Adoption

mrsLesGrossman · September 2009

I am watching Ellen now and Katherine Heigl announced that she is adopting a baby from Korea. This is kind of a poll or just say how you feel but I'm wondering- How do you feel about adoption? Would you prefer domestic or foreign adoption and why? Do you think foreign adoption is more of a fad for a designer kind of child or is it popular because of the need? Would you adopt a special needs child?

mrsLesGrossman · September 2009

second to last- should have said ...the need for adoption in foreign countries?

ilovemyco · September 2009

I think adoption is great. I wouldn't care where my baby came from foreign or domestic. I do think it is a fad among celbs. It takes a special person to adopt a special needs child. I would have to really think about it. But it wouldn't automatically be a no.

hopienpaulie · September 2009

My FI and I are thinking of adopting his niece b/c her mom just got arrested for attacking us and has abused that poor little girl. She is technically our foster child now, but we want to adopt her. Where the child is from does not matter, a child is a child. I think foreign adoption is more of a fad I would adopt a special needs child...in high school I did an internship at a special needs school and fell in love with the little ones.

ggmae · September 2009

I saw this on television today as well. I love that her reasoning for the adoption is because her sister was adopted from Korea and she feels compelled to adopt from there as well.To answer your questions:How do you feel about adoption? I think it's a great thing.Would you prefer domestic or foreign adoption and why? I really would have no preference.Do you think foreign adoption is more of a fad for a designer kind of child or is it popular because of the need? It seems to be a popular thing to do - there are so many American children who need homes, yet those I know who have adopted have adopted foreign children.Would you adopt a special needs child? Yes.

tlv204 · September 2009

How do you feel about adoption? Love it in general, a lot better than a lot of other options.Would you prefer domestic or foreign adoption and why? It wouldn't matter I don't think.Do you think foreign adoption is more of a fad for a designer kind of child or is it popular because of the need? I think it started because of the need/sheer amount of foreign babies up for adoption, but now I think celebrities are starting to do it as part of their publicity. Would you adopt a special needs child? That's a great question. I probably would depending on the situation, but I would have to think about it a lot more beforehand to make sure I had the time and money available to care for the child as well as possible.

fangsiting · September 2009

How do you feel about adoption? Love it. Would rather adopt than have a baby.Would you prefer domestic or foreign adoption and why? either. I'd like to adopt a little girl from China, but FI is Chinese & we'd teach her the language & culture. That's my own concern with foreign adoption--when the parents don't teach the child about her country of birth.Do you think foreign adoption is more of a fad for a designer kind of child or is it popular because of the need? Both. It was popular before Angelina Jolie made foreign babies the new black, but I think she also made it "cool"Would you adopt a special needs child? no, I'm selfish. I'll admit that.

pumpkinpumpkin · September 2009

How do you feel about adoption? I think the concept is fabulous. There are so many people out there who cannot have children. Would you prefer domestic or foreign adoption and why? I don't "prefer" either per se. If I were do adopt my own, it would be domestic. Where I live, a child who is a different race than their parents would have a good chance of being bullied, etc. Do you think foreign adoption is more of a fad for a designer kind of child or is it popular because of the need? I think it's a bit of both. I think that a lot of celebs to it to make themselves look as though they are rescuing a child from a torn country. Would you adopt a special needs child?

Travis&Cari · September 2009

It's important. FI and I are planning on having one biological child and adopting one.I have no preference. If I wasn't planning on telling the child they were adopted I guess I would want on that looked more like me.I guess I could see it as a fad because of all the celebs, but overall, no I don't think foreign adoption is a fad. I think it's popular because of the need.I don't know that I could be a good parent to a child with special needs. Of course if I had a child with special needs I would love them and do what I need to do to ensure they have a healthy and happy life. However, at this point in my life I don't know that I would choose to adopt a special needs child now. I could see maybe being ready and able in about 10 years when we are more stable in many aspects of our lives.

maggyruth · September 2009

How do you feel about adoption? Adoption is a great thing.Would you prefer domestic or foreign adoption and why? Either. Domestic-less likelihood of a language barrier. Foreign-due to my heritage, I would have a greater chance at being able to adopt a Lithuanian child, regardless of my marital status (though I would be limited to children 6 and older if I were single at the time of adoption)Do you think foreign adoption is more of a fad for a designer kind of child or is it popular because of the need? I don't know that I would use the term "designer", but I guess my thought is that it seems a bit more likely that you can get a baby when doing international adoption than doing domestic.Would you adopt a special needs child? It takes a special kind of person to do that, and I don't know that I'd be able to be that kind of person.

