so much to comment on... a: as for throwing yourself a party, i dont think its so terrible, as long as you know youre guests and keep it casual, its no big deal. b: as for changing your story after negative response, grow up learn to stick your ground. if you just simplified the request for advice by leaving out the detail about your parents throwing it, fine. c: as for you mommy coming online to post, its not convincing when she uses your sn and doesnt care about her own grammer and spelling. and is pathetically hilarious that you would LET her come on AS you. d: as for being so super upset that people voiced their opinion online, you really should have lurked for a while. i would recommend lookingi nt he etiquitte boards at posts with lots of responses. you will get to know your audience. but i think you should just be you, dont worry what other people think.
e: as for your original question, i agree with other advisers' posts, google bbq themed invitations.
if you want your invite to combine the bbq theme and engaged theme. make a cake with like a bbq grill on it with a pair of rings as the handle on the top of the grill, or have a tuxedo wearing groom with a "kiss the cook" apron, a gown wearing bride holding a tray with "youre invited" on it. or a kneeling groom with a c cheeseburger on a tray instead of the ring, and a bride with a bib, accepting. something like that. simply combine some clip art and print your own.
or if you dont want to DIY and you want to be simple, i would get some premade BBQ themed invitations and leave it at that.
thanks guys! this is what i was kind of looking for all night...not the opinions...
HisCB.. i know it wasnt right for my mom to get on mine..cause people though it was me..i told her to get her own..thats here or there. i did change my story but it was true...my fiance and i originally planned a get together that my parents turned into an engagement party. so i just said we were having an engagement party for us since it was family and nothing to big.. thanks for the info...ive been on google all night looking..
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:3d961d7a-b3b9-48b4-a615-bc75e6518bc6">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE]Busy and kind of burned out on school, but otherwise surviving. You're getting so close to being murried! Posted by Night_Sprite[/QUOTE]
I know! I can't believe it's almost here. I really just want it to be over with. I've discovered weddings are not my thing. I'm sorry you're burned out. How much longer do you have? Do you want me to sing you a song to make you happy?
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:0054c9b5-4677-41a0-9227-b96694121413">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE]i wasnt ever doing it in the 1st place...hello? I said i was b/c it was my fiance's and I idea to have a get together, my parents turned it to a engagement party... and the irony is that you keep commenting on my blog..if you have no advice...move on Posted by niki12301[/QUOTE]
Hm, another mention of a thread/post as a "blog." And yes, "FI" is the short-hand terminology we use for fiance on this board. If you'd lurked at all, you'd know this. Then again, if you'd lurked at all, this whole thread would probably never have happened because you'd know better.
ETA: Cew, I should have known you'd catch the blog thing. ;) I was wondering if it was our old friend C there for a minute!
Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?
"cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:eb3f21ac-65bd-4f48-bff3-88c82fc1083f">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE]well what kind of mother would i be if i didnt care about my family!!! i don't worry about proper spelling or punctuation when dealing with people who have done everything but give advice...i don't need my own page, because i try to stay away from rude and childish people like the kind i have come across....also if you don't like that i have come to my "daughters rescue" than dont respond...she is old enought to take care of herself, i just didn't think it was proper for total strangers to comment on anything in her life, especially when you know nothing of it!! it is and will be an engagment party. she was never giving herself one to begin with. so let this alone...grow up and find someone else to bitch at!!! Posted by niki12301[/QUOTE]
Please re-read. Every.single.one of my posts was 100% full of advice. Some that you requested, and some that you didn't, but all of it was, in fact, advice. And - I have yet to call you names.
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:38ca064f-ad10-4561-a67e-b6606442d539">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE]F*** all of you and your marriages...may you all have happy divorces and lots lawyer fees. BITHCES. Posted by niki12301[/QUOTE]
And good grief - where did this come from? Seriously - you got advice. Just because you didn't like it doesn't mean this is a reasonable response.
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:a99d980b-9116-47fa-88ab-1c3b27201e61">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE]In Response to Re: engagement party invites... : I know! I can't believe it's almost here. I really just want it to be over with. I've discovered weddings are not my thing. I'm sorry you're burned out. How much longer do you have? Do you want me to sing you a song to make you happy? Posted by cew515[/QUOTE] I am done the second week of May. Ugh. You can sing me songs all day every day if you want to. I'm knotting and typing a mini paper. I'm a machine.
