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Wedding Shower for a Destination Wedding?

ginx1188ginx1188 member
Second Anniversary 10 Comments
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Long story short we decided to have a destination wedding in december, but we still plan to get married in the church at home (long story) and have a reception back at home so we can invite all our friends and family. My mother thinks it's poor ettiquet to have a bridal shower for a destination wedding...... I think she's wrong, but any thoughts on the topic?
Thanks
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Re: Wedding Shower for a Destination Wedding?

  • DramaGeekDramaGeek member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its
    If you're having a destination wedding, how can you get married at home too?

    The bridal shower is not in poor taste if all shower guests are also invited to the wedding.  And by wedding, I mean the one where you make a legally binding contract with your husband.
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  • Summer2011BrideSummer2011Bride member
    5000 Comments Third Anniversary 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    Ditto PP. Why are you having two weddings? I would personally just stick with the DW if that's really what you want.

    Anyone invited to that wedding then can be invited to a shower.


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  • LoopysevenLoopyseven member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 5 Love Its
    What is the point of a DW if you're still going to do a church "wedding" and reception?  I don't get it.

    Only people who are invited to the DW (which I assume is the one where you will actually be exchanging legally binding vows and paperwork) can be invited to any pre-wedding parties.
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  • AdeleDazeemAdeleDazeem member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited July 2012
    Are you getting marred in your church at home and re-enacting your wedding at a destination?  Ew.

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  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    If the DW is the event where you two will tie TK then that's the event where the shower guest list is based.

    Furthermore, it wouldn't be appropriate to invite some people to your convalidation / blessing if they aren't invited to the DW.  Pick a guest list and stick to it.
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  • RebeccaB88RebeccaB88 member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    All of your shower guests must be invited to the wedding where you actually, you know, get married. 

    Solution - have your legal wedding in your hometown in your church and invite everyone. Have your shower before this one.  Have your pretend wedding alone on your honeymoon. Hell, have one every day alone on your honeymoon if you want.  Then it's no biggie because you aren't breaking any rules. But if you get legally married at your DW, you have to either invite all your shower guests (with SOs) or not have a shower. Your choice.
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  • ThankfulSnailThankfulSnail member
    500 Comments Third Anniversary 5 Love Its
    I agree completely with PPs. You only get married to the same person once, unless there is a divorce in between the weddings. I don't understand the point of having a church and a destination wedding.

    Pick one wedding from those two, nix the other, fake wedding, and make a guest list for your wedding. Anyone invited to the wedding may be invited to the shower, but only people receiving an invitation to your wedding can be invited to the shower.
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