Really?? Re: Gifts

tenofcups4me · August 2009

Tenof--Dude if my friends did it your way, I'd be broke before the shower!! That is insane!:-) On the flip side, you wouldn't need to spend any money to set up your household and you'd have lots of cash in the bank after the wedding so you could afford to pay it forward... I should add that there's only a handful of friends who I would give gifts like that to (and ALL my cousins). I don't expect to be invited to an engagement party for a casual acquaintance (it's happened but not so often). The parties are typically family and close friends. And, as I said, those are people who I'm giving a gift to, whether they have a party or not.

AlexiaANDRobert · August 2009

Classier? What's classier than beer pong? Hahaha. That's the only time we clear the table - at BBQs. My siblings and I have tournaments. NOT for engagement parties or weddings... Anyway, as far as gift giving is concerned, I don't think anyone has enough money to contribute 5 gifts to a couple for all the wedding events that are "gift giving" occasions. I think it depends on each person, their circle of friends and how things are handled. People have A LOT more expenses now than they used to. I can't afford to buy my friends 5 nice gifts. I have no problem with getting them cards, but I usually only buy a shower gift and a weddung gift. I think it's up to the individual person but a card is always appropriate.

Liz4444 · August 2009

an engagement party is definitely a gift giving event, but with my parents friends, an engagement in general is a gift giving event. the first thing people ask my parents when they hear we are engaged is "where are they registered?" we did not have a party, but have received numerous gifts, mainly decorative crystal bowls and vases. then for the shower they will give the china, silver, stemware and kitchen stuff. and usually a check at the wedding. and i was taught that you always bring some form of gift no matter what the party is for, even if it's an informal dinner party or bbq at someones house.

aMrsin09 · August 2009

TLV I was always taught that the hostess gift of wine should NOT be consumed at the party becasue the hostess will have already provided everything for her guests. The wine is for her to enjoy later.

tlv204 · August 2009

Amrs--Yeah I didn't think about it that way, but I also think my friends and family are alcoholics. They'd see the wine and open it before I got all the way through the door. I still don't consider this a gift though. Never going to a party "empty handed" does not mean you have to buy china for every party you go to. There's a big difference.

angiebear11 · August 2009

This is what I don't understand, if most people feel that E-Parties aren't gift-giving events, just another party, then why do so many of you feel that a couple shouldn't host their own. People host their own parties all the time. And no, FI and I didn't host our own.And another thing, I would never get an invite to an E-Party/shower/etc. and think Oh great another gift I have to get. I would get the couple a gift because I want to not because I feel obligated.

Lyss5782 · August 2009

FWIW, Im not defending e-parties...just saying I would bring a gift if invited (I told my mom to please not throw one for us).I would say for the LI weddings I've gone to, its just one wedding gift, 2 if Im close enough to be invited to the shower...3 if Im close enough to be invited to the shower AND the person throws an engagement party (which, as Ive said, seems gift-grabby to me). I wouldnt spend as much on the parties as I would on the wedding.(And Ang, Im from Baldwin--Nassau)

angiebear11 · August 2009

Not too far from me, I live in New Hyde Park.

Lyss5782 · August 2009

and I agree with aMrs...to me, there is a difference between bringing the host a bottle of wine and bringing a paper plate of brownies. EVEN if its consumed, it is more of a "gift"...especially if you put it in a wine gift bag (but now we're just talking semantics!)

Soon-to-be Mrs. Vogt · August 2009

Angie - you should never throw a party in your own honor, regardless of whether or not gifts are given.It's tacky, and AWish. That's why we say you shouldn't host your own. I think receptions are the one rule, and even then, most people aren't technically the hosts...it's the couples parents, or honorary couples, that sort of thing.

angiebear11 · August 2009

Vogt, I'm not saying I disagree. It just seems odd to me that the same people that think E-Parties aren't gift-giving events are the same people that think you should host your own. I'm I agree that you should host your own, but that's mostly because I fell its a gift giving event and it would look gift-grabby.

angiebear11 · August 2009

Souldn't host your own*

tlv204 · August 2009

Receptions aren't technically in your honor either. They're a thank you to guests.

mandysmear · August 2009

I hate to reference sex and the city. But, what about people who choose NOT to get married, or just do not get married not by their choice. WTF do they get?

Lyss5782 · August 2009

I agree with Ang (and not just because us Lawn Guiland girls should stick together). If you do NOT believe that its a gift-giving event then I have no problem with people throwing their own engagement party...its just a happy occassion, "hey were engaged come drink and celebrate with us."

Lyss5782 · August 2009

lol mandy, they can throw a house-warming party??? id bring a gift to that too!

angiebear11 · August 2009

Many I'll throw them a "I'm glad you didn't marry the wrong man" Party!

angiebear11 · August 2009

Mandy*

AlexiaANDRobert · August 2009

I agree with Ang (and not just because us Lawn Guiland girls should stick together). If you do NOT believe that its a gift-giving event then I have no problem with people throwing their own engagement party...its just a happy occassion, "hey were engaged come drink and celebrate with us." We did this. "Hey! We're engaged. Come have a drink with us at XYZ bar!"

Lyss5782 · August 2009

Alexia, had you invited me, I would have brought you monogrammed beer pong balls.

tlv204 · August 2009

omg I want monogrammed beer pong balls.

AlexiaANDRobert · August 2009

Lyss - I'll have another one. I'll do it. Don't tempt me. Funny enough, I was just talking about how monogram obsessed I am! I haven't bought anything yet, but I want to!

Really?? Re: Gifts

Re: Really?? Re: Gifts

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