anyone cant stand your inlaws?

NuggetBrain · September 2009

Honestly, it's not like they paid to have a carriage and 6 horses pull you guys up to the wedding, and a pallet borne by 8 half naked footmen to bring you guys into the reception hall. Or for a bald eagle release after the ceremony, or IPods for favors. It's just some cheese and crackers. Chill the hell out.

sammyjo0320 · September 2009

lyndausvi..if you cant say anything nice JUST ONCE..why even bother posting on here? you dont like me that much..dont read my posts. plain and simple.

nda_roxybabe · September 2009

No, I'm sorry, it does look like you're complaining about them spending money. I read it, more than once. Theres no way to deal with in laws you don't care for other than to "just deal". It is what it is.

MeaghanandMichael · September 2009

i asked for opinions on how to deal with my in laws. and your problem with them was pushing expensive add ons to your wedding on you. we told you how we felt about that. capiche?

vicmo5 · September 2009

How does you fi feel about the situation?

jasmineh7777 · September 2009

Wanna trade FMIL?

tidetravel · September 2009

i asked for opinions on how to deal with my in lawsNo, you said your FMIL was this horrible woman, and then used the fact that she OFFERED to pay for stuff related to YOUR pretty princess party as evidence of such.You wanna deal with your inlaws? Either decline their offers of money, or learn to say "Thank you" graciously.

LarissaAnn · September 2009

"i asked for opinions on how to deal with my in laws." And I gave you mine: Say "thank you" and get over yourself.

buttaflai · September 2009

This post proves that we have yet to see it all.

ac_in_dc · September 2009

Well, see, the only stuff you were specific about were the cheese trays. So that's what we responded to. You say she's pushy and opinionated and thinks she's better than everyone else, then you tell us about a gift she gave you. Sounds generous to me.If you want validation, give us a real example of her being pushy and opinionated.

swans alive · September 2009

I reread your post twice. You DO seem like you're complaining that they're spending money on you. We don't know the backstory, all we know is what you write in the post -- and your OP makes you sound like an ungrateful brat. If you don't want their money thrown in your face, then why did you accept their money to begin with? Oh and also -- you don't get to determine our responses. You thought the problem was your inlaws, we thought the problem was your attitude, so we commented on that.

betrothed123 · September 2009

Your OP was clearly bitching about them "flaunting" their money. The proof you provided was them paying for a few extras in your wedding.I'm lucky in that my MIL is a saint. I love her to death. She's such an amazing woman.Sadly, my FIL is the exact opposite. I can't stand him. Do you know how I deal? I keep my mouth shut about what bothers me about him with H. When we go see him I put a smile on my face and do my best to not let him know that he's not my favorite person in the world.

nda_roxybabe · September 2009

[i]i hate that i dont like her..but she just doesnt make it easy![/i] Saying that ^ after mentioning how she offered to buy the cheese tray and pay for rehearsal dinner make it look like you're complaining about those things. Hence, where everyone comments came from. Give us better reasons why you "hate" her and maybe we will give you better validation

lyndausvi · September 2009

I have a feeling your in-laws in a no win sitatution. If they pay for something they are throwing around their money. If they don't they they are douche bags for having the money and not wanting to contribute. I really think you are somehow jealous or just uncomforatable with their money. And I get that. But just step back and look at their life. I bet you will see this is normal spending for them. Once you understand them, it will not even phase you in the future. Of course you will not read this.

J&K10910 · September 2009

Wanna know how I deal with FFIL? He's abrasive, rude, drinks too much, asks the same questions over and over, berates his wife's (amazing) cooking. And I smile, say thank you for dinner, it was very good, and answer the same questions over and over. Because it's my FI's dad. And he's not doing anything to hurt me or FI or our relationship. So I put up with him when I have to for the sake of FI. Happy, brat?

*BeachBride0410* · September 2009

The fact is, you may think you are being grateful, but you really aren't. I am sure you appreciate them helping, but hate the fact she bought the cheese tower for $1000. You can't have it both ways, you cant say you are grateful they are helping but complain she spent $1000 on the cheese....that is not being grateful. You need to either appreciate what they are buying with the money, or you need to decline their gesture and pay for the things on your own. You can't dictate what the money is being used for.

lyndausvi · September 2009

Lynda- I reconize the name too with that same thought but I can't remember what it was about....help? I think it was a post about her shower and b-party and 90% of the people declined or something like that. I get being disappointed but just like this post she comes across bratty.

nda_roxybabe · September 2009

Ohh yes, I think that was it. I just remember the name because "jo" is my middle name but I remeber connecting brattyness to it...

