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When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???

egammo3egammo3
500 Comments
in July 2012 Weddings
I am getting married July 14, 2012, and I picked my bridesmaids almost 5 months ago. I am planning a meeting for my bridal party on July 3rd as this will be the only day ALL of my bridesmaids will be together (I have some out of town). During the meeting, I am going to discuss the details of the wedding and most importantly, the bridesmaids expenses. Some have told me that the earlier the better so that they can budget, but I am still feeling like maybe this may be too early to discuss with them. What do you think?
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Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???

  • ceglare4ceglare4
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    It sort of depends on how "firm" the amount of money that they will have to spend is at this point. Do you know how much the BM dresses will cost? Do you know for sure all of the things that they will have to pay for? For instance, are you requiring them to wear the same shoes, have their hair done, etc. I would make sure that you have a very good idea of how much it will be before you let them know, so that something doesn't come up later that they need to pay for and didn't budget for. And if all else fails, budget a little higher than you might think. It's always better to come up on the low, rather than the high end of the budget number :] Also, make sure you take into account how much each of your BM can afford to spend.
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  • egammo3egammo3
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:0d47c8e8-e68e-4257-ada3-463c5f336310">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]It sort of depends on how "firm" the amount of money that they will have to spend is at this point. Do you know how much the BM dresses will cost? Do you know for sure all of the things that they will have to pay for? For instance, are you requiring them to wear the same shoes, have their hair done, etc. I would make sure that you have a very good idea of how much it will be before you let them know, so that something doesn't come up later that they need to pay for and didn't budget for. And if all else fails, budget a little higher than you might think. It's always better to come up on the low, rather than the high end of the budget number :] Also, make sure you take into account how much each of your BM can afford to spend.
    Posted by ceglare4[/QUOTE]

    Yes, I pretty much have the prices of everything, I've been working on it for the past few months. Part of the reason for having the meeting is bc one of my bridesmaids is in another wedding, and they were originally given a budget, but the bride keeps adding in things that weren't originally discussed in their meeting causing them to cough up more money. I want to let my brides know everything upfront so that they can start budgeting now so they can tell me whether its affordable or not.
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  • ceglare4ceglare4
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    Sounds like you're going about this the right way then! I would definitely have your meeting with them since you've got a lot of things figured out and organized. It'll be nice to have everyone all together to be able to talk about everything. Sounds like fun!
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  • egammo3egammo3
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:bd8e369a-8f10-4af2-a58b-0283a49404ac">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]Sounds like you're going about this the right way then! I would definitely have your meeting with them since you've got a lot of things figured out and organized. It'll be nice to have everyone all together to be able to talk about everything. Sounds like fun!
    Posted by ceglare4[/QUOTE]

    Thanks! I am going to try to make it fun. I am even going to have wine and little finger foods as refreshments. So, it should be interesting!
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  • LADY324LADY324
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    If you read some of the posts on the wedding party board you will read that you really should ask them what they can afford and you budget around that.  It should not be you saying the dress costs $200 or $300 bucks and the shoes are $70 and you have a year to save so make sure you budget for $370.  What other expenses will they have? 

    I am just a little nervous about the way you are presenting this to them.  Take into consideration all of their financial situations.  Not everyone can afford what you may have in mind for the "budget". 
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  • littlemoments324littlemoments324 member
    2500 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:ec116d90-eaeb-4141-b7e0-ff154e91432d">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]If you read some of the posts on the wedding party board you will read that you really should ask them what they can afford and you budget around that.  It should not be you saying the dress costs $200 or $300 bucks and the shoes are $70 and you have a year to save so make sure you budget for $370.  What other expenses will they have?  I am just a little nervous about the way you are presenting this to them.  Take into consideration all of their financial situations.  Not everyone can afford what you may have in mind for the "budget". 
    Posted by LADY324[/QUOTE]


