MOB wants to wear black

cwaggoner07 · October 2012

My bridesmaids wore ivoryand gray dresses, and my mom wore a bright orange and blue dress. I totally didn't care, because it totally doesn't matter.

saric83 · October 2012

Wow...Where in the world does any bride ANYWHERE get off thinking they can tell grown adults how to dress, let alone the person who gave birth to them and raised them?!?

Even if the social etiquette still deems black is somewhat inappropriate (which I very very highly doubt that's the case in Chicago), who cares what other people think over your mother's comfort and preference??

It's disgusting that people think they're entitled to dictate how other people need to dress. You're not a pretty pretty princess who rules the world. You're getting married. Try focusing on building a strong marriage, not what color a mother wears a wedding.

shelle416 · October 2012

Thanks for your posts all! I will tell you that my "MOB" is my biological mother who will have not many friends of her own there, becuse she doesn't have many, our invite list is over 350, I was taught that a MOB shoud not wear black becuse it is a color of mourning, i am NOT a bridezilla as my MOH and BM's have the choice to wear what color dress they want...be it silver, purple or black.

Point is, I was asking a simple question about what you thought. I was taught, again, that a MOB does not wear black. My mother has not been to a wedding since she married my father 37 years ago.

Amazing when asking for an opinion some of you are just rude and love to name-call....

To those of you who were nice about it, even if it was an opinion against what I was believing then, THANK YOU.

The other mean people should just listen to their mothers, if you don't have something "nice" to say, say nothing at all.

shelle416 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_mob-wants-to-wear-black?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:118c1703-e0ed-4534-80b4-97d2e7d4504bPost:597e964a-2f49-4a7f-b050-39e9db5ce6b8">Re:MOB wants to wear black</a>:
[QUOTE]People who tell me that I cant wear a color just because I have breasts can suck it. And if my daughter, who I risked my life to birth, raise, and spent years nurturing put me at the back over something as trivial and lame as a color, i'd tell her to suck it too.
Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

Point made...but my mother never raised me...she's my biological mom who I want no trouble for, who doesnt' go to weddings, who won't even have a date I'm guessing....It's not a dictation, it's a "I always thought MOB was not to wear that color because it's perceived as mourning/against the wedding., and I've never been to a wedding where MOB wears black.

Now that you have more "story", opinion?

OH, and lovely language for a woman.

shine882007 · October 2012

OP, with the way it seems you treat your mother, I would be more concerned that she actually shows up then what she wears. She is your MOTHER!

You should not be dictating what ANYONE wears to your wedding.

shine882007 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_mob-wants-to-wear-black?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:118c1703-e0ed-4534-80b4-97d2e7d4504bPost:9d6bc5c2-43bc-4c62-a9c9-df404f0a6974">Re: MOB wants to wear black</a>:
[QUOTE]Thanks for your posts all! I will tell you that my "MOB" is my biological mother who will have not many friends of her own there, becuse she doesn't have many, our invite list is over 350, I was taught that a MOB shoud not wear black becuse it is a color of mourning, i am NOT a bridezilla as <strong>my MOH and BM's have the choice to wear what color dress they want...be it silver, purple or black</strong>. Point is, I was asking a simple question about what you thought. I was taught, again, that a MOB does not wear black. My mother has not been to a wedding since she married my father 37 years ago. Amazing when asking for an opinion some of you are just rude and love to name-call.... To those of you who were nice about it, even if it was an opinion against what I was believing then, THANK YOU. The other mean people should just listen to their mothers, if you don't have something "nice" to say, say nothing at all.
Posted by shelle416[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>So, your MOH and BM's can wear black, but heaven forbid your Mom does? WTF.</div>

MairePoppy · October 2012

shelle - it's not unusual for the mothers to wear black cocktail dresses to weddings. It is no longer considered a sign that the mom is mourning. In fact, it is not typical for people around here to wear all black to funerals. Times have changed. I would advise you to let your mother wear whatever she thinks is appropriate to your wedding.

By the way, I think most of the responses were directed at this remark, as well as her follow up posts:

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_mob-wants-to-wear-black?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:118c1703-e0ed-4534-80b4-97d2e7d4504bPost:6d9222d3-27c8-499c-a793-b99e51a67b88">Re: MOB wants to wear black</a>:
[QUOTE]She can wear what she wants. She can also be given a seat in the back.
Posted by NYUgirl100[/QUOTE]

vikinggirl4 · October 2012

I think a black dress is fine. However, you may want to consider that it may be a "last resort" dress for your mom. Mine, for example, is on the larger side and has a very hard time finding dresses within budget and suitable as a MOB dress. Unfortunately, she can't wear just any old colour, nor any old shape, and so has been having a hard time. Currently, the only dresses that may work are purple, like the bridesmaids, and that is okay with me. If those dresses don't work (they have been ordered, not tried on), then she will be looking at wearing a black dress. Again, that's okay, because often times there are circumstances in someone's head that are causing them to wear certain colours. It may be nothing concerned with disrespect or mourining or what have you, but rather a "I love the way I look in black, and if I'm going to be in pictures I think black will be nice". Give your mom the benefit of the doubt, have a talk with her, be honest and kind, because this is the time when feelings can get hurt. Good luck!

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