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:0054c9b5-4677-41a0-9227-b96694121413">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE]i wasnt ever doing it in the 1st place...hello? I said i was b/c it was my fiance's and I idea to have a get together, my parents turned it to a engagement party... and the irony is that you keep commenting on my <strong>blog</strong>..if you have no advice...move on Posted by niki12301[/QUOTE]
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:ef54c673-28d3-47ec-a4a3-7df69291f7bf">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE]In Response to Re: engagement party invites... : Please re-read. Every.single.one of my posts was 100% full of advice. Some that you requested, and some that you didn't, but all of it was, in fact, advice. And - I have yet to call you names. Posted by squirrly[/QUOTE]
Squirrly, I thought your advice was very well-rounded, and included a bonus helpful etiquette tip about throwing your own e-party. Maybe the mom didn't read that far back? Or are we still talking to her or the daughter now? I can't keep track.
Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?
"cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:775d2c5f-d315-4432-9414-f4945d4bf7a4">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE]I am truly fascinated by the post = blog phenomenon. Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]
This. Just because you're putting something on the internet, it doesn't mean it's a blog.
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:894da629-e543-4da3-9bc0-5f35c90ec606">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE]thanks it will..cause my FIANCE (FI.. REALLY?) is def not like you people. Posted by niki12301[/QUOTE] he DEFINITELY (DEF.. REALLY?) is not.
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:36f6619e-28cb-4731-acb0-f168d2876eba">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE]Niki - Might I suggest the WeddingBee.com forums? They're not as rude there. Posted by jenniferceline[/QUOTE]
Jennifer, no one was rude to her until she cursed and called us all bitches, and wished us expensive divorces. I doubt that would fly on WeddingBee. We did, however, give her very truthful, straightforward advice & suggestions. I still fail to see why she failed to see that, though.
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:775d2c5f-d315-4432-9414-f4945d4bf7a4">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE]I am truly fascinated by the post = blog phenomenon. Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]
<div>It seems to be also coupled with bad spelling/grammar. </div>
Jennifer...thank you i'll try that site.. and yes i called people that b/c most of you like squirrly...were giving me advice on etiquette and what i should and shouldn't do and saying how chiidish i was.all of this having nothing to do with my question... "where to buy good invites"
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:4b1993cd-3646-4ba3-b71c-de60835882f4">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE]Jennifer...thank you i'll try that site.. and yes i called people that b/c most of you like squirrly...were giving me advice on etiquette and what i should and shouldn't do and saying how chiidish i was.all of this having nothing to do with my question... "where to buy good invites" Posted by niki12301[/QUOTE]
::eye roll:: Somebody totally missed the point of message boards....
Wow. I haven't been on the knot boards in a long time but read about this elsewhere. How sad for women in general. If she wants to throw herself a party celebrating how wonderful she is or announcing the fact that she bought a new shirt, LET HER. She did not come here to ask for advice on etiquette. If you asked a waitress for the specials and she told you not to put your elbows on the table, wouldn't that be a bit off? And is no one familiar with the phrase "it's not what you said, it's how you said it?" Regardless of what you meant to say, the way it comes across does not imply that you have her best interests at heart. This is the perfect example of why women are called catty and vindictive. We are supposed to be in one of the most exciting times of our lives. Why bring one another down? Regardless of whether or not you agree with her decisions, or anyone's, why is there a need to be so cruel? Of course she got defensive. Did she use the best choice of words? Maybe not, but she was backed against a wall. This reads like something straight out of a teen movie. I wish that all of you will be met with more support the next time you inquire about something you don't necessarily agree with because I would never wish this cruelty on anyone.
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:542fc31e-98dd-4331-8858-c0f9a2b8738b">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE]In Response to Re: engagement party invites... : he DEFINITELY (DEF.. REALLY?) is not. Posted by daffodil_jill[/QUOTE]
In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_engagement-party-invites?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:0af23fdb-a144-41c9-aeff-ecdfd1cdfdaaPost:c7356a20-3557-4670-93c7-e0c3f085b441">Re: engagement party invites...</a>: [QUOTE] If she wants to throw herself a party celebrating how wonderful she is or announcing the fact that she bought a new shirt, LET HER. She did not come here to ask for advice on etiquette. If you asked a waitress for the specials and she told you not to put your elbows on the table, wouldn't that be a bit off? Posted by beth1125[/QUOTE]
This is not about her throwing a party for herself to celebrate how wonderful she is (though that's just a peachy idea). This is about throwing a wedding-related event for herself (as it originally sounded like she was doing). This has a specific etiquette that doesn't exist for other frivolous, self-congratulatory parties, and this being a wedding site, a breach of that etiquette will surely be noticed here and reacted to accordingly.