    All of this exactly!  I've asked my BM's what they are willing to spend.  So, I've picked dresses that are under te $175 (which was the max any of them are willing to spend).  I told them they can wear whatever silver shoes and jewelry they wanted to wear.  I told them that I am going to be having a hairdresser at the hotel room and she is costing $40.  So whoever wanted to use her could or they could use someone else.  Make-up is up to them since a lot of them can do it themselves or one of my BM's is pretty good at doing it.  They have the option to get their nails done if they want to.  Not a requirement.  If I required them to have their nails, hair make-up done then I (the bride) would have to pay for it. 
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  • LADY324LADY324
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:6b078fb3-08b8-44aa-9d30-3efbd409ae7d">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding??? : All of this exactly!  I've asked my BM's what they are willing to spend.  So, I've picked dresses that are under te $175 (which was the max any of them are willing to spend).  I told them they can wear whatever silver shoes and jewelry they wanted to wear.  I told them that I am going to be having a hairdresser at the hotel room and she is costing $40.  So whoever wanted to use her could or they could use someone else.  Make-up is up to them since a lot of them can do it themselves or one of my BM's is pretty good at doing it.  They have the option to get their nails done if they want to.  Not a requirement.  If I required them to have their nails, hair make-up done then I (the bride) would have to pay for it. 
    Posted by littlemoments324[/QUOTE]

    Ditto!! 
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  • egammo3egammo3
    500 Comments
    edited May 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:ec116d90-eaeb-4141-b7e0-ff154e91432d">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]If you read some of the posts on the wedding party board you will read that you really should ask them what they can afford and you budget around that.  It should not be you saying the dress costs $200 or $300 bucks and the shoes are $70 and you have a year to save so make sure you budget for $370.  What other expenses will they have?  I am just a little nervous about the way you are presenting this to them.  Take into consideration all of their financial situations.  Not everyone can afford what you may have in mind for the "budget". 
    Posted by LADY324[/QUOTE]

    Everyone that I spoke with in my bridal party informed me that there was no problem with whatever cost as long as I told them in advance so that they could budget and save. Trust me, I would not choose a budget that I personally would not be able to afford if I were in they're position. When you agree to be in someone's wedding,  nowadays, you agree to the financial responsibility as well. As I said in my PP, the reason why I am having the meeting is see what they feel they are able to afford. And if anything I've picked out thus far is not within reach, then I am more than happy to go back to the drawing board afterall, it is MY wedding. In no way am I saying they have to commit to what I have picked out. In no way was this post about the budget but whether it was appropriate to have a meeting 1 year from the day of my wedding.
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  • ceglare4ceglare4
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:66238abd-a9cd-4ae0-9de8-a64642448489">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding??? : Everyone that I spoke with in my bridal party informed me that there was no problem with whatever cost as long as I told them in advance so that they could budget and save. Trust me, I would not choose a budget that I personally would not be able to afford if I were in they're position. When you agree to be in someone's wedding,  nowadays, you agree to the financial responsibility as well. As I said in my PP, the reason why I am having the meeting is see what they feel they are able to afford. And if anything I've picked out thus far is not within reach, then I am more than happy to go back to the drawing board afterall, it is MY wedding. In no way am I saying they have to commit to what I have picked out. In no way was this post about the budget but whether it was appropriate to have a meeting 1 year from the day of my wedding.
    Posted by egammo3[/QUOTE]

    That's what I got out of your OP too. I agree with the PP's on asking them about their budget and it being proper etiquette for the bride to pay for anything that she requires with the exception of the dress. But I didn't get the vibe from you that that's what you were concerned about. Again, it sounds like you're looking at this from a logical perspective, which is good!
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  • LADY324LADY324
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker

    You should really post this on the wedding party board.  Also you might want to ask each girl individually what they are able to afford and not in a meeting.  If someone can only afford $100 and everyone else says they can afford $250 the other girl may feel too intimidated to speak up. 

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  • avsfan33avsfan33 member
    1000 Comments
    Just because you can afford something doesn't mean Bridesmaid B can afford the same thing. Hopefully you asked each girl seperately what they can afford instead of creating an awkward situation where they're forced to agree to a price just because the other girls said yes. Also, what exactly are you making them pay for? Anything beyond the dress isn't necessarily their responsibility to pay for.
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  • egammo3egammo3
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:dd400122-75ca-4338-8ab7-5ed4047f2b4d">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]Just because you can afford something doesn't mean Bridesmaid B can afford the same thing. Hopefully you asked each girl seperately what they can afford instead of creating an awkward situation where they're forced to agree to a price just because the other girls said yes. Also, what exactly are you making them pay for? Anything beyond the dress isn't necessarily their responsibility to pay for.
    Posted by avsfan33[/QUOTE]

