Bachelor Party....Rules?

526SadieSadie · May 2010

I got into a discussion with a friend over the weekend and I was wondering what the general concensus was...

For the record, the night of our parties, we're going to be checking in with each other, but that's just what we do when we got out separately, it's not a rule or anything

betrothed123 · May 2010

I don't like any of your answers so I didn't vote. I don't think "anything short of cheating" is okay, but I do (and did at the time of his b-party) trust my H to respect me, and no cross any of the lines that are always in place in our relationship. There's no need for me to check up on him because he's a big boy who can check up on himself and keep himself in line.

laurenclaire1386 · May 2010

If you don't trust your fiance enough to go out without you for one night and maybe he might even see (not touch, see) some nekkid chicks that aren't you, you don't need to be getting married. Really, it's just not that big a deal. I don't know if any of FI's GMs will throw him a bach party, but if they do, I trust FI completely. Period.

526SadieSadie · May 2010

I agree Lauren, that was my opinion when I was talking to my friend. If there's no trust, there shouldn't be a marriage. She was saying the opposite, but then again, she's been married twice.
We just check in with each other when we're not together, it's not an insecurity thing, it's a "miss you and I hope you're having fun" thing

kd.joseph · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bachelor-partyrules?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6d418df9-4755-45be-b267-a7d1f1c87954Post:d467813b-bcf6-4e1c-86f9-49112d8adecd">Re: Bachelor Party....Rules?</a>:
[QUOTE]If you don't trust your fiance enough to go out without you for one night and maybe he might even see (not touch, see) some nekkid chicks that aren't you, you don't need to be getting married. Really, it's just not that big a deal. I don't know if any of FI's GMs will throw him a bach party, but if they do, I trust FI completely. Period.
Posted by laurenclaire1386[/QUOTE]

You must be in my head LC. My FI was actually in another state camping at Talladaga with his buddies who drove him to a strip club. We joked later that he would come home with glitter on him. I have no problems with it. I trust him.

salt78 · May 2010

I feel like checking in to be all "I miss you" kind of defeats the purpose of the bachelor party.

526SadieSadie · May 2010

I can see your point Salt, but it's just a habit at this point

Celles · May 2010

Knowing my FI, he'll have a LAN party or something equally geeky. If his friends actually succeed in getting him to a club, then I'll be surprised, but I'll trust him. No rules. No checking in.

salt78 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bachelor-partyrules?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6d418df9-4755-45be-b267-a7d1f1c87954Post:03af42bc-fb26-46e7-b513-1bb3f1a1b483">Re: Bachelor Party....Rules?</a>:
[QUOTE]I can see your point Salt, but it's just a habit at this point
Posted by 526SadieSadie[/QUOTE]

<div>Fair enough. A lot of times it's that way for DH and I too, but we decided we weren't going to call during our b-parties. </div><div>
</div><div>As it turned out, I couldn't have called him if I wanted to because his friends took away his wallet and phone. hahah</div>

betrothed123 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bachelor-partyrules?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6d418df9-4755-45be-b267-a7d1f1c87954Post:f494c720-4232-4915-9613-5d274e960b7f">Re: Bachelor Party....Rules?</a>:
[QUOTE]I feel like checking in to be all "I miss you" kind of defeats the purpose of the bachelor party.
Posted by salt78[/QUOTE]

Agreed. Besides, my H would have been ragged on so hard by his friends if I had nagged him during his B-party.

californiadreamin07 · May 2010

My FI very specifically said he didn't want one, but his BM is going to take him to play pool with some friends. Honestly, I wasn't all that worried either way, and when he said he didn't want one, I told him that it wouldn't hurt my feelings if he did. That being said, our relationship has been long distance, so there has to be a lot of trust.

jennylove810 · May 2010

Ditto the other ladies. I want my FI to have the time of his life, go crazy, check out nekkid chicks and drink his face off. Well not really but you know what I mean. It's his bachelor party - I don't want him texting me or calling me throughout the night, I want him to go out and have one hell of a good time.

RandiLakin · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bachelor-partyrules?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6d418df9-4755-45be-b267-a7d1f1c87954Post:02527392-7b7a-4328-904f-cf13a926f3f5">Re: Bachelor Party....Rules?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Bachelor Party....Rules? : You must be in my head LC. My FI was actually in another state camping at Talladaga with his buddies who drove him to a strip club. We joked later that he would come home with glitter on him. I have no problems with it. I trust him.
Posted by kd.joseph[/QUOTE]

This is probably going to be my FI's bach party too! Him and BM love to fish and camp! I wouldnt be suprised if they went to a strip club, i trust that he would never hurt me or cheat onme. He feels the same about me. haha, Actually whenever i go out with my friends i usually flirt with the men at the bar so i get a free drink. FI knows and thinks its funny! I rarely spend my own money on drinks!! I hardly ever go out though.

Tinkx123x · May 2010

No checking in with either of us. I think he'll probably call at the end of the night on his own and let me know hes still alive.

526SadieSadie · May 2010

Glad to see I'm in touch with reality. My friend (who, granted, has some trust issues) said that if she "let" her boyfriend (they aren't engaged, we were speaking hypothetically) have a bach party, he'd have to call her every hour on the hour and all of these other things that he "had" to do or she'd break up with him and cancel the whole wedding right away. I knew she was a really extreme case, but it got me wondering about the issues women stereotypically are said to have about their fiance's stag night.

jajph1974 · May 2010

I got a drunken call from Tim around 1:00 AM. He wanted to say goodnight and let me know he was still alive.

