FML

kaitlyn142 · November 2010

My FI is agnostic. I'm atheist or agnostic, depending on my mood., but raised Catholic. We are having a Catholic wedding, as I consider myself culturally Catholic and the tradition of a church wedding is important to me.

My FMIL is born-again Christian. She HATES that we are having a Catholic wedding, to the extent that she tried to forbid it. She also doesn't like me, but whatever.

FMIL says that she will drop the fight against a Catholic wedding as long as FI and I go talk to her priest. I assume he's going to do his best to get us to accept Jesus Christ as our lord and savior. Not gonna happen.

In order to make FMIL happy, I have to play nice and pretend like I don't think that believing the dinosaurs were on Noah's ark is absolutely psychotic.

Did I mention that we are spending the whole Thanksgiving holiday with them? Oh, and she wants us to surprise her side of the family with the announcement. They all think I'm a terrible person.

Kill me. Please.

anna.oskar · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:853cc320-2472-4e91-ad73-ecb22ac84941">FML</a>:
[QUOTE]My FI is agnostic. I'm atheist or agnostic, depending on my mood., but raised Catholic. We are having a Catholic wedding, as I consider myself culturally Catholic and the tradition of a church wedding is important to me. My FMIL is born-again Christian. She HATES that we are having a Catholic wedding, to the extent that she tried to forbid it. She also doesn't like me, but whatever. FMIL says that she will drop the fight against a Catholic wedding as long as FI and I go talk to her priest. I assume he's going to do his best to get us to accept Jesus Christ as our lord and savior. Not gonna happen. :p In order to make FMIL happy, I have to play nice and pretend like I don't think that believing the dinosaurs were on Noah's ark is absolutely psychotic. Did I mention that we are spending the whole Thanksgiving holiday with them? Oh, and she wants us to surprise her side of the family with the announcement. They all think I'm a terrible person. Kill me. Please.
Posted by kaitlyn142[/QUOTE]

i'm pretty sure that you're going to have to talk to a priest (and more) in order to get married in the catholic church.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't their mandatory classes that have to be taken?

I think it's really crappy to "pretend" you are of a belief just so you can have the backdrop you want for your wedding.

<a href="http://community.theknot.com/cs/ks/user/default.aspx?membershipid=6525218244478716&plckUserId=6525218244478716" target="_blank" class="username_knot">kaitlyn142</a>: do you prefer to go by Kaitlyn? or Kat?

Nebb · November 2010

While Im sure thats frustrating, I dont think its really a FML worthy situation. Sometimes you gotta do things you know will suck for the sake of playing nice with the inlaws.

staceytaylor0704 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:853cc320-2472-4e91-ad73-ecb22ac84941">FML</a>:
[QUOTE]My FI is agnostic. I'm atheist or agnostic, depending on my mood., but raised Catholic. We are having a Catholic wedding, as I consider myself culturally Catholic and the tradition of a church wedding is important to me. My FMIL is born-again Christian. She HATES that we are having a Catholic wedding, to the extent that she tried to forbid it. She also doesn't like me, but whatever. FMIL says that she will drop the fight against a Catholic wedding as long as FI and I go talk to her priest. <strong>I assume he's going to do his best to get us to accept Jesus Christ as our lord and savior</strong>. Not gonna happen. :p In order to make FMIL happy, I have to play nice and pretend like I don't think that believing the dinosaurs were on Noah's ark is absolutely psychotic. Did I mention that we are spending the whole Thanksgiving holiday with them? Oh, and she wants us to surprise her side of the family with the announcement. They all think I'm a terrible person. Kill me. Please.
Posted by kaitlyn142[/QUOTE]

I wouldn't just assume thats how it will go down. Not all Christians are psychotic and pushy like others make us look. :)
Why does she want you to talk to her priest though?

Good luck spending the holidays with them.

LesPaul · November 2010

I don't understand how you can consider yourself athiest/agnostic (as the mood strikes), yet feel compelled to have a Catholic wedding. I also don't think a Catholic priest would be comfortable performing your ceremony given the beliefs you and your FI hold - not a decent priest, anyway. WTF?

kaitlyn142 · November 2010

I know what's involved for a Catholic wedding. I'm fine with that. As far as any priest for our wedding is concerned, I'm Catholic. Confirmed and everything.