    They are responsible for paying for the dress and bouquet. I have picked out shoes, but because the dress is so long, I am giving them the option to decide what shoe they want because not everyone will be comfortable with the same shoe. I am purchasing their jewelry (not to be included in their bridesmaid gifts). I have booked a makeup artist but that is optional as well. I wanted to discuss whether they were comfortable with the dress and price that I picked out and to see if they would be interested in any of the things I picked out as well such as the (shoes, hairstyles, and makeup). The main reason for the meeting yet again was so that everyone could meet each other, and to share the details of the wedding such as the official date, times, venues, and to share with them some of the things that I picked out for them.
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  • egammo3egammo3
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:14604074-cccb-4c9d-b664-8094a2c12d67">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]You should really post this on the wedding party board.  Also you might want to ask each girl individually what they are able to afford and not in a meeting.  If someone can only afford $100 and everyone else says they can afford $250 the other girl may feel too intimidated to speak up. 
    Posted by LADY324[/QUOTE]

    Lady 324, you are absolutely correct, and I apologize for being defensive earlier. But, this is the reason why I am having the meeting. Most of my girls are very opinionated and will tell me exactly what they are uncomfortable with. I did manage to take each bridesmaid with me when picking out things, so they are fully aware of the prices. Now, I have added everything together and would like to give them the overall price of things so that they can let me know whether they are still comfortable with the prices or not... I would hope that as adults they would come to me whether during the meeting or in private to let me know if there are problems.  
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  • littlemoments324littlemoments324 member
    2500 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:751c1432-2299-4865-a1a7-c0f93be85733">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding??? : <strong>They are responsible for paying for the</strong> dress and <strong>bouquet</strong>. I have picked out shoes, but because the dress is so long, I am giving them the option to decide what shoe they want because not everyone will be comfortable with the same shoe. I am purchasing their jewelry (not to be included in their bridesmaid gifts). I have booked a makeup artist but that is optional as well. I wanted to discuss whether they were comfortable with the dress and price that I picked out and to see if they would be interested in any of the things I picked out as well such as the (shoes, hairstyles, and makeup). The main reason for the meeting yet again was so that everyone could meet each other, and to share the details of the wedding such as the official date, times, venues, and to share with them some of the things that I picked out for them.
    Posted by egammo3[/QUOTE]

    You are seriously expecting your BM's to pay for their bouquet???  OMG!  That is ridiculous!  You as the bride is supposed to pay for the flowers...not the BM's....wow...

    I am in agreement with pp on you should ask the girls privately about what they can afford and what they can't...I would be uncomfortable telling my financial business in front of other people...
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  • LADY324LADY324
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:751c1432-2299-4865-a1a7-c0f93be85733">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding??? : <strong>They are responsible for paying for the dress and bouquet.</strong> I have picked out shoes, but because the dress is so long, I am giving them the option to decide what shoe they want because not everyone will be comfortable with the same shoe. I am purchasing their jewelry (not to be included in their bridesmaid gifts). I have booked a makeup artist but that is optional as well. I wanted to discuss whether they were comfortable with the dress and price that I picked out and to see if they would be interested in any of the things I picked out as well such as the (shoes, hairstyles, and makeup). The main reason for the meeting yet again was so that everyone could meet each other, and to share the details of the wedding such as the official date, times, venues, and to share with them some of the things that I picked out for them.
    Posted by egammo3[/QUOTE]

    Why are you making them pay for their bouquet?  If you are requiring them to hold a bouquet then you should be paying for it.  Not trying to come across as mean but this is not proper etiquette.  How much is their bouquet going to cost?  Please check out the etiquette board and wedding party board I think it will be really helpful before you hold this big meeting. 
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  • Nati05Nati05 member
    1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    edited May 2011
    In past weddings, I've had to pay for my dress and shoes. Never flowers though, that one is new. Is there a reason they're paying for it? Do they know and have agreed to this? Just curious...

