Wedding Etiquette Forum

Am I just being bitter?!?!

I just want to vent and get some opinions...invitations for my bach party and my bridal shower were sent out couple weeks ago..NOBODY rsvp'd so first of all i had to track everyone down just to find out 90% of them arent coming. i may just be being selfish..but really is it too much for me to ask for a couple hours of your precious day to hang out with me before i make the biggest commitment of my life?!? it just really irritated me that not only did i have to track these people down..but just for them to tell me sorry im not coming. we even had to cancel part of my bach party because people arent coming!!!!!! i want to scream at all of them and tell them fine..DONT EXPECT ME WHEN YOU GET MARRIED! ugh..am i  just being crazy?!?!
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Re: Am I just being bitter?!?!

  • Yes.
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  • So what you're saying is you planned your own b-party?!
  • It's understandable to be a little disappointed,  but yeah, you're acting a little crazy.
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  • Why am I not shocked? And why are you tracking these people down for your own parties? That's not your job.
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  • Is it possible that they are avoiding you because you're acting like a nutjob?
  • I understand your disappointment, but yes, you are overreacting. And why were you tracking down the RSVPs for your shower and bach party? Aren't the hosts supposed to do that?
  • What were the party plans?  Was it too expensive?  Did it require oot travel?
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  • really is it too much for me to ask for a couple hours of your precious day to hang out with me before i make the biggest commitment of my life?!? You're kidding, right?I had three girls for to my bachelor party and it was actually a party for another close friend because she had won a modeling contract so we kind of partied with her and it was very anti-bachelorette and very much not about me, but I had an amazing time. Get over it.
  • Well I think you are justified in being upset and disappointed but you certainly shouldn't be the one calling them.  Talk to the few girls that could make it, maybe plan (or better yet, have a BM plan!) an informal girls night for drinks or dinner. 
  • I get being disappointed in having to call your friends and having low attendance, but I think you might need to tone it down a little.  Usually it's not a personal reason why people don't show up.  Be careful not to be spiteful about it.
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  • You're not really entitled to any pre-wedding parties. It's nice that a friend felt like planning them for you (a friend DID plan them, right? Not you?), but no one is really obligated to attend.
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  • Why on earth were you tracking down RSVPs for your own bachelorette party?  That's not supposed to be something that you have any involvement in planning.You sound like a little ray of sunshine.  No wonder your friends are dying to hang out with you.
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  • Whoa, simmer down.
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  • Yeah, this is what happens when you plan parties for yourself. Although I guess they owed you the courtesy of RSVPing "no". But you can't really expect others to adhere to etiquette if you do not.
  • I am just going to sit back and watch this one.....
  • Hm.. post and run?  People do have their own lives, ya know?
  • WOW... breath and remember no one cares as much about your special day as you do. They are your friends but they have lives. You act like they must drop everything and stand around & tell you how amazing you are for getting married.

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  • Disappointed?  Understood.Bitter?  Not cool.
  • No one even offered to set up a B-Party for me. Can I go boo-hooing all over the boards now?
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  • I call troll.  Not every post about something silly is from a troll.  Look at her other posts and slow your roll before jumping. 
  • Deep. Breath.  Its gonna be alright.  You arent crazy.  When the van shows up and people try to put a funny white jacket on you, its okay, you are just gonna go for a little ride.
  • Did you ever think that maybe they waited so long to RSVP because they were trying to figure out a way to attend?!?!  Maybe your harassing them made them decide not to try anymore because they felt you needed an answer immediately!!!  Perhaps you should calm down and have fun at whatever party you have!!!!!
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  • I call troll. Not every post about something silly is from a troll. Look at her other posts and slow your roll before jumping. Sorry, I didn't even bother to look at her other posts.  You're right, I should have though.
  • really is it too much for me to ask for a couple hours of your precious day to hang out with me before i make the biggest commitment of my life?!?Yes sometimes it is too much to ask.  Like I said I understand being disappointed, but you're not that special for getting married.  Loads of people do it every day.  It's not that important to anyone else, believe it or not, they're not just sitting around waiting for opportunities to congratulate you for a relatively normal step in life.
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  • Ummm  a 90% decline rate can mean a couple of things 1) it's on a bad night and something else is going on 2) It's too expensive 3) you are crazy and you do not have any real friends Unless of course you invited a 100 people which means you still have 10 people going which would be a good sized b-party.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Also, I would just like to re-iterate my yes.  In fact, I'd like to change it to a hell yes.
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  • Heeheehee biggest commitment of your life... from the age on your profile combined with your obvious maturity, I would guess the last "biggest commitment of your life" was which color tassels to put on your two wheeler.
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  • Quite friendly on here arent we? NO i didnt plan either of my parties. I planned NOTHING. both parties planning these for me asked me to track people down because i talk to them most. and NO i dont expect people to drop their lives to come hang out with me, but an RSVP would be nice. I have been a VERY calm bride until this point. its just very irritating to me that people cant simply rsvp so i dont have to track them down and get upset with the responses.and post and run..really?! there were like 19 posts in about 2 minutes. give me a minute to read them!
  • from the age on your profile combined with your obvious maturity, I would guess the last "biggest commitment of your life" was which color tassels to put on your two wheeler.HA!!!
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    If I wanted to hear the pitter-patter of little feet, I'd put shoes on the cat. image

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