Hurt Feelings... Am I wrong?

star_524 · October 2009

So I just ran into an issue with one of my BM, who is one of my best friends. Let me give you some back ground, I have been engaged since January and am planning for 10.9.10. My BM got engaged last week and informed me today that they are now getting married in July, three months before me. Previously they were planning a destination wedding and now are planning a HUGE wedding here. I admit my feelings were really hurt by this. Especially after she went on and on about how planning is so horrible and she doesnt care about any of it, the colors, flowers, details, and that all she wants to do is show up, and that she just wants it to be over already... Please put me in my place, how should I be reacting to this?

aligrrl80 · October 2009

yes, you're wrong.

lmydogally · October 2009

Why does it bother you that she is getting married in July?

the_mulva · October 2009

you're mad that your BFF is having a big grand wedding? wtf?

star_524 · October 2009

no not that she is getting married in July or that she is having a big grand wedding that she is having hers 3 months before mine when I have been planning for months. And the fact that she isnt excited about it at all. I feel like she tried to do it so she beat me. Especially when she told me in and email and quote......"We decided to get married next July.......... SO IM GETTING MARRIED FIRST!!" those were her exact words..

PDXPhotoGrl · October 2009

Get over it.

star_524 · October 2009

Thanks, I think maybe I just needed to put it out there so I wasnt stewing on it... I can deal. Thanks everyone!

jesibel14 · October 2009

Yes, you are wrong. You are mad that she is getting married 1 month before you, right? You wouldn't be mad if it was after... You prob see it as she is stealing your thunder... But shes not - she is just having her wedding before yours - who cares

I had friends go through something similar and honestly in hind sight it's laughable... It's not the "date" that counts! Be happy that she found Someone she loves enough to marry, just as you did, and please don't let it bother you... Good luck !

modb1rd · October 2009

I can totally see how one of your friends getting married before you and not caring at all about the wedding planning hurts your feelings. I mean she is devaluing everything you care about in this world. Doesn't she realize that you may only get to get married ONCE. And that the colors and the flowers and the other details are things that can't change once the wedding day is over and you are all married and stuff. It is your one chance to get it righ.

KayRI · October 2009

I always read BM as bowel movement.

aligrrl80 · October 2009

well, she sounds like a brat if she was being serious. and if she's a brat, probably no one really likes her. so don't act like a brat also and you'll be the one that has more friends, and will get better wedding presents. and then you win.

aligrrl80 · October 2009

kay, even after all these years, I do too.

tastyburger · October 2009

whaaa? this is a BLESSING. take notes during her nuptials and just make sure you do everything better! na-ne-na-na-boo-boo.

MamaKin · October 2009

two of my best friends from my "group" got engaged within 4 days of each other. i just attended one wedding about 3 weeks ago, and the other is 2 weeks from now. NO BIG DEAL. we've all made it to showers, bachelorette parties (one tomorrow!), weddings, etc to celebrate with everyone. there is no competition, and no one's feelings are hurt. and to be honest, as fun as the first one was (and it was amaaazing), now the only thing my friends are talking about is the next one and we haven't gotten to gush over the first like it probably deserved. so if you're still all butthurt about it, maybe that's a consolation.

megan1381 · October 2009

She doesn't care about who's wedding,hers or your own? Either way write her off as someone you can't count on. She is trying to one-up you. Change your wedding to June

CaliopeSpidrman · October 2009

If we can't count on our bridesmaids to do....umm...bridesmaidy things, the world will be launched into CHAOS.

mrstarawalsh · October 2009

Dude, who the hell cares? Get over it.

buddhagouda · October 2009

The only thing I brought away from this discussion was "Holy Hell PINK VELOUR TRACK SUIT"

FallinAgain · October 2009

I also enjoy the posed pg pic at 5 freaking weeks pg.

KristenBtobe · October 2009

A pink velour track suit is required first trimester garb, Buddha. Better read your handbook.

lmydogally · October 2009

My eye first went to the pink track suit and then the wood paneling walls. Not sure which is more disturbing.

orangejulius · October 2009

I agree with the girls who said this is a blessing. A friend of mine got engaged a month before me and still hasn't set a date! I mean, I know in the scheme of things it doesn't matter, but it's just annoying. I hope she sets it before mine!!

mrstarawalsh · October 2009

<3 velour, especially PINK velour. Heck, I didn't know I'd be a bloated pig at 5 weeks along, none of my clothes fit, gotta be comfy

lindsayll · October 2009

So I guess this means the vow renewal is off? Too bad, I was hoping you'd share pictures of it.And I've never understood pregnancy belly pics of bloat. I still don't feel rounded out enough to warrant a true belly pic.

mrstarawalsh · October 2009

Can't be a pretty princess when you're a pregnant pumpkin! Some back story: This is not my second or even third pregnancy. It's my sixth. My daughter, Lillianne, was born sleeping and after I had DS I had 3 miscarriages. Trust, I'd much rather have a baby than a vow renewal ceremony... even better that this one was a surprise since we had all but given up! I started taking pics as soon as I found out because I want to document this pregnancy, since it will be my last if I carry to term or not (I'm having a complete hysterectomy after). I was no where near as bloated last week! I was quite surprised this week.

FallinAgain · October 2009

I get wanting to document life events, I do. The downside of the internet is that people no longer have any sense that you do not have to share with the general public what you document.

mrstarawalsh · October 2009

Fallin: Seriously, I like the pic, who cares? I'm obviously excited about being pregnant, it's not unuseual to take weekly pregnancy pics. I don't see what the big deal is.

FallinAgain · October 2009

It's not a big deal. It's just odd to be posing like you're showing off a baby bump when you aren't showing at all yet. Your fetus is the size of a seed.

SarahBethBR · October 2009

My belly looks almost exactly like yours. I'm 0 weeks pregnant. I just think 5 weeks is early to be posting belly pictures. Maybe you ave bloat. Maybe you ate too many tacos. But you're not "showing."And yes, the pink J. Lo circa 2001 tracksuit just adds to the charm.

mrstarawalsh · October 2009

I know it's just bloat LOL. But actually did you know that during the 5-6th week of pregnancy that your uterus goes from the size of a fist to the size of a grapefruit?Also, the baby's not the size of a seed, it's the size of a raisen. PLUS since this is my 6th pregnancy, and I've carried 1 to term and 1 to the second trimester, it's not *that* uncommon for a woman who has had a child in their 5th week to be having a larger belly and it stays.

KristenBtobe · October 2009

I'm 15 weeks and not nearly that size. My SIL patted my belly the other night, I had to remind her she was just feeling my organs, not a baby yet.

Hurt Feelings... Am I wrong?

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