    **ETA: Since you mentioned no one was answering your original question, I'll go for it. Generally it's recommended you wait 8-6 months before the date to choose your WP, but I know this tends to vary among some brides. But since you already have them, and it's the only time everyone will be able to meet, I think it will be fine. Since they've already been asked, better to know all the expenses earlier than later! GL
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  • egammo3egammo3
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:162cb780-5acb-4eda-8189-e575b50bb3ea">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding??? : Why are you making them pay for their bouquet?  If you are requiring them to hold a bouquet then you should be paying for it.  Not trying to come across as mean but this is not proper etiquette.  How much is their bouquet going to cost?  Please check out the etiquette board and wedding party board I think it will be really helpful before you hold this big meeting. 
    Posted by LADY324[/QUOTE]

    Where I'm from, it is the responsibility of the bridesmaid to pay for their dress and bouquet. I have done it for several weddings that I have been in as well. As far as ettiquette goes, I believe that anything additional to that is optional. However, this is something I have been going back and forth on because I actually agree that I should be responsible for their bouquets, so the bouquet issue is def a topic of discussion between both myself and my family.
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  • egammo3egammo3
    500 Comments
    OMG! You ladies are taking this completely OVERBOARD! You all get so serious about the smallest things. You follow everything on these boards like it is the "bible." I'm sorry, but I don't do things by the book, and never have. Everyone does things differently. I came to this board to get ideas, not to be criticized nor judged for my decisions. You all have to remember, this is MY wedding, and each and every person that I have in my wedding (including my entire BP, FMIL & FSIL who is a college student and with no job so my FMIL will be paying for everything,) has agreed that it is my day, and whatever I want she will do what it takes.  I do agree with some of the things you have said, and I have gone to the ettiquette board many times, but it does not necessarily mean that I have to follow it. If my BM's have all agreed to the expenses, then thats all that should matter.
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  • avsfan33avsfan33 member
    1000 Comments
    edited May 2011
    Actually it's your FI's and your wedding not just yours. If you don't want opinions, don't go to an international message board with thousands of users.

    Maybe you should lurk some more before you post because if you think the ladies on here are overboard do not venture off to any other board and get off the internet.

    ETA: Spelling fail.
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  • LADY324LADY324
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:9a2593cc-4bf1-4293-9116-dfc51caa1991">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]OMG! You ladies are taking this completely OVERBOARD! You all get so serious about the smallest things. You follow everything on these boards like it is the "bible." I'm sorry, but I don't do things by the book, and never have. Everyone does things differently. I came to this board to get ideas, not to be criticized nor judged for my decisions. You all have to remember, <strong>this is MY wedding</strong>, and each and every person that I have in my wedding (including my entire BP, FMIL & FSIL who is a college student and with no job so my FMIL will be paying for everything,) has agreed <strong>that it is my day</strong>, <strong>and whatever I want she will do what it takes</strong>.  I do agree with some of the things you have said, and I have gone to the ettiquette board many times, but it does not necessarily mean that I have to follow it. If my BM's have all agreed to the expenses, then thats all that should matter.
    Posted by egammo3[/QUOTE]

    Ok I am done being nice stop acting like you are 12 years old stomping your feet yelling this is my day and my wedding.  And it is not just your day did you forget about your Fiance??? 

    Good luck with your meeting I hope it goes smoothly!!
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  • LADY324LADY324
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:0b3b2729-48f6-4017-8f9e-f5c0a1cec469">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]Actually it's your FI's and your wedding not just yours. If you don't want opinions, don't go to an international message board with thousands of users. Maybe you should lurk some more before you post because if you think the ladies on here are overboard do not venture off to any other board and get off the internet. ETA: Spelling fail.
    Posted by avsfan33[/QUOTE]

    I wish the knot had a like button just like facebook. 
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  • egammo3egammo3
    500 Comments
    edited May 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:20ddc149-3038-4953-ab3d-d9a2cbf9cbb1">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]In past weddings, I've had to pay for my dress and shoes. Never flowers though, that one is new. Is there a reason they're paying for it? Do they know and have agreed to this? Just curious... **ETA : Since you mentioned no one was answering your original question, I'll go for it. Generally it's recommended you wait 8-6 months before the date to choose your WP, but I know this tends to vary among some brides. But since you already have them, and it's the only time everyone will be able to meet, I think it will be fine. Since they've already been asked, better to know all the expenses earlier than later! GL
    Posted by Nati05[/QUOTE]

