Budget Cape Wedding Help

Amyliam · July 2010

Trying to have a wedding for 10k next summer on the cape

Is this even possible?

Any tips on cheap wedding venues and/or reception sites please?

BunsCheer03 · July 2010

It all matters what your looking for, its possible, its just how much you want to get for your $$. Im trying to do my wedding on a budget and Im using the Harbor Point. I also looked at the Beachmoor & hemipheres. One of my big things was that I wanted to view the ocean, if thats not a huge point for you there are other options like Bourne Farm, Holiday Inn Falmouth, Pocasset Golf Course, and im sure there are more that Im not familiar with. If your trying to save money the biggest price cut if to lose the ocean view(in my opinion) Hope this Helps

MeaghanandMichael · July 2010

The biggest way to save money? Cut the guest list.
I would also recommend DIY centerpieces, skipping favors and perhaps having just a hors d'oeuvres reception without dancing mid afternoon or late evening.

You can not cut out the meal if it is during meal time as people will be hungry. You also need to provide open bar, or at least beer, wine and softd rinks. You could have a dry reception though to save money.

[Deleted User] · July 2010

Definitely look into Skippy's Pier 1 and the Surf & Sand Motel in Yarmouth - meal prices are $30-$40/pp, there's no site fee as long as you have their minimum number of guests (125 for afternoon, 150 for evening). I have some pictures from my wedding in a previous post. They only do weddings in the shoulder months (May, June, September, October) so if you are looking for high summer season it won't work.

I'm one who does not always agree that open bar is a necessity. Your guests understand that it is a difficult economy and I don't think it is as expected as it used to be. If you do want to go that route, their drinks are very reasonable so you can get more for your money - and their open bar options are per consumption not per person which can be cheaper, and if you want to give a certain amount of money for towards the bar you can do that and have them let ou know when you are close to your max. Then you can evaluate the time and your guests and determine if you want to give more money. We had about 160 people and our reception costs (with $1500 for the cocktail hour drinks, and a huge antipasto appetizer display) was under $10k. Our grand total with all other wedding expenses (other vendors, attire, decorations, ceremony rentals, etc) was under $20k - our original plan was to try to do everything for under $10 but with our large families we quickly realized trying to keep things under $20 was more reasonable.

Let me know if you want more info on the venue - they were really fantastic!

MeaghanandMichael · July 2010

FYI - many people do not agree an open bar is necessary (guest AND hosts!), but etiquette dictates it is not ok for your guests to open their wallets at your wedding for any reason. You should strive to be be a gracious hostess, even if as a guest you would not be offended by a host who did not provide. These are two different concepts and with planning a social function comes responsibility. Some people feel it is a matter of opinion, but it really is not in terms of etiquette. Of course, you may do as you chose, but the long standing tradition of hostessing events speaks for itself and will speak for you in the long run. Would you charge for dinner? No. There is no logical reason why alcohol is any different.

You need to plan the wedding you can afford while keeping in mind the needs of your guests and the need to be a gracious hostess when planning the most formal even of your life.

BunsCheer03 · July 2010

Im not offering an open bar, we may do a signature drink for cocktail hour to provide for our guests, but thats it. I know that the guests at our wedding will not expect an open bar so i dont have a problem breaking the proper ediquite.... we mostly do BYOB parties so whats the difference right?

tropicanha · July 2010

I think (at least they did so in the past, I don't know if they do now) that the Coonamessett Inn and Flying Bridge in Falmouth don't charge a reception/venue fee if you do an afternoon wedding (otherwise it's $4000 in the evening - crazy expensive!)

rachelewalsh · July 2010

You May want to try a smaller restaurant setting! I know that the Landfall in woods Hole is right on the water and they do smaller weddings. There are a ton of nice restaurants that I am sure could accommodate a wedding! I just really depends on what you want!

MeaghanandMichael · July 2010

A wedding does not equal the same level as a byob BBQ in terms of hostessing.
Again, I get that many people are more then comfortable ignoring this etiquette (with a t, not d) rule, but at least stop trying to compare apples and oranges.

