KPS

danieliza1127 · August 2010

It makes me sad when someone that weighs 130 feels like a fat disgusting cow. There is something seriously wrong with our society.

andyandhillary · August 2010

I agree. We have a completely unhealthy idea of beauty on both ends of the spectrum. We either think we have to embrace being ridiculously skinny or we have to embrace being overweight or even obese. I don't get it.

M&R7111 · August 2010

Yeah, but I feel that person -

I'm not sure if she has an imagine issue, but I kinda felt that way when I gained weight.

I have a very fast metabolism and was underweight my whole life. And I did get picked on because of it all the time. I also never really fit into clothes. I was the opposite of an eating disorder - I ate ANYTHING with fat and ate so much I would get sick b/c I wanted to gain weight.

However, after college, I did put weight on - all around my belly. I went from having a flat stomach with no effort to a "muffin top".

While I KNOW I'm still at a normal weight and MANY women wish they had a figure like him (I'm not being bitchy here, honest) I still couldn't help but panic. It's a strange thing. I started exercising like crazy and really watching what I ate (even though I ate well to begin with). But I had to convince myself to get over it, it was all in my head, and I'm fine.

georgia_bride09 · August 2010

Thank you!! I thought the exact same thing when I read that. I'm 5'6", and when I was 132, I looked skeletal. The level of body dysmorphia/ low self-esteem related to body image in this country is an epidemic, IMO. NOBODY is happy with their bodies. WTF? I wish something could be done about this. We've got to bring back the curves.

KatyRoseM · August 2010

FWIW eating so much you get sick so that you can gain weight is a type of eating disorder. Being so unhappy about being thin is a problem.

Yes no one is happy with who they are, I don't think its about body image at all. No matter what we look like we want something else, if we made the ideal curvy, people would still be unhappy about what they looked like.

danieliza1127 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d4cc5201-ee41-4e12-885f-4b183ac9e379Post:fcd08b0f-3590-466f-b12a-d23e4f40c2d5">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]Thank you!! I thought the exact same thing when I read that. I'm 5'6", and when I was 132, I looked skeletal. The level of body dysmorphia/ low self-esteem related to body image in this country is an epidemic, IMO. NOBODY is happy with their bodies. WTF? I wish something could be done about this. We've got to bring back the curves.
Posted by georgia_bride09[/QUOTE]

I know! And believe me, I totally understand that anyone that gained 30lbs would feel like they're fat even if that 30lbs just took them from 100lbs to 130lb, but if you are only 130lbs YOU ARE NOT FAT! It's a mental thing.

cengle · August 2010

Wow, I had not seen that one yet. That is really sad. I would LOVE to be 130.
Our society pretty much sucks. I hate that so many beautiful women feel like they're too fat, or not pretty enough, etc. etc. Beauty takes many forms.

Brie2010 · August 2010

This is why I love Operation Beautiful: http://www.operationbeautiful.com

I post notes all the time but even I struggle with body image a lot. It's tough.

danieliza1127 · August 2010

I struggle too Brie. We all do. And that's what wrong with our society, that perfectly healthy and women still struggle with their body image because they feel they aren't skinny enough.

M&R7111 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d4cc5201-ee41-4e12-885f-4b183ac9e379Post:e05e6ad6-1ea6-4aaf-9d7c-0a778a29e509">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: KPS : I know! And believe me, I totally understand that anyone that gained 30lbs would feel like they're fat even if that 30lbs just took them from 100lbs to 130lb, but if you are only 130lbs YOU ARE NOT FAT! It's a mental thing.
Posted by danieliza1127[/QUOTE]

Well, yes, this is why I freaked. Really, I went up 4 pant sizes within a year!

So it took a little bit of reasoning that I was not fat, I gained some weight (only 25 lbs for me) but it happened within such a short time that it was shocking. Maybe the poster still hasn't gotten over that yet?

M&R7111 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d4cc5201-ee41-4e12-885f-4b183ac9e379Post:c834e48e-6e53-4430-9f7c-b7bd182f0fa7">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]FWIW eating so much you get sick so that you can gain weight is a type of eating disorder. <strong>Being so unhappy about being thin is a problem.</strong> Yes no one is happy with who they are, I don't think its about body image at all. No matter what we look like we want something else, if we made the ideal curvy, people would still be unhappy about what they looked like.
Posted by KatyRoseM[/QUOTE]

Well, I was in elementary school and middle school at the time. I was picked on all the time for being so skinny and it gave me a complex.I couldn't fit into clothes - I had to wear kid sizes in HS.