This is the priest trying to convert me to born-again status. I am very, very against Creationist teachings. The United States is so far behind the rest of the world in science education, and religious nuts like him try to force schools to "teach the controversy."

Nebb · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:154ca13c-f154-444b-8c40-1b009f466b71">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]I know what's involved for a Catholic wedding. I'm fine with that. As far as any priest for our wedding is concerned, I'm Catholic. Confirmed and everything. :) This is the priest trying to convert me to born-again status. I am very, very against Creationist teachings. The United States is so far behind the rest of the world in science education, and religious nuts like him try to force schools to "teach the controversy."
Posted by kaitlyn142[/QUOTE]
Why dont you get married in Finland then?

anna.oskar · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:154ca13c-f154-444b-8c40-1b009f466b71">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]I know what's involved for a Catholic wedding. I'm fine with that. As far as any priest for our wedding is concerned, I'm Catholic. Confirmed and everything. :) This is the priest trying to convert me to born-again status. I am very, very against Creationist teachings. The United States is so far behind the rest of the world in science education, and religious nuts like him try to force schools to "teach the controversy."
Posted by kaitlyn142[/QUOTE]

You might be fine with it. The question is whether the church will be. If you are against the teachings of a certain church, you shouldn't attend.

i'm confused. I thought you said you had yet to meet with a priest. If that's the case, i find it odd that you'd presume to know future the mind and actions of a man strong in his faith in God when you've professed that you are not.

anna.oskar · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:536ff872-1c2e-428e-85da-0147d71cbca8">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FML : Why dont you get married in Finland then?
Posted by Nebb[/QUOTE]

And that's why you were listed as the smartest on the poll. :) Here i am arguing and you came up with an easy obvious answer.

LesPaul · November 2010

You were confirmed when you were, what - about 13? Obviously your beliefs have changed significantly since then. You and FI are not likely to make it through the pre-Cana classes that the Catholic church requires.

Nebb · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:f9cd8d03-c335-4bd5-bf45-91bec98afa0a">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FML : And that's why you were listed as the smartest on the poll. :) Here i am arguing and you came up with an easy obvious answer.
Posted by anna.oskar[/QUOTE]
I figured logic wouldnt work with her, so I would start giving her alternate options!

Im still curious why theyre having a religious ceremony AT ALL if theyre both athiest/agnostic.

kaitlyn142 · November 2010

Stacy, I know that's what he's going to try to do because FMIL has made my FI go talk to him in an effort to get him back on the straight and narrow. The pastor spent the whole time trying to explain things like how all the animals (including the dinosaurs) fit on Noah's ark because they were babies and took up less space. Seriously.

katiewhompus · November 2010

I'm also surprised that your priest would allow two non-Catholics (by faith) to get married in a religious ceremony of the church. H is Catholic but because I was not we were not able to get married in his church unless I converted. Sil was married in the church and she/bil had to attend a good 6 months worth of classes before the priest would marry them.

anna.oskar · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:6a0a5689-5e54-4759-8f1b-59c4570c9029">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FML : I figured logic wouldnt work with her, so I would start giving her alternate options! <strong>Im still curious why theyre having a religious ceremony AT ALL if theyre both athiest/agnostic.</strong>
Posted by Nebb[/QUOTE]

As am I. I'm religious but as a Lutheran, I wouldn't feel comfortable faking it to get married in the catholic church.

Nebb · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:468f760a-bc87-4b87-92d3-9536a80e8fde">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]Stacy, I know that's what he's going to try to do because FMIL has made my FI go talk to him in an effort to get him back on the straight and narrow. The pastor spent the whole time trying to explain things like how all the animals (including the dinosaurs) fit on Noah's ark because they were babies and took up less space. Seriously.
Posted by kaitlyn142[/QUOTE]
You say that like talking about baby animals is a bad thing. So you hate jesus AND baby animals?!

katiewhompus · November 2010

Ok second question.