opalsky007 · September 2009

I think it's wonderful, and I think everyone should be able to. Gay, straight, single, whatever. I'm considering it even if we have kids of our own.I'd prefer domestic, because there are so many children in need here. I agree that there are many even needier children in other countries, but think we need to take care of those here first. I don't think it's a fad. I grew up with plenty of kids adopted from other places.Perhaps, depending on how capable I would be to properly care for them.

ac_in_dc · September 2009

I think adoption is wonderful. DH and his sister are both adopted and it's been awesome to see the relationship they have with their parents. Because of this, though, I feel less inclined to adopt, for DH's sake, not my own. I'd really like for him to have someone in his life that he has a genetic link to, even if it meant that we'd get a surrogate or something. Foreign adoption is popular b/c there are fewer adoptable babies in the US than there used to be. I'm not sure if I would adopt a special-needs child. I'd have to think about that carefully. But who knows, I could give birth to a special needs child...

vallyhoo · September 2009

I don't know much about the adoption process in the U.S. based on personal experience, but friends that I've seen go through the process have said that it is very political and often times, very disheartening.I would prefer domestic adoption because I don't travel overseas. I will one day, for vacation, but not to adopt.When this story broke, I heard on the radio that the US celebrity rationale for adopting children from overseas is because if they adopt a child from within the US, there is a greater chance the birth parents will 'come out of the woodwork' and want to be in the child's life. Although I think it has become a fad.Absolutely.

Pirata13 · September 2009

My cousin and her husband adopted 2 kids from Guatemala. They were very pleased with the program--kids are placed with foster families until the are adopted, not put in orphanges. The reason they went international is this: In the U.S. every state has a turn-around period where the birth mother can change her mind and take the baby back. Some it's 24 hours, others 3 months. So imagine the idea of having a baby in your arms for hours or months and having at the last minute, that child taken back. That happened to a friend of theirs and they didn't want to take that emotional risk. So that is why they did international adoption, and why several of their friends have too.

Kati0105 · September 2009

How do you feel about adoption? I think adoption is great. I plan to adopt if I have two biological children of the same gender, as I want to raise children of both genders but don't believe in reproducing more than twice.Would you prefer domestic or foreign adoption and why? I see benefits in both, so no preference.Do you think foreign adoption is more of a fad for a designer kind of child or is it popular because of the need? Both to some extent. I think some people choose foreign adoption for moral and political reasons where as others have been swept up in the trend.Would you adopt a special needs child? Depends. If I had two other children I would probably not, as I would question my ability to parent two additional children plus a special needs child. If I discovered I was unable to have children I would consider adopting a special needs child.I do have to say that despite my general dislike of Katherine Heigl I think her motivation for adoption is very respectable and it makes me think more highly of her. And I give her props for quitting smoking before she receives the child.

Kati0105 · September 2009

Ugh sorry I am a serial thread breaker.

mocha beans · September 2009

I feel adoption is a great option to have.If we were to adopt, I don't think it would really matter honestly. I think I might prefer a domestic adoption, but I certainly wouldn't be against foreign adoption if it came up.I think the the increase is more of a fad, probably brought on by the Jolie/Pitt clan. But there may also be an increased need which those who have influence have seen, and have used their influence to direct others to do the same.I probably wouldn't. I will be honest and say I would probably not have the patience, emotional stability or nurturing instinct to deal with a special needs child. Just not the best idea for me.

mandapanda78 · September 2009

FI and I are in negotiations to have one bio child and adopt a child. It's important to him to have a biological son because FI his the last man in his family. He know's it's archaic and silly but he'd love to keep the family alive in more than just name. Not sure I have a preference for one kind of adoption over another. I haven't researched it enough to know which would suit our situation better.I don't think foreign adoption is a fad. At least I hope not. These are children, not puppies.Depends on what their needs were. My cousin just adopted from China and got fasttracked because he was willing to adopt a little girl with a cleft palette. A simple surgery will fix it, but she was considered "special needs".

mrsLesGrossman · September 2009

GG, her adopted daughter is also a special needs child. I would have probably judged her for not considering domestic adoption until I heard this. How do you feel about adoption? we are hoping to adopt at least two childrenWould you prefer domestic or foreign adoption and why? I would prefer domestic because there are a lot of children forced into the foster care system because they were never adopted Do you think foreign adoption is more of a fad for a designer kind of child or is it popular because of the need? I think it is a total fad in some situations like looking for a very white Eastern European baby or straight couples looking to adopt in general. There is no reason that they can't find a baby here. I know a lot of same sex couples that have issues adopting here and I understand their reasoning for going foreign. I can't understand someone like Madonna who adopted an African baby when there are plenty of African American babies available. I feel bad for minority children who are looked over here. Would you adopt a special needs child? yes

pumpkinpumpkin · September 2009

Oh, and I wouldn't adopt a special needs child. It's wrong, and judge me for it, but I wouldn't.

