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AllAboutTheBenjamin
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Help me bring up a sensitive subject with my husband
I might be overthinking this because I'm a dental hygiene nut, but I'm really concerned about Ben's teeth. He probably hasn't been to a dentist in five or six years. I asked him last night when the last time was, and he just said, "I have no idea" and left the room, so I can tell he didn't really want to talk about it. And I don't want to feel like his mother or something, scolding him or trying to make him accountable for his oral health.
But I feel like my concerns are legit. If he can't remember the last time he's been to a dentist, I can only imagine what's going on in there... his teeth don't outwardly appear to be gross or anything, but he does drink a lot of soda (Mountain Dew especially). And I know that oral health can have a big impact on the health of the entire body. He does have dental benefits through his job, and I guess I don't know how good the benefits are but if you have those benefits, shouldn't you use them?
How would you bring it up? What would you say?
But I feel like my concerns are legit. If he can't remember the last time he's been to a dentist, I can only imagine what's going on in there... his teeth don't outwardly appear to be gross or anything, but he does drink a lot of soda (Mountain Dew especially). And I know that oral health can have a big impact on the health of the entire body. He does have dental benefits through his job, and I guess I don't know how good the benefits are but if you have those benefits, shouldn't you use them?
How would you bring it up? What would you say?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Help me bring up a sensitive subject with my husband
[QUOTE]I would tell him about the mouse that dissolved in mountain dew (somebody know what I'm talking about) and be all "THATS YOUR TEETH!"
Posted by kimheartsscott[/QUOTE]
I do.
I asked my Dew junkie co-workers if they'd heard about "the thing with the rodent in the Mountain Dew bottle" and they said no. So I didn't elaborate.
[QUOTE]I would tell him about the mouse that dissolved in mountain dew (somebody know what I'm talking about) and be all "THATS YOUR TEETH!"
Posted by kimheartsscott[/QUOTE]
I know what you're talking about. But it was actually a mouse that should have dissolved if the people suing had been telling the truth.
They claimed they found a mouse in there when they opened it. MT Dew was able to figure out when the can had been filled and they said that the mouse would hvae dissolved in there in that time, therefore proving the pepole wrong.
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Malcolm
my currently-reading shelf:
"Are you one of those vegetarian zombies that only eats grrrrrraaaaaaiiiinnnnnsssss?" -- raynes
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Malcolm
I was talking my dentist at my last check-up (when his hands weren't in my mouth...ha!) and he said that if you wait too long and then after 5-10 years decide you want to go and get all the stuff done, insurance won't cover it because you didn't try to prevent it from happening.
Which is total BS because that's why you have insurance, but he said he's seen it happen often. People wait 10 years, come in and need a ton of work and insurance straight up refuses to pay.
I always just book the appointment and let him know when to be there. I usually say something like, my dentist called me to remind me I am due for a cleaning and I remembered you haven't been in a little while so I booked you in on this day as well.
Its also my benefits that pay so I always tell him if he doesn't use them up they go back to the company and its like giving part of my pay away.
Malcolm
But he does the same to me, makes me go to the doc when I don't want to. Tough love and all. Now, if he was genuinely afraid of the dentist, it would be a different story and I'd be more compassionate. But a pride thing? Get over it and get your damn teeth cleaned.
my currently-reading shelf:
"Are you one of those vegetarian zombies that only eats grrrrrraaaaaaiiiinnnnnsssss?" -- raynes
**FOR SALE NOW**
By the time I got to the doctor I had to have a back tooth pulled. We (doc and me) started taking measures at that point to make sure I dont lose anymore.
I had to have 2 gum surgeries. Not pleasant at all. And I now have to get my teeth cleaned 4 times a year.
[QUOTE]If McLovin has a real fear of the dentist, maybe be like "Hey, there's one of those new <strong>'No Fear Dentistry' </strong>offices coming to our town next month. I hear they give you laughing gas even just for a cleaning. Want me to check it out?". Something like that.
Posted by mehgank[/QUOTE]
<div>Those things exist?! Really?! Why didn't I know about this? I would have gone to the dentist a lot earlier.</div>
Malcolm
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Help me bring up a sensitive subject with my husband : Those things exist?! Really?! Why didn't I know about this? I would have gone to the dentist a lot earlier.
Posted by SEWF[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>My dentist gives laughing gas if you have anxiety. Actually, the office is called "Bearable Dentistry." They're great with kids and people who have serious dentist fears.
</div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Help me bring up a sensitive subject with my husband : Those things exist?! Really?! Why didn't I know about this? I would have gone to the dentist a lot earlier.
Posted by SEWF[/QUOTE]
Yep! Living in Miami, we hear a lot of commercials for this type of thing down here, where businesses really cater to people in every way (for instance, there's an eye center that picks up their LASIK patients from their homes, takes them to surgery, and then brings them back home post-op, so they don't have to worry about driving).
I've also heard of it referred to as "sedation dentistry" too. There are all different forms: laughing gas, anesthesia (knock you out), or they'll simply prescribe you some Valium to take before your appointment.
my currently-reading shelf:
"Are you one of those vegetarian zombies that only eats grrrrrraaaaaaiiiinnnnnsssss?" -- raynes
**FOR SALE NOW**
I really don't know any good ways around getting him to go, unfortunately. H's tooth pain intervened for me (agonizing pain will do that to you, I guess). Maybe ask him why he's scared to go, and then see if you can't talk him into going. Or make an appointment for him. That's what I ended up doing in the end, I called the dentist and set up the appointment and drove him there. Sucks when you have to play "Mom", but teeth are just too damn important to ignore. GL.
Books read in 2012: 21/50
If that doesn't work, I would go for the money angle. Cleanings are free, but root canals are very expensive. Not only do you need the actual root canal done, but then you have to have a crown placed on the tooth and that will most likely need to be replaced at least once in your lifetime. The root canal and crown can easily cost over $1k per tooth. They also require several trips to the dentist to complete the work.
But what amys said about insurance not covering if it's been too long... omg. I shudder to think.
Books read in 2012: 21/50
[QUOTE]"I'm making an appointment to get my teeth cleaned next month, want me to make one for you too? We could go out to lunch after. It'll be a fun random weekday to spend together."
Posted by pirategal03[/QUOTE]
Great advice. That's how I get my FI to do most things he's aprehensive about. "I'm doing it, come along, we'll make a day of it and it will be fun!"
He doens't care though. He's always said the only reason he won't go is because he hates calling to make an appointment. It helps if I make them at the same time, since we carpool anyway.
He hadn't been to a dentist it probably 5-6 years, because he didn't have dental insurance. It took a few visits (and a few root canals and fillings), but his teeth are good now. And he goes every 6 months, because he doesn't want to go through that stuff again.
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[QUOTE]dmill, wow.
Posted by edielaura[/QUOTE]
Yep, I can't believe I was stupid enough to let fear cost me so much money. <div>
</div><div>I will say though that about a month after the wedding, I went to a Train concert and the lead singer took my camera and took a picture of both of us. My teeth were whiter than his, and I was more excited about having a brighter smile than a millionaire than I was about meeting the dude. LOL (I've never had my teeth whitened and I'm a smoker so at least my lack of caring for my teeth didn't result in dingy teeth)</div>