is this okay to do? or is this weird?

CassandraPotter · May 2011

so one of my "BM" is a guy, he has a gf, who doesn't really like me, and I don't care for her. Either way, she is coming to the wedding that's fine and dandy. Today I hung out with him and she was on the phone with him, and she wanted to know the BM dress colors so she could get a matching outfit. okay that weird-ed me out a little, I think most of it is because she isn't in the wedding party and wants a matching outfit. or am I being really bitchy? PLEASE someone tell me what to do. is it fine to have guests have matching outfits with the WP? or am I being weird about this? lol Part of me feels like I have no control over what guests wear (because I don't) but I feel like if she asks me if she can match can I say no? would most people say no?

nda_roxybabe · May 2011

Totally fine.

MandK9 · May 2011

Well, I think it's pretty weird that she made that request, but I don't think it's a super big deal if she wears the same colors as the bridal party. Don't worry or get bent out of shape about it, it's really a negligible detail of your day, IMO.

jasmineh7777 · May 2011

I think it's pretty weird actually. I'd say "We haven't decided." I'd say it for a long time.

CassandraPotter · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_this-okay-this-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6809ab44-e905-4de4-b1e3-0030663eb707Post:6d8a4aa7-13d9-4804-a62e-62c850440031">Re: is this okay to do? or is this weird?</a>:
[QUOTE]Well, I think it's pretty weird that she made that request, but I don't think it's a super big deal if she wears the same colors as the bridal party. Don't worry or get bent out of shape about it, it's really a negligible detail of your day, IMO.
Posted by MandK9[/QUOTE]
true. I guess the reason why I think its so weird is because she doesn't really like me. lol. but thanks for putting it into perspective.

playtntsbpg30 · May 2011

I think if she keeps it simple and just matches the colors, I wouldn't care too much. I don't think she'd spend the extra money to actually get a formal dress to match.

nda_roxybabe · May 2011

I meant totally fine for her to wear the wedding color. What're the odds of her getting the color spot on?

hbatchel2 · May 2011

I think its pretty weird that she asked and plans to match the wedding party. I don't think I would ever plan my wardrobe around someone's wedding colors.

crash2729 · May 2011

Is she younger? Because it sounds like she wants to match whatever he's going to wear. Somewhat Prom-like.

She probably doesn't mean matching...just for example, his vest is brown, she may wear a brown dress. KWIM?

I would second the "I don't know" if you really don't want her too...

jasmineh7777 · May 2011

Next time you're going to hang out, I'd ask him what she's wearing so you could match. Then she could realize that she is a weirdo.

Don't do that. It will just cause problems.

nda_roxybabe · May 2011

Hmm maybe I'm the weird one then...I've liked knowing so I could coordinate OR, when T was in a wedding I liked to coordinate with him....

MandK9 · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_this-okay-this-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6809ab44-e905-4de4-b1e3-0030663eb707Post:25a6af09-9d6e-4c3d-aa0e-091724ccbfe1">Re: is this okay to do? or is this weird?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: is this okay to do? or is this weird? : true. I guess the reason why I think its so weird is because she doesn't really like me. lol. but thanks for putting it into perspective.
Posted by CassandraPotter[/QUOTE]

No, I think you're totally validated in thinking it's weird. It totally is. It's just not worth your time, KWIM? :) I'd be weirded out too, for what it's worth.

jasmineh7777 · May 2011

A brown dress if he is wearing a brown vest, now that makes sense.
But I'm picturing this chick picking out a coral tea-length dress to match the BMs. That may not be the case at all, but that is where my mind went.

CassandraPotter · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_this-okay-this-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6809ab44-e905-4de4-b1e3-0030663eb707Post:533da65d-bdfd-414f-aac9-4f91a7ef30df">Re: is this okay to do? or is this weird?</a>:
[QUOTE]I meant totally fine for her to wear the wedding color. What're the odds of her getting the color spot on?
Posted by nda_roxybabe[/QUOTE]
well the BMs dresses are all different shades of plumish/eggplant purples. and they are semi-formal/formal c0ck tail dresses. so her chances of looking like an actual BM are pretty close.

nda_roxybabe · May 2011

Yea, see Jas, I'd ask to just do a nice coordinating. I would never do same style, exact color. Maybe she has innocent intentions.

jasmineh7777 · May 2011

I wouldn't tell her a color then. I'd order the vest or whatever for you male friend.
Because apparently I'm vindictive tonight.

She doesn't expect to be in pictures right? Maybe it doesn't matter as long as she' not trying to get into your formal bridal party shots. Yeah, that's probably a more rational answer.

CassandraPotter · May 2011

well what should I say tomorrow because he is probably going to ask me again because we are getting his suit tomorrow (most likely)

CassandraPotter · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_this-okay-this-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6809ab44-e905-4de4-b1e3-0030663eb707Post:bd77bcd4-a518-4c81-95f7-cbd1612459a5">Re: is this okay to do? or is this weird?</a>:
[QUOTE]Yea, see Jas, I'd ask to just do a nice coordinating. I would never do same style, exact color. Maybe she has innocent intentions.
Posted by nda_roxybabe[/QUOTE]
she does have innocent intentions. I think this is one of her first weddings, def one of her first weddings where her bf is in the WP. but I think she thinks she will be taking pictures with us...which...she won't be...