Wouldn't a born again Christian be happy with a Catholic wedding? I mean, I know there are different foundations/traditions/dogma but I would think a Catholic ceremony would be better (to a Christian) than a purely secular one.

kaitlyn142 · November 2010

It's not like I'm posting on the Catholic board here, people. As I told my FMIL, me having a Catholic wedding isn't actually up for debate.

anna.oskar · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:d5da2674-1850-4d80-96b0-5f9d31f52861">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FML : You say that like talking about baby animals is a bad thing. So you hate jesus AND baby animals?!
Posted by Nebb[/QUOTE]

I can forgive the Jesus hate (it's one of the things people learn in church) but baby animals???!?

Soulless.

Santa and Jesus dig the baby animals

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Nebb · November 2010

WHHYYYYYY though? Are you going to answer any questions? This must be why your FMIL doesnt like you.

anna.oskar · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:a43c677c-1b46-48ec-83c6-ceaa9849af14">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]It's not like I'm posting on the Catholic board here, people. As I told my FMIL, me having a Catholic wedding isn't actually up for debate.
Posted by kaitlyn142[/QUOTE]

Good. Because I'm not catholic.

Did you come here for a pity party? Because baby animal hating is NOT the way to get one.

kaitlyn142 · November 2010

Why am I having a Catholic wedding? I can respect a 2000 year old tradition and my family going back a couple hundred years without believe in the Jesus McNugget.

kaitlyn142 · November 2010

I feel the need to point out that I do actually love baby animals. They just weren't on Noah's ark.

LesPaul · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:6d2a87b2-25ad-47b0-985b-1951182ad552">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]Why am I having a Catholic wedding? I can respect a 2000 year old tradition and my family going back a couple hundred years without believe in the Jesus McNugget. :p
Posted by kaitlyn142[/QUOTE]

This statement alone is enough for your priest to tell you "No, thanks. Please get married elsewhere".

Nebb · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:3108a1fa-265c-4b0d-93e7-963dea66fabb">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]I feel the need to point out that I do actually love baby animals. They just weren't on Noah's ark.
Posted by kaitlyn142[/QUOTE]
How do you know, were you there?

J&K10910 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:6d2a87b2-25ad-47b0-985b-1951182ad552">Re: FML</a>:
First off, this is quite possibly one of the most ridiculous things I've seen in at least a week.

Second, this:
[QUOTE]Why am I having a Catholic wedding? I can respect a 2000 year old tradition and my family going back a couple hundred years without <strong>believe in the Jesus McNugget. :p</strong>
Posted by kaitlyn142[/QUOTE]
is horribly disrespectful to any Christians that might be here.

LesPaul · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:0f691369-4420-4e50-8fa4-539e7cf589a4">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FML : First off, this is quite possibly one of the most ridiculous things I've seen in at least a week. Second, this: is horribly disrespectful to any Christians that might be here.
Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]

Yes, it is.

kimheartsscott · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:5f7636bc-db89-4f9b-85f3-f369b843c784">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]My main concern is how are you going to TRUTHFULLY say your vows when you they contain: "Will you accept children lovingly from God, and bring them up according to the law of Christ and his Church?" "Take this ring as a sign of my love and fidelity. In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit."
Posted by 1ofThoseDays[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I really doubt she's thought that far ahead. I think she's probably thinking mostly about her backdrop.

</div>

Nebb · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:cb4aa759-9937-4246-bce6-4bb1d008a510">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FML : She won't be able to and her marriage will be founded on a sham and lies.
Posted by anna.oskar[/QUOTE]
but she will have pretty photos!!!

avsfan33 · November 2010

If you aren't Catholic, why do you need a Catholic wedding? You're beyond disrespectful.

anna.oskar · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_fml-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:3fc8d3ab-65b5-4ff1-8bc6-970955c1df89Post:54af3489-4d79-4d64-b171-8f29cd25e049">Re: FML</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FML : but she will have pretty photos!!!
Posted by Nebb[/QUOTE]

That's true! Hopefully with a giant jesus statue and crosses in the background of all of them.

LesPaul · November 2010

Respecting a tradition does not mean that you pretend to believe in the principles and covenants of that particular faith. It's called 'faith' for a reason - it's what you really believe in your soul, not what you go along with for a day to please someone in your family or to get good pictures in a cathedral. You are incredibly disrespectful of the Catholic church, and Christianity in general. Please reconsider your wedding plans, and get married in the parking lot of your local Target store.

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