Also, blaming the decision on what your guests expect is unfair to them. Unless you personally know every single guest is used to having a cash bar wedding, some may show up with little or no cash. I would be very careful to spread by word of mouth before the wedding that people will need cash for your wedding reception so no one is left unprepared. You know, becaus after they travel, book a hotel, buy a dress and buy you a present - they still need to cough up $$ for their own drinks.

AC18 · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_massachusetts-cape-cod_budget-cape-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:94Discussion:bb5c7579-8bef-4482-b49b-4f43eff79636Post:2bed65b5-16ab-4360-9a88-490e7963170b">Re: Budget Cape Wedding Help</a>:
[QUOTE]I think (at least they did so in the past, I don't know if they do now) that the Coonamessett Inn and Flying Bridge in Falmouth don't charge a reception/venue fee if you do an afternoon wedding (otherwise it's $4000 in the evening - crazy expensive!)
Posted by tropicanha[/QUOTE]

I am getting married at the flying bridge next summer. Im not sure about afternoon weddings, they only offered nights to us. So look into it though, the fees at the Flying bridge are not the same as coonamessett they are much less!! Good Luck!

bnew58 · July 2010

I'm on a strict budget and am getting married at the Coonamessett. I think they are pretty reasonable! i'm saving money by keeping my guest list at 80 - it's been a little difficult to accomplish but totally doable!!!

allisong23 · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_massachusetts-cape-cod_budget-cape-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:94Discussion:bb5c7579-8bef-4482-b49b-4f43eff79636Post:96fd7a44-6e58-4fcc-9b35-5a2fa6511ef0">Re: Budget Cape Wedding Help</a>:
[QUOTE]A wedding does not equal the same level as a byob BBQ in terms of hostessing. Again, I get that many people are more then comfortable ignoring this etiquette (with a t, not d) rule, but at least stop trying to compare apples and oranges. Also, blaming the decision on what your guests expect is unfair to them. Unless you personally know every single guest is used to having a cash bar wedding, some may show up with little or no cash. I would be very careful to spread by word of mouth before the wedding that people will need cash for your wedding reception so no one is left unprepared. You know, becaus after they travel, book a hotel, buy a dress and buy you a present - they still need to cough up $$ for their own drinks.
Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

Meaghan is 100% right here. If I invite friends over for game night, BYOB is completely acceptable (although we usually provide drinks anyway). If you had a sit down dinner party, would you expect everyone to provide their own wine or food? While you may feel completely comfortable breaking this rule, there <u>will</u> be people giving you the side eye. If I traveled from Off-Cape to your wedding, bought a dress, paid for a hotel and a gift, and you couldn't even provide beer or wine, I would be pissed. It is called being a good hostess.

amylee545 · July 2010

I'm not sure about keeping it under 10K, but keeping it under 15k is definitely doable. My fiance and I have been calculating every possible venue we've looked at and we can do all of them for under $15,000 with about 120 guests. But as PP's have said, it all depends on what you want. I, like PP, am very picky and want a oceanfront venue. So we've looked at The Aqua Grille, the Beachmoor, Harbour point, the Flying bridge, and the falmouth yacht club, which all are very budget friendly and oceanfront.

On the open bar issue, I must agree with alisong and meagan. Asking your guests to buy their drinks after them having to pay for a dress/suit, plane ticket, hotel, a gift, and whatever else seems kinda rude to me. Even if you offer SOMETHING, like a signature drink, or beer and wine, or you can also do open bar with a cap (tell them to stop open bar and switch to cash bar after they've reached $1200, or whatever your budget allows for). Having an afternoon wedding could also save you some, as people might not drink as much during the day. And the fees might be lower for afternoon weddings.

Goodluck! HTH!

JSteff22 · July 2010

I agree with Meaghan and that the easiest way to cut your budget is cut your guest list! We are absolutely thrilled that we kept our list down and in the long run our budget down. My budget is not as strict as yours, but it really helped so I didn't feel like I needed to skimp on things I cared about....food, flowers, and lastly open bar.

I also agree with Meaghan about the open bar issue. I think something should be provided-sig drink, beer or wine. I was MOH in my bestfriend's wedding and there was not an open bar, the wedding party even had to pay for drinks. It was kind of ridiculous when I had already shelled out over $1000 to fly there, and all the other stuff. It's just something to think about.