    Thank you for answering the post! I don't know where the expense conversation came in to play especially when I did not pose the question about it in the OP. And as far as it being MY day, Yes! it is my MY day. My day to marry the love of My life, My 1 day to be happy and feel like a princess. So if you have a problem with the word "My" then go kick rocks Lady 324 and avsfan (whoever you are)
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  • avsfan33avsfan33 member
    1000 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:c6059cee-e226-479e-9346-cca05f9fd6b7">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding??? : I wish the knot had a like button just like facebook. 
    Posted by LADY324[/QUOTE]

    Me too. I've been nodding along with your posts the entire time.
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  • egammo3egammo3
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:a436d08a-d702-47f9-bf01-de4378364c7d">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding??? : Thank you for answering the post! I don't know where the expense conversation came in to play especially when I did not pose the question about it in the OP. And as far as it being MY day, Yes! it is my MY day. My day to marry the love of My life, My 1 day to be happy and feel like a princess. So if you have a problem with the word "My" then go kick rocks Lady 324 and avsfan (whoever you are) And if I am acting like a 12 year old in my opinion, oh well its MY Prerogative! <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-laughing.gif" border="0" alt="Laughing" title="Laughing" />
    Posted by egammo3[/QUOTE]
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  • avsfan33avsfan33 member
    1000 Comments
    Good luck with that.
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  • egammo3egammo3
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:0b3b2729-48f6-4017-8f9e-f5c0a1cec469">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]Actually it's your FI's and your wedding not just yours. If you don't want opinions, don't go to an international message board with thousands of users. Maybe you should lurk some more before you post because if you think the ladies on here are overboard do not venture off to any other board and get off the internet. ETA: Spelling fail.
    Posted by avsfan33[/QUOTE]

    My last post to you, I have been on many message boards, and have faced many opinions, I just think you and LADY 324 have gone nuts! LOL. Closing argument: maybe you should read what I'm initially asking before making a comment. "When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses of the wedding? I didn't ask your opinion on what I should make my BM's pay for. Thanks for the advice but it was certainly not warranted.
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  • ceglare4ceglare4
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    Wow, I've been gone awhile reading about some snotty 18 year old military bride on the SB board, so I'm just now jumping back into this. Sadly, you are sounding a lot like her right now. I tried being nice and giving you the benefit of the doubt, but you are coming across as entitled and childish. As PP's have said, it isn't just YOUR day. It's you and your FI's wedding that you're sharing with every single person that you invite. As soon as you invite others, it ceases to be all.about.you.

    No need to add anything to the BM expenses topic. It's all been covered by PP's too.


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  • avsfan33avsfan33 member
    1000 Comments
    If you don't want advice, don't post. Yes, me and Lady are the ones who are nuts. Clearly.
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  • Nati05Nati05 member
    1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_july-2012-weddings_should-let-bridesmaids-expenses-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:066005ef-215f-48b1-8655-328b41e07c52Discussion:36b1d126-d432-46bf-ab75-61a97783929aPost:a436d08a-d702-47f9-bf01-de4378364c7d">Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding???</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: When should I let my bridesmaids know about the expenses for the wedding??? : Thank you for answering the post! I don't know where the expense conversation came in to play especially when I did not pose the question about it in the OP. And as far as it being MY day, Yes! it is my MY day. My day to marry the love of My life, My 1 day to be happy and feel like a princess. So if you have a problem with the word "My" then go kick rocks Lady 324 and avsfan (whoever you are)
    Posted by egammo3[/QUOTE]

    Well don't get all upset. They're just trying help. No it wasn't the purpose of your post but these girls were just concerned about some of the things you mentioned and even asked questions to understand better. That's how these boards work sometimes. There was nothing overboard about their posts. And you're right, there is no "wedding bible", there are certain things that are regional and cultural. So just leave it at that. It wasn't a judgement. And avs is right, we're very nice girls here compared to other boards, but throwing insults around isn't going to help anything or anyone.
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  • avsfan33avsfan33 member
    1000 Comments
    Nati, I was in the SB military snot's post too and when I read this I felt the same way (as in she sounds like her). Long weekends bring out crazies apparently.
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