CassandraPotter · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_this-okay-this-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6809ab44-e905-4de4-b1e3-0030663eb707Post:0f364896-5b4f-4192-973d-c956fa5620bd">Re: is this okay to do? or is this weird?</a>:
[QUOTE]I wouldn't tell her a color then. I'd order the vest or whatever for you male friend. Because apparently I'm vindictive tonight. She doesn't expect to be in pictures right? Maybe it doesn't matter as long as she' not trying to get into your formal bridal party shots. Yeah, that's probably a more rational answer.
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]
I actually think she might think shes in the formal WP shots. lol.

jasmineh7777 · May 2011

1) The bridesmaids are wearing shades of purple.

2) The bridesmaids are wearing shades of purple, but I'd prefer it if your lameass girlfriend wouldn't.

3) Lets get you measured, then I will handle all the other arrangements.

nda_roxybabe · May 2011

Yea, definitely not taking pics with. Honestly, I think with the color she will have a hard time finding something and if so, the still will probably be different enough. Plus, pretty good odds some other guest will wear purple ish color anyways. I wouldnt tell her no.

crash2729 · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_this-okay-this-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6809ab44-e905-4de4-b1e3-0030663eb707Post:a324b325-4687-4ee5-be27-baf26cbfd95c">Re: is this okay to do? or is this weird?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: is this okay to do? or is this weird? : she does have innocent intentions. I think this is one of her first weddings, def one of her first weddings where her bf is in the WP. but I think she thinks she will be taking pictures with us...which...she won't be...
Posted by CassandraPotter[/QUOTE]

<div>Maybe you should just mention it to your friend, without her around. Just to feel out the situation.</div>

jasmineh7777 · May 2011

"Hey friend. The BMs are wearing purple. Just so your GF knows our schedule for the day of, we will need YOU for pictures for X amount of time. We will have cocktails during that hour, so GF will have plenty to eat and drink! I just wanted to make sure you knew our time line so GF isn't stuck waiting for you to finish with pictures."

crash2729 · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_this-okay-this-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6809ab44-e905-4de4-b1e3-0030663eb707Post:8d52ff45-f00b-4ce0-8118-290558a53296">Re: is this okay to do? or is this weird?</a>:
[QUOTE]"Hey friend. The BMs are wearing purple. Just so your GF knows our schedule for the day of, we will need YOU for pictures for X amount of time. We will have cocktails during that hour, so GF will have plenty to eat and drink! I just wanted to make sure you knew our time line so GF isn't stuck waiting for you to finish with pictures."
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]

<div>^ Perfect.</div>

CassandraPotter · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_this-okay-this-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6809ab44-e905-4de4-b1e3-0030663eb707Post:8d52ff45-f00b-4ce0-8118-290558a53296">Re: is this okay to do? or is this weird?</a>:
[QUOTE]"Hey friend. The BMs are wearing purple. Just so your GF knows our schedule for the day of, we will need YOU for pictures for X amount of time. We will have cocktails during that hour, so GF will have plenty to eat and drink! I just wanted to make sure you knew our time line so GF isn't stuck waiting for you to finish with pictures."
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]
yeahhh. hahah I will need to inform him of this tomorrow, because I'm pretty sure he doesn't realize she will be 1) sitting by herself during the ceremony NOT in the front and 2) he will be gone for an hour after the ceremony for pics

jasmineh7777 · May 2011

I'm willing to bet my weight in gold that GF is going to be PISSED when she finds out she's not sitting with him.

CassandraPotter · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_this-okay-this-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6809ab44-e905-4de4-b1e3-0030663eb707Post:89a27ad8-2e0d-47d9-a1cb-5c189b8b6d30">Re: is this okay to do? or is this weird?</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm willing to bet my weight in gold that GF is going to be PISSED when she finds out she's not sitting with him.
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]
well during the reception she will be. but not during the ceremony he is standing....i have no idea why she would even think she would be sitting near him (which i'm sure she thinks she will be in the front because hes basically my best friend)

jasmineh7777 · May 2011

Also, is he sitting with her during the reception?

ETA: You already answered that one. Thank goodness or the girl might implode.

MandK9 · May 2011

Uh oh. That'll be fun.

CassandraPotter · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_this-okay-this-weird?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:6809ab44-e905-4de4-b1e3-0030663eb707Post:2fc35b9d-a046-4f56-a988-8685ad959c0c">Re: is this okay to do? or is this weird?</a>:
[QUOTE]Also, is he sitting with her during the reception?
Posted by jasmineh7777[/QUOTE]
yeah. we aren't having a head table. we're having a "sweet heart table" aka us not sitting or eating because we will be too busy talking to people.

jasmineh7777 · May 2011

I'm heading to bed, but I really want to hear how this all goes tomorrow. Good luck!

is this okay to do? or is this weird?

Re: is this okay to do? or is this weird?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards