Wedding Woes

::TT::

You were supposed to speak with your OB today, right? How did it go?
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Re: ::TT::

  • thatgrrrrlthatgrrrrl member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    went well. He doesn't think I need meds at this point but he's getting me in touch with the therapy group at the hospital.
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  • loveshine1loveshine1 member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    That sounds like a step in the right direction. I'm glad you spoke with him.
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  • thatgrrrrlthatgrrrrl member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Me too.

    Also H and I did a lot of talking this weekend. I was even comfortable enough to fully confess to him how much I hate it when his dad is with DD. Mostly because my dad will never have that kind of relationship with her. H was really supportive and let me cry and didn't offer solutions (there are none) and let me unload this on him. It was the first time in a LOOOOONG time I felt comfortable enough to do that.
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  • edited December 2011
    I think you should also try to see a psychiatrist/psychologist and have a workup done, to see what a brain doctor thinks about your mental state. I am sure your OB is good and all, but he/she is used to dealing with the other end of your body.
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  • thatgrrrrlthatgrrrrl member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    This is true. Which is why I'm going to talk to the mental health guys. Just to make sure my chemistry isn't wonky.
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  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011

    I have a BBF that's a psychiatrist in DC - I can refer you if you're up for a trip. ;-)

    She's the one who told me about post-partem mania - the complete opposite of PPD. it sounds like it would be a fun condition if you weren't losing your marbles.

  • edited December 2011
    Mania, makes biploar with the lows!
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  • thatgrrrrlthatgrrrrl member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    PPM might be like PPA. I get all jittery when I'm anxious.
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  • hmonkeyhmonkey member
    Ninth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    less self-diagnosis, more actual medical diaagnosis
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  • edited December 2011
    Yes. I would like you to see someone one-on-one for diagnostic purposes. Group therapy is great for treatment, but not diagnosis.
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  • DG1DG1 member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011

    I am curious to know why your OB doesn't think you need meds.  *I* am not saying I know for sure that you do, but it seems like you must have left out a few details for him to come so quickly to that conclusion. 

    I have learned recently that there is post-partum onset for about a zillion (really. a zillion!) different mental health issues,  Not specific to you, since you are well aware that might be a factor, but I thought it was interesting anyway.

    Sounds like you are doing the right things, but sometimes it's just as difficult to take the second or third step as it is to take the first, especially if someone isn't pulling or pushing you along. If the therapist can't get you in for 3 weeks, for example, that is a long time in which you could lose your momentum (and your marbles). Be sure you stay on the path to getting the help you need, and ask us to kick you in the butt if you need it. :)

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  • nicoleg1982nicoleg1982 member
    5000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I call bullsht on your OB and you on going to group therapy.  You need a real mental health professional and someone you can tell EVERYTHING.

    I also call bullsht on you crying to your husband.  Wzz is right - that is what spouses do.  But when you confess to the following:

    "I'm pretty sure I have PPD. I haven't been to see anyone because H doesn't want me to, nor does he want me to go on any meds. He thinks it'll impact any chance I would have of getting life insurance (where he got this information I don't know). I would think me committing suicide would be more of an impact on life insurance. Not that I'm going to, but I had a fleeting thought during a blacker day. That scared me enough to at least put in a call to my OB. Before the doc called me back though, H and I talked and he calmed me down and made me think about how my depression is more situational (see above) than chemical.
    I'm a mess. I cry every day. The only real joy I have right now is DD. I really want to make my marriage work. I don't know how."and your H refuses to help you, that's fcking bullsht.  Short of driving our happy asses to NY, there is nothing we can to FORCE you to go get REAL help at this point.  We've comforted you, we've berated you for it, we've supported you, we've given you real options.  FTR, if I'm driving to NY, your H needs to hide.  Eff him and his lack of medical expertise.  There are people here who have been in your position and are trying to steer you in the right direction - professional mental health assistance.  Sitting around in a group full of women just as fcked up as you are is not going to help you at this point.I've been to the point where the only real joy in life was DD.  And that sucked.  So I changed.  I changed my perspective on my situation, I changed my life (not that you should do the same) and I moved on.  Bad sht is going to happen a lot in life, but if you refuse to reprogram your brain to make it handle these bad things well, you're only doing yourself and your DD more harm.I get that AWing this all over the internet is a cry for help, but you are singing these songs to the wrong audience (us, your H apparently - neither can actually DO anything for you).  You have to make a choice in life that you are going to do something for yourself to benefit YOU.  Life insurance be damned, you need help and only YOU can go get it at this point. ETA:  This discussion has been continued in the FB group as well, so maybe you should scurry your ass over there and read that advice, too.
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  • thatgrrrrlthatgrrrrl member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I saw it last night and wasn't able to respond through my phone.
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