I'm OK with it now, especially since I've gained enough to be in a normal range.

danieliza1127 · August 2010

I think so many of us are never taught that each body is different and has a different shape and size and "normal". So M&R, maybe it was normal for you to be that tiny. I've known plenty of tiny women. It sucks that you weren't taught that and that all of the kids around you weren't taught that, see what I'm saying? Our society puts in this idea of what a normal or sexy woman should look like and doesn't account for the fact that every body is different. A body finds it's comfortable weight and if you eat healthy and exercise and just live a normal life, you'll stay in that range. My range isn't the same as yours and that should be okay. It's too bad that it's not that way.

Brie2010 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d4cc5201-ee41-4e12-885f-4b183ac9e379Post:97882a3a-a981-4c26-93da-0d57005641d0">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]I struggle too Brie. We all do. And that's what wrong with our society, that perfectly healthy and women still struggle with their body image because they feel they aren't skinny enough.
Posted by danieliza1127[/QUOTE]

Exactly. DH thinks I'm nuts sometimes when I get down on myself about my body, because hello, I'm running a marathon and can do these awesome distance runs and still feel fat because the scale says I'm 10 pounds heavier than I should be to have a healthy BMI. It really sucks.

I wonder if men feel this way too and are just better at hiding it. I know DH definitely has down-on-himself moments about his body, too, and he is at a healthy weight and in reasonably good shape.

wadingmoose · August 2010

That KPS makes me sad. It truly is sad that women are never happy with how they look, no matter what they look like.

It's sad that instead of women snapping out of it, it would appear that men are beginning to suffer the same fate.

I also got a giggle at the WoW KPS. Hello judgy party of one. I play WITH my husband and thanks to the game have made a number of new friends while still spending time with the old ones. Balance is good for you.

Audrey&Austin · August 2010

I completely understand the way the poster feels. I'm 5'9" and I used to be 95. I know I looked gross and it was totally unhelathy, but I do sometimes wish I was 95 instead of 125. Its an issue that I've been working on and its taken years to get to the point where I am now, but its an ongoing battle.

Whoever the original poster is, you aren't alone.

ohwhynot · August 2010

Ditto y'all.

On another PS (bump? nest?) there's a couple about grandparents' rights. Someone posted "Grandparents have rights. It's the law." or something similar. This drives me nuts: SOME states have laws that give grandparents rights, some do not. Some states require grandparents to only show that visitation or such would be in the child's best interests; some require a quasi-parental relationship in order to establish visitation rights over a parent's objections. Some statutes have been struck down, some have not.

I hate it when people just pull stuff out of their butts and post it as if it's fact.

danieliza1127 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d4cc5201-ee41-4e12-885f-4b183ac9e379Post:bb065e39-86c9-414a-8477-ef679309d32b">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]I completely understand the way the poster feels. I'm 5'9" and I used to be 95. I know I looked gross and it was totally unhelathy, but I do sometimes wish I was 95 instead of 125. Its an issue that I've been working on and its taken years to get to the point where I am now, but its an ongoing battle. Whoever the original poster is, you aren't alone.
Posted by Audrey&Austin[/QUOTE]

See that makes me sad too. It makes me sad that you sometimes wish to be 95lbs even though you KNOW it was "gross" and "totally unhealthy". It makes me sad that you would want to do that to yourself. Same as the KPS poster. I want to give you guys hugs.

nhelene · August 2010

For me it's my body shape. I know I'm thin, but I can't get over this stupid 'pookey belly'.

I'm never going to look like a Sports Illustrated Model. It shouldn't upset me, but it does.

kikibaby · August 2010

I wonder what percentage of women are actually perfectly happy with their body? The number has to be very low, and is probably mostly comprised of supermodels.

danieliza1127 · August 2010

Kiki, I bet even supermodels aren't happy with their bodies. Imagine the pressure they're under to stay "perfect". I bet even their pictures get airbrushed and photoshopped.

kikibaby · August 2010

Actually... do you think women get more satisifed as they get older? Do you think this is mostly a young person's affliction?