I heard his best friend in the backround talking to his wife too. I was amused.

laurenclaire1386 · May 2010

Your friend sounds like a big ole bag of crazy.

526SadieSadie · May 2010

Lauren, you have no idea how bat shite she can be. LoL If I were a guy, I wouldn't go near her with a ten foot pole knowing her need to control stuff and her lack of trust issues but she's a great girlfriend and we have a lot of fun together

kd.joseph · May 2010

Well this explains 2 marriages already.

Just an FYI, this is my third marriage. Both my first and second husbands screwed around on me. But, I dont take it out on the man who didn't. I fixed myself, and I fixed my picker.
Your girlfriend needs a reality check, or she'll be alone again.

526SadieSadie · May 2010

I agree KD. She's the type (and this is all stuff that I've said to her face, so I'm not being catty) to pick up a guy in a bar and two days later tell him she's pregnant. She's done it twice that I can think of. She's got abandonment issues, big time and I feel bad for her. Her dad left when she was six or seven and her mom dumped her on her grandmother's doorstep a year later, then grandma died a couple years later and she got bounced around relatives homes until she was 18. I love her and given the circumstances, I cut her a lot of slack.

kd.joseph · May 2010

She needs more help then you can give her it seems. Just let what she says go in one ear and out the other. And dont let her get in your relationship.

She sounds like she's already trying to start crap.

Night_Sprite · May 2010

For H's bachelor party, he went out with friends doing who knows what. I got a text about 1:00 am that said, "I am very drunk and sleepy. I love you" but spelled badly. I had no need to be involved in his playdate with his friends.

allisong23 · May 2010

I told fi no hookers, but everything else was fine. He doesn't have much interest in strip clubs, so they might not even do that. They will probably sit around and drink in a dive bar all day and night. I wish I could join them, not to check up on them, but because it sounds fun!

526SadieSadie · May 2010

Nah, she's not trying to start anything, I would have nipped that one in the bud. She asked me if I was "letting" Dan have a party and I told her he wanted to have one, so he's having one and it's not a matter of me letting him. That's when she started telling me her long list of rules. The guy she's seeing now is really a saint, he puts up with a lot but I don't know how long he'd stick around if he knew her as well as I do!

[Deleted User] · May 2010

The only 'rule' I made for DH's party was no strippers. Not because I don't trust him, but because strippers disgust me and the thought of him looking at one and getting excited in the least grosses me out. Yes, I am a prude and can admit it. But I certainly didn't make him check in. He told me where he was going and called on his own to say they were going out to a bar down the street, which I appreciated because I do worry about his safety (something my mom ingrained in my head, always worrying about people when they are out late at night).

But to make him check in every 15 minutes? Christ, what's the point of even having a bachelor party?

salt78 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bachelor-partyrules?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6d418df9-4755-45be-b267-a7d1f1c87954Post:87b482ac-3444-41fb-bbe1-93c465a07b6e">Re: Bachelor Party....Rules?</a>:
[QUOTE]Not because I don't trust him, but because strippers disgust me and the thought of him looking at one and getting excited in the least grosses me out.
Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]

<div>You don't "let" him have porn in the house either, do you?</div>

loop0406 · May 2010

I don't see anything wrong with strippers, drinking, clubs at bachelor parties, I'm heading to Vegas for my bachelorette and we're already researching strip clubs....I think checking in is kinda childish, a person can't enjoy their last night of 'freedom' thinking they have to check their phone or texts every hour or whatever. As long as there is no cheating (as in sleeping with someone else) then everything should be okay !

SarahPLiz · May 2010

If I had any doubts about him acting appropriately, I wouldn't be marrying him. He's an adult and I trust him to act accordingly. If he wants to go look at naked girls, I don't care. that's what guys like to do.

526SadieSadie · May 2010

Loop, have an awesome time in Vegas!!! Have a drink in the lounge at the Peppermill for me!! I swear Las Vegas is the only place in the world where I can drink alcohol at 10 in the morning and not feel like a scumbag, and Peppermill has AWESOME breakfasts LoL

betrothed123 · May 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_bachelor-partyrules?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:6d418df9-4755-45be-b267-a7d1f1c87954Post:87b482ac-3444-41fb-bbe1-93c465a07b6e">Re: Bachelor Party....Rules?</a>:
[QUOTE]The only 'rule' I made for DH's party was no strippers. Not because I don't trust him, but because strippers disgust me and the thought of him looking at one and getting excited in the least grosses me out. Yes, I am a prude and can admit it. But I certainly didn't make him check in. He told me where he was going and called on his own to say they were going out to a bar down the street, which I appreciated because I do worry about his safety (something my mom ingrained in my head, always worrying about people when they are out late at night). But to make him check in every 15 minutes? Christ, what's the point of even having a bachelor party?
Posted by Seshat411[/QUOTE]
You make rules or a child, not your FI/H.

maratea · May 2010

H went to a strip club for his bachelor party and a stripper put her boobs in his face. H told me about, do I care? No. In fact, I'm slighly miffed I didn't get boobs in my face.

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