[Deleted User] · September 2009

what does this have to do with 9/11?

ggmae · September 2009

E - That's right, she did say that.

laladypoet · September 2009

damn, daff beat me.

adelheidster · September 2009

How do you feel about adoption? I think it is a good option to consider when planning a family. FI and I would like to conceive our children naturally, but have discussed adoption as a possibility if we can't.Would you prefer domestic or foreign adoption and why? No preference at this time, though that might change if I were to actually start the adoption process and see what is all involved for both.Do you think foreign adoption is more of a fad for a designer kind of child or is it popular because of the need? It appears like a fad now, but most of the people I know that have been adopted are from foreign adoptions, and that was long before the celebs made it popular.Would you adopt a special needs child? Probably not. I think it is great for those that do, but I have zero experience with special needs children so I do not feel that I would be able to provide them with the level of care they require. I know I can learn, but I'm selfish I guess.

ac_in_dc · September 2009

I may consider adopting after we have a genetic child. I haven't thought about it too much.When I was single, the thought crossed my mind of adopting a toddler on my own...I figured I'd wait until I turned 38 or so, then start investigating options if I didn't have a partner. I have the financial means to do it, but I'm not so sure if I'd have the emotional strength to go it alone.

mrsLesGrossman · September 2009

It has nothing to do with 9/11, thanks for playing. I'm trying to stay on either something light or what ever keeps me from thinking about it. It was a very heavy and emotional morning at the memorial so my brain needs to rest.

lyndausvi · September 2009

How do you feel about adoption? I think it's great thing. But I do not see myself doing it.Would you prefer domestic or foreign adoption and why? if we did adopt it would not matter where they child care from as long as it was a legal adoptionDo you think foreign adoption is more of a fad for a designer kind of child or is it popular because of the need? I went to school with foreign adopted kids 25+ years ago. So no I do not see it as a fad for normal people. Maybe it's a fad for celebraties. Would you adopt a special needs child? NO. Honestly I'm not even sure how good of a parent I'm going to be for a 'normal' child, I'm not going to put myself in a harder position than I think I can handle.

mandapanda78 · September 2009

And maybe I need to put this in the "why I'm a terrible person" column, but I hate how much people who adopt have to prove themselves and are tested when people who have bio kids can just pop them out with no consideration about whether they will be a good parent or not. I know it's unrealistic to think people should be tested for parenting skills, but it just drives me nuts when people who would be great parents do 3 cycles of IVF and can't conceive while trailer trash Sally gets knocked up in one try.Sorry, that vent has actually been brewing up for a while.

ExpatPumpkin · September 2009

Speaking of adoption, I just recently saw this on our wedding photographer's blog: [url]http://jaredwilsonphotography.com/index.cfm?catID=2[/url] We knew they were trying to adopt, and had been waiting for over a year for the paperwork to be processed, etc. The story of their meeting in pictures is right below the Brides & Blooms entry. Absolutely beautiful!

punkyb2b · September 2009

1. Its the only way I will have children.2. Either. depends on what a person wants their family to consist of or how old they are when they decide to adopt, etc. Its harder to adopt healthy infants here than abroad. Some countries have an easier adoption process than others. Some couples are biracial or bicultural which could be a factor for them. 3. Maybe a fad among celebs but not so much among regular folks.4. I dealt with special needs children in my career. Its a tough tough card. I would have to think long and hard about it. and it depends on the special need.

SwedishChick2011 · September 2009

How do you feel about adoption? I think it's a great thing.Would you prefer domestic or foreign adoption and why? It depends on the family and circumstances.Do you think foreign adoption is more of a fad for a designer kind of child or is it popular because of the need? I think most people do it because there is a need and they may not have to deal with an open adoption or something. Would you adopt a special needs child? probably not, but I would definitely respect someone who did

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