And for the last time, this is a public message forum. You don't come on here and order what you want, no extras. If you ask a question where there is clearly a glaring etiquette issue overshadowing it, it isn't <em>really </em>helpful for the ladies here to gloss over it and not say anything. Because if it's not said here, it would be said by the OP's guests behind her back.
Also, the waitress scenario is a poor analogy. It is a waitress' job to deliver services based on what the customer wants and requests. No one here works for anyone else, and therefore do not owe anyone the act of blindly listening to whatever they say and only giving them what they want to hear in response. Anyone who chooses to post on this board is <em>asking</em> the people here for their advice. How is it any less rude for the OP to ask for someone's time and attention on here, and then flipshit when she feels people don't agree with her opinion and are just trying to help?
Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?
"cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
No one is being paid here. Advice will be given based on how the posters choose to give it. If you don't want advice that's based on proper etiquette, don't ask on an international board.
And frankly, don't come on here with this as your thirteenth post getting ready to call women catty. Because that's not exactly doing much for "the sisterhood" either.
I gave great advice too. That you chose to dislike it is your own issue. I even gave you a site to view but apparently if you recommend a website AND tell someone what proper etiquette is then you're "catty".
Re: engagement party invites...
so much to comment on...
a: as for throwing yourself a party, i dont think its so terrible, as long as you know youre guests and keep it casual, its no big deal.
b: as for changing your story after negative response, grow up learn to stick your ground. if you just simplified the request for advice by leaving out the detail about your parents throwing it, fine.
c: as for you mommy coming online to post, its not convincing when she uses your sn and doesnt care about her own grammer and spelling. and is pathetically hilarious that you would LET her come on AS you.
d: as for being so super upset that people voiced their opinion online, you really should have lurked for a while. i would recommend lookingi nt he etiquitte boards at posts with lots of responses. you will get to know your audience. but i think you should just be you, dont worry what other people think.
e: as for your original question, i agree with other advisers' posts, google bbq themed invitations.
if you want your invite to combine the bbq theme and engaged theme.
make a cake with like a bbq grill on it with a pair of rings as the handle on the top of the grill, or have a tuxedo wearing groom with a "kiss the cook" apron, a gown wearing bride holding a tray with "youre invited" on it. or a kneeling groom with a c cheeseburger on a tray instead of the ring, and a bride with a bib, accepting. something like that. simply combine some clip art and print your own.
or if you dont want to DIY and you want to be simple, i would get some premade BBQ themed invitations and leave it at that.
HisCB.. i know it wasnt right for my mom to get on mine..cause people though it was me..i told her to get her own..thats here or there. i did change my story but it was true...my fiance and i originally planned a get together that my parents turned into an engagement party. so i just said we were having an engagement party for us since it was family and nothing to big.. thanks for the info...ive been on google all night looking..
[QUOTE]Busy and kind of burned out on school, but otherwise surviving. You're getting so close to being murried!
Posted by Night_Sprite[/QUOTE]
I know! I can't believe it's almost here. I really just want it to be over with. I've discovered weddings are not my thing. I'm sorry you're burned out. How much longer do you have? Do you want me to sing you a song to make you happy?
[QUOTE]i wasnt ever doing it in the 1st place...hello? I said i was b/c it was my fiance's and I idea to have a get together, my parents turned it to a engagement party... and the irony is that you keep commenting on my blog..if you have no advice...move on
Posted by niki12301[/QUOTE]
Hm, another mention of a thread/post as a "blog." And yes, "FI" is the short-hand terminology we use for fiance on this board. If you'd lurked at all, you'd know this. Then again, if you'd lurked at all, this whole thread would probably never have happened because you'd know better.
ETA: Cew, I should have known you'd catch the blog thing. ;) I was wondering if it was our old friend C there for a minute!
Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?
"cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
[QUOTE]well what kind of mother would i be if i didnt care about my family!!! i don't worry about proper spelling or punctuation when dealing with people who have done everything but give advice...i don't need my own page, because i try to stay away from rude and childish people like the kind i have come across....also if you don't like that i have come to my "daughters rescue" than dont respond...she is old enought to take care of herself, i just didn't think it was proper for total strangers to comment on anything in her life, especially when you know nothing of it!! it is and will be an engagment party. she was never giving herself one to begin with. so let this alone...grow up and find someone else to bitch at!!!
