I think its fine! I'm going to use facebook for my dance invitations for the ppl I know are online all the time...And lets be honest, most ppl check their facebook before they check their mail !hahaha
It's so bizarre that so many people are insisting that you call them. I don't even have phone numbers for most of my ~super-close~ friends - I just don't know anyone under the age of 30 who really uses the phone all that much anymore (except for texting!).
If it's your grandma that you're tracking down, then a phone call is certainly the more appropriate option. But if it's a friend, and you're used to contacting this friend through e-mail or Facebook or AIM or texting or however you would contact them about anything else - then use that. There's simply no need to track down phone numbers and make a special phone call for people who are not used to getting phone calls from you.
The etiquette hounds can jump all over me, but common sense should always trump etiquette. If we haven't talked on the phone in years but constantly communicate through Facebook, I would be really confused by a phone call.
Facebook allows you to create "Events" and send an invite out to all of your friends. Even though I'm still using formal invitations, I'm going to create one just to be as a reminder. Everytime they log on, they can see me and the date at my event right on the computer screen. It also allows them to RSVP or send a message. You might try sending one that out to all of your friends to serve as a "Save the Date" and then see if any of your guests reply-- If not, send alil message....
We used a FB event to get informtaion out to family members as soon as posible, even before the invites went out. Info like where the block of rooms were reserved, where the bridal party need to be for ordering tux/dresses. We did invite people to the event, but did not count that as their RSVP. However, I have had several family and friends post their RSVP on my FB page themselves. So I say in this day and age, use what ever you need to use!
Like most everyone else that has respond, do what you want. I made my invites(for those who got a paper one) and I also used facebook. But my family and friends know me well enough. I don't like wasting paper or money on something that will only be thrown away. So the ones that I am mailing(to family that is out of town) will have a RSVP card it will have a stamp. The ones that we are hand delivering to close friends and family will not have a stamp they will be told to hand it back to me. Now for the ones on facebook loved that they didn't get an invit to only throw away at the end of it. And the ones that haven't responded yet on FB got a litttle email reminding them about checking their event invites. After I did that I got about 10 more that RSVP'd within a few minutes.
Keep in mind not everyine keeps up with the events they get sent. So I would also send an email to them.
I know people wont agree, but I would be bothered if someone RSVP was anything other than the RSVP card I sent with the self addressed envelope that already has the stamp on it. It takes just as much effort to type and email or log on to facebook as it does to mark accept or decline and drop in the mail. I had to pay for the RSVP cards, and stamps, I sent them to the intended persons, and they should have the decency to send them back.
As for following up on people who have not responded. I would assume they haven't because they aren't planning to attend, so I think it would be the responsibility of the one who's guest they are (ie Mother in Laws family or friend should be up to her to get a hold of) If they are your guest you should be able to just call them and say... Hey I haven't received your RSVP, if you could sent that back I would really appreciate it. A phone call is much more personal, and this is someone who you personally invited.
I say call them....anyone who doesn't return the card deserves a call, some people misplace the card or get busy and forget. I think it is more personal to call, many people don't check email ...now if it is a person who never answer the phone and is alway on fb or a social site...then go ahead and track them down that way.
I actually just set mine up on facebook and in just an hour I had 8 people RSVP. I sent my invites out 2 weeks ago and haven't recieved a single RSVP, if that tells you anything. I don't think it's tacky for 1: you're going green, saving paper and money. 2: who doesn't use the internet more than the mailbox? 3: it's alot easier to keep track of RSVPs on sites such as facebook because it lists who is attending and who is not without you doing any work!
Hey there to be honest I used facebook to get address from my friends and family that I didn't have, plus I got there e-mail so I didn't have to keep facebooking them but even then some of them didn't respond to the emails i sent....so while it is somewhat tacky, you may need to use it for some of those certain people that only use Facebook as their personal email.
I'm eco friendly, so we sent our STD on FB and Myspace to close friends. Lets face it, its easier to track down folks on FB than it is by any other means.
Your guests should RSVP the way you've asked them to in your invitation. Whether it be by return card or an online RSVP system.
In terms of tracking down those who haven't responded - I know it's an easy thing to say "well, f-it, they didn't respond so they're not going," but that will leave you open to random people coming without notice.