I ask because I have some friends that are in their mid-late 40's. All 3 of these ladies seem very secure with their bodies. I went on vacation with 2 of them, and they had no qualms about walking around naked, while I was hiding in the bathroom. They're by no means perfect, but they seem really confident in their skin.

danieliza1127 · August 2010

Just based on watching Oprah, I think yes, women get more confident and just happier with who they are as they get older. At least according to a lot of Oprah shows I've seen, SO many women say when they hit their 40s or 50s, they just come into their own. I'm sure this varies for every woman though. I just think you must get to a point where you just know this is who you are, and you like yourself and are happy, and that's that.

kikibaby · August 2010

I can't wait to reach that point, dani

wadingmoose · August 2010

I remember a long time ago (before she had her own show) Tyra Banks was on Oprah and they were talking about some magazine shoot she'd done and she was pissed that they'd airbrushed her hips out and basically she came out and said that the body on the cover was not hers, it had been changed so much.

I think that's about when she stopped modelling so much.

Imagine being a famous model and seeing that your body really wasn't good enough still.

wadingmoose · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d4cc5201-ee41-4e12-885f-4b183ac9e379Post:aa570b75-09e6-4723-ac93-ec6ba5fe120e">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]Just based on watching Oprah, I think yes, women get more confident and just happier with who they are as they get older. At least according to a lot of Oprah shows I've seen, SO many women say when they hit their 40s or 50s, they just come into their own. I'm sure this varies for every woman though. I just think you must get to a point where you just know this is who you are, and you like yourself and are happy, and that's that.
Posted by danieliza1127[/QUOTE]

So, I've got between 6 and 16 years left to hate myself. :) Awesome.

Audrey&Austin · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d4cc5201-ee41-4e12-885f-4b183ac9e379Post:f461d480-c09f-4cc1-a729-52ba0b9a3e32">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]Actually... do you think women get more satisifed as they get older? Do you think this is mostly a young person's affliction? I ask because I have some friends that are in their mid-late 40's. All 3 of these ladies seem very secure with their bodies. I went on vacation with 2 of them, and they had no qualms about walking around naked, while I was hiding in the bathroom. They're by no means perfect, but they seem really confident in their skin.
Posted by kikibaby[/QUOTE]
I don't think age really has too much to do with it. A lot of the times, its a totally mental thing. My parents constantly would belittle me and I will always have this voice in my head telling me I'm not good enough or pretty enough or skinny enough, whether I"m 15 or 55. I feel like its the way the perception of beauty has changed in the past 50 years and that's why people that are older are usually more comfortable with their bodies. Take Marilyn Monroe for example. She was what is considered a 12 (someone that's large in a lot of people's eyes nowadays) and she was the ultimate symbol for beauty. Now, people have 00 women that are airbrushed into nothingness to strive for.

That could be total BS, though. <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-laughing.gif" border="0" alt="Laughing" title="Laughing" /> Its just my opinion on the matter.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · August 2010

I'm 5'4, 134 lbs right now - and I feckin' love my body.

Also, KPS sucks usually.

danieliza1127 · August 2010

Yeah who knows, it's all a crap shoot. My Mom was always worried about her weight but the older she got, the more it was health related, not beauty related. Then a few years ago, her and my Step-dad went on the South Beach Diet, lost a bunch of weight and have kept it off.

She has always made little comments about my weight here and there, or will say things like "you should get it off now while you're young because it only gets harder the older you get" and I feel like - um thanks? It's hard not to take that personally. I don't really think I have a lot to lose, but I could definitely lose some sure.

Anyway, now I'm rambling. Yep Kiki and Moose, only 10 more years to go for me!

wadingmoose · August 2010

I don't know that I'd say KPS sucks. The callout posts on KPS suck.

The actual secrets are cool. And obviously take a lot for someone to post.

danieliza1127 · August 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_kps-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:d4cc5201-ee41-4e12-885f-4b183ac9e379Post:cfcf79f1-acc1-41e7-b679-93bb4745f429">Re: KPS</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't know that I'd say KPS sucks. The callout posts on KPS suck. The actual secrets are cool. And obviously take a lot for someone to post.
Posted by wadingmoose[/QUOTE]

I agree. And some result in good discussions.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · August 2010

I think the actual secrets are usually pretty cool - but yeah, the response secrets and then the response response secrets aren't even secrets, and sometimes the site just turns into an anonymous bitch fest.

And yet I still look at it from time to time, so, there's that.

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