their weddings. sure, they were nice, but not worth paying for years to come.
OMG...everyone here has said what I have been thinking for years...why all the money for the hoopla? Married is married. The wedding industry and the cost is ridiculous.
Now, I'm seriously thinking of cutting back on my 100 people, making it more like 50.
Elegant and classy, but inexpensive.
S and CJ
[QUOTE]My H and I paid for our own wedding and HM. My parents ended up hosting a rehearsal dinner at the last minute b/c H's family is OOT (though we didn't actually have a rehearsal). TBH, we spent way too much money on the damned thing but it was exactly the kind of wedding we wanted. <font color="#0000ff"><strong>45 guests, unlimited bar, done at 11. It was awesome. No receiving line, bouquet toss, garter toss, and the only 'formal' dance was our first dance.</strong></font> We actually received thank you notes from a few of our guests to thank us for inviting them to the wedding. I 've never even thought about sending a thank you note for being able to attend a wedding!
Posted by jcbsjr[/QUOTE]
This is, more or less, the approach we're taking. Our guest count will (likely) be around 50 - 55. Open bar ends @ 10 and we'll depart shortly thereafter. We're turning the receiving line concept on its head -- greeting each of our guests together, once they've been seated, as the kick-off to the ceremony.
[QUOTE]so i stumbled across this thread bc i noticed this was a new board...im not trying to cause drama but thought this was funny and posted it in the chit chat and <strong>they bitched at me</strong> and said i should post my opinion here. its not ridiculous what brides these days choose to have...a lot of the things u mentioned that were ridiculous r DIY projects and save a lot of money. little details make weddings more special, they make them stand out. so u can save ur pity bc <strong>we </strong>dont want it. <strong>we</strong> do want the little details and fun projects. thanks
Posted by katelyn26[/QUOTE]
Cause that's totally what everyone was doing.
And speak for yourself, Captain Save a Newb.
Hawaii with my best friend
Come and talk to us in 10 years. Or better still in 25 when you daughter claims to need $250 for a card box.
I was impressed by the responses in the Chat thread. They have your number.
Our wedding date is November 12, 2011
RSVP Date October 12th, 2011
[QUOTE]@ katelyn26 : yes, dear, I'm sure you need to convince yourself of that. You are incredibly hip and deep with your nearly-legible text-speak too. We bow to your superior understanding and mastery of wedding needs. Come and talk to us in 10 years. Or better still in 25 when you daughter claims to need $250 for a card box. I was impressed by the responses in the Chat thread. They have your number.
Posted by memSomerville[/QUOTE]
using text talk is faster...ik when to use it and when not to. i scored very high on my act and im my major is in the school of journalism at my college. and if all u old brides are gonna do is bitch about what young brides do for diy projects and whatnot then why did u even need ur own special board or the knot at all?<div>
</div><div>ps i cant wait to spoil my daughter and give her everything for her wedding</div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I kinda feel bad for the youngstahs.... : using text talk is faster..<strong>.ik when to use it and when not to.</strong> i scored very high on my act and im my major is in the school of journalism at my college. and if all u old brides are gonna do is bitch about what young brides do for diy projects and whatnot then why did u even need ur own special board or the knot at all? ps i cant wait to spoil my daughter and give her everything for her wedding
Posted by katelyn26[/QUOTE]
No, I really don't think you do.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I kinda feel bad for the youngstahs.... : No, I really don't think you do.
Posted by RamonaFlowers[/QUOTE]
um ok except i do but it doesnt really matter how ppl talk on the message boards
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I kinda feel bad for the youngstahs.... : um ok except i do but it doesnt really matter how ppl talk on the message boards
Posted by katelyn26[/QUOTE]
But it does. If it really wasn't a big deal, people wouldn't be correcting you and saying you shouldn't do it. When on a forum like this, it's just good netiquette to use proper spelling and grammar and would only take a few extras seconds than your "txt speak".
The only thing we have to communicate with you is your written words, and frankly, forcing people to try and puzzle out your "txt speak" when you've already been told by multiple people that you shouldn't is just rude.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I kinda feel bad for the youngstahs.... : But it does. If it really wasn't a big deal, people wouldn't be correcting you and saying you shouldn't do it. When on a forum like this, it's just good netiquette to use proper spelling and grammar and would only take a few extras seconds than your "txt speak". The only thing we have to communicate with you is your written words, and frankly, forcing people to try and puzzle out your "txt speak" when you've already been told by multiple people that you shouldn't is just rude.
Posted by RamonaFlowers[/QUOTE]
whatever ur not gonna change how i speak
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: I kinda feel bad for the youngstahs.... : whatever ur not gonna change how i speak
Posted by katelyn26[/QUOTE]
Okay, troll, I really don't have time to play with somebody that only got out of diapers within the last week. Shame on your mommy for letting her toddler playing on the internet. She should be taking you to the playground and all that other important developmental crap that parents need to do with their kids so they don't grow up to be maladjusted brats with no concept of basic social skills.
Katelyn, you really do seem incredibly immature. Incredibly. And a lot of that has to do with your text speaking.
Lots of good luck to you.
Hawaii with my best friend
[QUOTE]Whatever, Manwa! You're probably just married to a Marine! Everybody knows that women married to Marines are total bitches
Posted by RamonaFlowers[/QUOTE]
Yup. Everyone. Just like everyone who types in text speak is extremely immature.
Katelyn, before you fly off the handle on that one, notice the difference. We're saying you "sound" or "come across" as immature because of the way you choose to "speak" to us. We have no idea how mature you really are (though I'm not sure what to think honestly). But that is how you're coming across. And Ramona tried to help you by explaining that and you just decided to do the teenage thing of "Whatever, I do what I want!".
Just so you know how you're looking to us.
Hawaii with my best friend
Except wait, no it's not because I was taught to type on a real keyboard and not my phone. Even trying to type in text speak is like extra work for me.
Katelyn do you take anyone's advice when given to you? Ever?
[QUOTE]you ladies are f*cking ridiculous...im done talking to you because its a waste of my time and ik how mature and intelligent I am and how dare you insult my parents and how they parented me. <strong>newsflash im 18</strong>! and getting married just like you! Im an adult so quit being such a f*cking c*nt
Posted by katelyn26[/QUOTE]
This is not surprising in the least.
Oh and beeteedubs, reported.
[QUOTE]you ladies are f*cking ridiculous...im done talking to you because its a waste of my time and ik how mature and intelligent I am and how dare you insult my parents and how they parented me. newsflash<strong>im 18! and getting married just like you!</strong>Im an adult so quit being such a f*cking c*nt
Posted by katelyn26[/QUOTE]
What a shock!!! I'll bet though that you'll be divorced within ten years while everyone lese here will still be married. See, you can be 18 to get married without your parents' permission but you have to be an adult to make a marriage work.
ETA - I guess it was just that one post that got removed