So...I love my FI dearly. He is a wonderful man and I am a lucky woman to have him.
With that said, I might kill him before this wedding rolls around. He doesn't seem to understand (no matter how clearly I put it) that we have to SAVE for this wedding. It is not going to pay for itself!!!
I have a very detailed and specific wedding budget. That wedding budget dictates how much money MUST go into wedding savings every month so none of this wedding has to go on a credit card. FI and I have a joint account for bills and we each have an individual account with our disposible income. When we first had the "wedding budget talk" we agreed that we would each transfer a certain dollar amount into the wedding account from our individual accounts every month. That was 6 months ago and FI has YET to hit his target number. It's not that he can't, it's that he doesn't try. He can buy a new suit, he can go to happy hour after work, he can take a trip to New York with his friends, but he CANNOT save what we MUST save in order to have enough money to pull this wedding off. AND...everytime I see him so much as buy a $3 cup of coffee, I get mad!
I have tried everything. I made each of us a cute little savings thermometer with our savings goal at the top. Every time we transfer money to the wedding account we can color the thermometer in with a red marker. I hung them on the fridge side-by-side so he would see how much more I am saving than him. FAIL!
I sat him down and went over the budget and actually SHOWED him why I'm worried about the wedding budget. FAIL!
I am putting 3-4 times more money in the account than he is and I am starting to get a tab bit resentful. I told him that and his response is "well you make more money than me." Seriously, I make $200 more than him every month and because of that I contribute more to the bills than he does. He just doesn't get it. I could scream.
FI is very blessed to come from a wealthy family. I grew up very poor. I really think that he just plans to call up his parents if we fall short. I would rather sell my kidney on the black market than do that! They have already given us a TON of money. There is no reason we can't do the rest of this ourselves. It's about discipline. And FI seems to be lacking a little.
Anyone having similar issues? I'm going to pull my hair out! I've thought about telling FI that we have to cut some of the "wedding extras" because we're not going to be able to afford it. Or...cancel the honeymoon. Or something drastic to get his attention. What do you think?
October 2012 Board: June Siggy