NuggetBrain · September 2009

I am so glad that Noodle's parents are awesome. Even though his dad is grossly inappropriate and borderline offensive. But in a really, really funny way because he's not actually my dad, so I can laugh at him.

junelley · September 2009

I was going to say that maybe OP's FMIL wasn't paying to be generous but wants some strings attached, but it seems that's not the case. Maybe the OP just doesn't like FMIL's view on money, how she wastes it and not very wise about it and it reflect how she is as person (different values)? If that is the case, it is understandable, but since this is for the wedding, let her be generous for you on your big day and accept it graciously. After the wedding, avoid her if you don't like her as a person.

ac_in_dc · September 2009

My in-laws are pretty awesome, too. Now my parents are another story entirely...

wadingmoose · September 2009

Mmmm $1000 worth of cheese, crackers and fruit. I fail to see the problem here. Is this more than the rest of your wedding budget? Look, you won't get a lot of sympathy here since a lot of folks here paid for their own wedding OR graciously accepted whatever help their families wanted to offer.I like my in-laws. They're ridiculously sweet and welcoming and I've never for a moment felt excluded from their lives.

sunflower1998 · September 2009

I've seen pretty much every Everybody Loves Raymond episode, and I can't recall any time that Ray's parents "showed off" their money.

lpstl · September 2009

#1. I want cheese and crackers now. Badly.#2. I read your OP twice, carefully, thinking I must have missed something. What I got from it was you don't like your FMIL because she's pushy, a show off, and opinionated, but the example you gave was her spending extra money on your wedding. If she's really horrible, you need to come up with better examples. Based upon your OP you sound like the problem, not her.#3. When my sister got married I was in a situation to be very generous financially. She and her H didn't have a lot of money at the time, and I knew they could use the help. I probably dropped 6k on wedding related things. I didn't do it to show off (exactly what do you think your FMIL is going to do, put a sign on the cheese and crackers saying she paid for it??), I did it because I could and I love my sister. Have you considered the possibility that your FMIL's motivation is the same?

rands09 · September 2009

What rude, insensitive comments to Sammjo...I understand that people have different points of view, but really, people - if you really just want to dump on someone, please do us all a favor and just read the post and move on...spare the rest of us from your caustic, rude, in your face comments. There are actually some of us who visit the boards to try to offer constructive ideas, or to to just offer encouragement when someone needs to vent, as it seems that SJ needed to do. A little compassion, please. If you are truly brides who are posting, then you know how emotionally charged a time this can be. It would be nice if everyone could just take the magic pill that makes us all knowing and full of wisdom. For those who can't, and just need a place to air things out, please allow them that space.

nda_roxybabe · September 2009

Rands09- Have you not lurked or posted on this board before? If you want to see puppies and rainbows go to "just engaged"

tidetravel · September 2009

[i]It would be nice if everyone could just take the magic pill that makes us all knowing and full of wisdom[/i] It would be better if OP could take a pill and suddenly not be a bridezilla. Unfortunately, said pill does not exist. Hence, she gets the 2nd best thing - a dose of reality.

tamgotwitz · September 2009

Oh look! It's Tide and the Self-Righteous Moronathon Squad at it again! Since you ran away from the last thread with your tail between your legs, I guess we'll have to just pick it up from here. "Warning: Posts will be answered in the manner in which they were perceived." Again... YOUR PERCEPTIONS DO NOT DICTATE REALITY. So let me get this straight: You read a few hastily written sentences and are now convinced that this person has the "WRONG!" idea about her in-laws and is 'Gonna Get the SMACKDOWN!' from all of you with your so-called "reality"? Here's a reality check for all of you: Your experiences (and thus the opinions you've formed from them) are not necessarily the same as the rest of the people in this world. All throughout these threads there are these tid-bits about how, "I once did the same thing for my sister" or "If I had done that to my FILs... OMG!". That's great... but guess what? This poster is not you. Their life and their situation, is not yours. If you don't relate to the way the post comes across to you, then don't respond. More than likely, the way you read between the lines and the assumptions you made about this person (based entirely off the way you've all responded to other posts) is not at all the way the post was intended. If nothing else, your self-fulfilling and injudicious tirades towards total strangers is childish, absurd, and unacceptable. I could post the "Why are Brides attacking Brides" quote again...

tidetravel · September 2009

Just because I stop responding to a post doesn't mean that I "ran away with my tail between my legs." Contrary to popular belief, I don't spend my entire life on theknot. And when you come late to a post, well, then, you can't really expect people to continue to comment on it - especially after it's off the first page and 3/4 of the way down the list of posts responded to. That being said, I don't know what the fuuck your problem is with me in particular - I didn't say anything different than what another 60 posters said. As far as perception vs. reality - you come here for advice, we can only give it based on information being provided. If you come off like a whiny entitled brat, then that's probably what you're gonna hear back. If you come here and present a problem in a rational manner, you will get rational responses. Pretty simple concept really. We're not mean for the sake of being mean. While we may sound harsh, I guarantee you that if OP goes and voices her EXACT complaint (without any other information, just as we have here) to her friends and family, they will smile and comfort her to her face, but say the exact same things we are saying behind her back. We're not into validation and we're not here to be a big loving community of women that sing kumbaya and overlook bad behavior because someone may be in a "delicate" state.

salt78 · September 2009

I didn't see this post earlier, but the OP is a twit.

anyone cant stand your inlaws?

Re: anyone cant stand your inlaws?

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