Also, something else you could think about would be to do something on the other side of the bridge, Plymouth or wherever. It's not the Cape, but it's still beautiful New England beaches. Also, look into doing an off-day wedding Friday or Sunday. It will save you $.

lewisc2002 · July 2010

yes, cash bar is pretty tacky. our place had it already streamlined, but i think i would have done it this way if we were budgeting alcohol separately: open bar for cocktail hour, wine at dinner, champagne toast - this worked well for our afternoon wedding.

when i first read BYOB, i thought people were talking about the hosts bringing the alcohol for their guests' consumption - some places let you do this for uncorking/bartending fees, and may be a cheaper alternative. i also like the idea of a cap on the open bar, which i think is reasonable - i have hosted dinner functions where i put the cap at $600 and asked the bartender to touch base with me when we got near that so i could judge how far along we were into the evening and how much to extend it.

sueflo · July 2010

Check out the Falmouth Yacht club!!!! beach ceremony spot on site and awesome venue...

Knittibell · July 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_massachusetts-cape-cod_budget-cape-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:94Discussion:bb5c7579-8bef-4482-b49b-4f43eff79636Post:bef1090f-1e0a-44b1-8d90-bf47c1d5c4d2">Re: Budget Cape Wedding Help</a>:
[QUOTE]Im not offering an open bar, we may do a signature drink for cocktail hour to provide for our guests, but thats it. I know that the guests at our wedding will not expect an open bar so i dont have a problem breaking the proper ediquite.... we mostly do BYOB parties so whats the difference right?
Posted by BunsCheer03[/QUOTE]

Do people generally bring an expensive gift, and buy new clothes to attend your BYOB party? That's the difference! Beer/wine and a sig drink is fine, though- you don't have to have a full, open top shelf bar!

[Deleted User] · July 2010

If you are looking for a photogrpaher, let me know I'm willing to work with your budget

http://www.pictage.com/photographers/listing.do?n=hfrymark-design-studio&studio=HF022

Amyliam · August 2010

Thanks for all the info everyone.

We decided to go with Harbor Point in Cummaquid. It's got a great view of the water and was so affordable that we can have an open bar...with a $ limit of course.

Any ideas on how to have the ceremony at a beach near by?

hsarnataro · July 2012

Has anyone had any expereinces with The Hemisphere? It seems to be the best bet as far as having everything we would want but still being within our budget however it seems like they are not as helpful as other places. It just seems like it would be lot of work for us when other venues would take care of everything for us. I want advice from someone who has either been married there or has dealt with this resturaunt at all. Please help!

lindseyobrien23 · October 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_massachusetts-cape-cod_budget-cape-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:94Discussion:bb5c7579-8bef-4482-b49b-4f43eff79636Post:8d89d6e3-6b27-46ce-99ba-75950612c306">Re: Budget Cape Wedding Help</a>:
[QUOTE]Has anyone had any expereinces with The Hemisphere? It seems to be the best bet as far as having everything we would want but still being within our budget however it seems like they are not as helpful as other places. It just seems like it would be lot of work for us when other venues would take care of everything for us. I want advice from someone who has either been married there or has dealt with this resturaunt at all. Please help!
Posted by hsarnataro[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I haven't dealt with Hemispheres in regard to a wedding but ever since it changed owners, it's gone DOWN HILL. The restaurant tries to be fancy but the food is NOT good. I'd definitely make sure you eat at least one meal there before you continue with the wedding process.

</div>

MalonT23 · December 2012

I am newly enganged and would love to have some advise from you ladies on where to have our wedding. I am actually orginally from Cape Cod, getting married on the beach is not a priority nor is it necessary for me to have ocean views from the reception site. I am a local girl who wants to get married in my hometown but the unfortunate thing is, I am from the cape. Our budget is $15,000, and we are very flexiable about what time of the year to get married. We are going to look at Bournedale as they offer off season rates, around $63 per person. Our guest list is around 150 but my expectations is that we can get it to 125. While we like the price at Bournedale, if you add in DJ, Flowers, and Photographer our budget would expand to about $20,000 which we really do not want to do. Any suggestions?

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