My opinion, track them down as best you can. Whether it be email, phone or facebook. If it's past your "reply by" date. It's OK to be a pest. You need to know and they should deal with the consequences if they're going to be irresponsible. Facebook is a great option - but don't use it as the ONLY way to get in contact with the person.
Funny that I ran into this post, I just messaged a couple of relatives I don't see often (and don't have phone numbers for) on Facebook to remind them to please send their card back to me. I don't think it is tacky or wrong at all--sometimes that just how people keep in touch with eachother, and I think that is ok.
I used facebook to get address from my friends so that we could send them their invites through the mail. But with their invites is an RSVP card that will tell them how to RSVP for our wedding. We set up an email address specifically for the wedding, and we are asking people to send a message to that email. We also put on the card for them to call my parent's home to RSVP if they don't have access to the internet. I'm hesitant about doing facebook invites or a facebook group for the wedding, because I'll probably forget to fix the privacy settings, and not everyone who is a friend on my facebook is invited. So I sent individual private messages to get address from our friends.
If worse comes to worse, I will call or text or fb message someone to make sure I know if they are coming or not. But because I don't want to put people on the spot, phone calls will probably be my last resort.
~*Sheldon
Some days are fast, some are slow. But each day is a day closer to marrying the man that God set aside for me.
Oops, I hit the wrong button on the poll...I meant to say, yes I think it's fine, get a hold of them any way you can...although I agree, calling first would be ideal.
My FH had to send out a FB message to HALF his family members. They just "assumed" that we knew they were coming... hello! We're not mind readers! He tried calling some of them with no answer, and didn't have other phone numbers. They all replied to his facebook message fairly promptly.
Re: Tracking down no responses
I think its fine! I'm going to use facebook for my dance invitations for the ppl I know are online all the time...And lets be honest, most ppl check their facebook before they check their mail !hahaha
If it's your grandma that you're tracking down, then a phone call is certainly the more appropriate option. But if it's a friend, and you're used to contacting this friend through e-mail or Facebook or AIM or texting or however you would contact them about anything else - then use that. There's simply no need to track down phone numbers and make a special phone call for people who are not used to getting phone calls from you.
The etiquette hounds can jump all over me, but common sense should always trump etiquette. If we haven't talked on the phone in years but constantly communicate through Facebook, I would be really confused by a phone call.
We used a FB event to get informtaion out to family members as soon as posible, even before the invites went out. Info like where the block of rooms were reserved, where the bridal party need to be for ordering tux/dresses. We did invite people to the event, but did not count that as their RSVP. However, I have had several family and friends post their RSVP on my FB page themselves. So I say in this day and age, use what ever you need to use!
Keep in mind not everyine keeps up with the events they get sent. So I would also send an email to them.
As for following up on people who have not responded. I would assume they haven't because they aren't planning to attend, so I think it would be the responsibility of the one who's guest they are (ie Mother in Laws family or friend should be up to her to get a hold of) If they are your guest you should be able to just call them and say... Hey I haven't received your RSVP, if you could sent that back I would really appreciate it. A phone call is much more personal, and this is someone who you personally invited.
Good luck
Megan
I'm eco friendly, so we sent our STD on FB and Myspace to close friends. Lets face it, its easier to track down folks on FB than it is by any other means.
In terms of tracking down those who haven't responded - I know it's an easy thing to say "well, f-it, they didn't respond so they're not going," but that will leave you open to random people coming without notice.
My opinion, track them down as best you can. Whether it be email, phone or facebook. If it's past your "reply by" date. It's OK to be a pest. You need to know and they should deal with the consequences if they're going to be irresponsible. Facebook is a great option - but don't use it as the ONLY way to get in contact with the person.
If worse comes to worse, I will call or text or fb message someone to make sure I know if they are coming or not. But because I don't want to put people on the spot, phone calls will probably be my last resort.
@Honeybunches, i'm totally with you on the phone thing--I really hate making calls, of course I will when i have to but i hate it.
So helpful! Sounds like FB isn't as tacky as I was afraid it would be for tracking down those flakes and miscreants that can't put a card in the mail.
If you want to send emails do it, if you want to do it on FB fine.....Its your day and probably your money so do it how you want!
Good Luck Brides to be!