Posted by niki12301[/QUOTE]
Please re-read. Every.single.one of my posts was 100% full of advice. Some that you requested, and some that you didn't, but all of it was, in fact, advice. And - I have yet to call you names.
Dresses may be easier to take in than let out, but guest lists are not. -- kate51485
[QUOTE]F*** all of you and your marriages...may you all have happy divorces and lots lawyer fees. BITHCES.
Posted by niki12301[/QUOTE]
And good grief - where did this come from? Seriously - you got advice. Just because you didn't like it doesn't mean this is a reasonable response.
Dresses may be easier to take in than let out, but guest lists are not. -- kate51485
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: engagement party invites... : I know! I can't believe it's almost here. I really just want it to be over with. I've discovered weddings are not my thing. I'm sorry you're burned out. How much longer do you have? Do you want me to sing you a song to make you happy?
Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]
I am done the second week of May. Ugh. You can sing me songs all day every day if you want to. I'm knotting and typing a mini paper. I'm a machine.
[QUOTE]i wasnt ever doing it in the 1st place...hello? I said i was b/c it was my fiance's and I idea to have a get together, my parents turned it to a engagement party... and the irony is that you keep commenting on my <strong>blog</strong>..if you have no advice...move on
Posted by niki12301[/QUOTE]
Troll. Who is it?
Dresses may be easier to take in than let out, but guest lists are not. -- kate51485
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: engagement party invites... : Please re-read. Every.single.one of my posts was 100% full of advice. Some that you requested, and some that you didn't, but all of it was, in fact, advice. And - I have yet to call you names.
Posted by squirrly[/QUOTE]
Squirrly, I thought your advice was very well-rounded, and included a bonus helpful etiquette tip about throwing your own e-party. Maybe the mom didn't read that far back? Or are we still talking to her or the daughter now? I can't keep track.
Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?
"cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
[QUOTE]I am truly fascinated by the post = blog phenomenon.
Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]
This. Just because you're putting something on the internet, it doesn't mean it's a blog.
Dresses may be easier to take in than let out, but guest lists are not. -- kate51485
[QUOTE]thanks it will..cause my FIANCE (FI.. REALLY?) is def not like you people.
Posted by niki12301[/QUOTE]
he DEFINITELY (DEF.. REALLY?) is not.
My Planning Bio
[QUOTE]Niki - Might I suggest the WeddingBee.com forums? They're not as rude there.
Posted by jenniferceline[/QUOTE]
Jennifer, no one was rude to her until she cursed and called us all bitches, and wished us expensive divorces. I doubt that would fly on WeddingBee. We did, however, give her very truthful, straightforward advice & suggestions. I still fail to see why she failed to see that, though.
Dresses may be easier to take in than let out, but guest lists are not. -- kate51485
[QUOTE]I am truly fascinated by the post = blog phenomenon.
Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]
<div>It seems to be also coupled with bad spelling/grammar. </div>
[QUOTE]Jennifer...thank you i'll try that site.. and yes i called people that b/c most of you like squirrly...were giving me advice on etiquette and what i should and shouldn't do and saying how chiidish i was.all of this having nothing to do with my question... "where to buy good invites"
Posted by niki12301[/QUOTE]
::eye roll:: Somebody totally missed the point of message boards....
@niki- In response to your original question, I love these:
http://shop.hobbylobby.com/products/invitation-engagement-ring-702324/
Best of luck! And Congratulations!
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: engagement party invites... : he DEFINITELY (DEF.. REALLY?) is not.
Posted by daffodil_jill[/QUOTE]
i was just gonna say that!
[QUOTE] If she wants to throw herself a party celebrating how wonderful she is or announcing the fact that she bought a new shirt, LET HER. She did not come here to ask for advice on etiquette. If you asked a waitress for the specials and she told you not to put your elbows on the table, wouldn't that be a bit off?
Posted by beth1125[/QUOTE]
This is not about her throwing a party for herself to celebrate how wonderful she is (though that's just a peachy idea). This is about throwing a wedding-related event for herself (as it originally sounded like she was doing). This has a specific etiquette that doesn't exist for other frivolous, self-congratulatory parties, and this being a wedding site, a breach of that etiquette will surely be noticed here and reacted to accordingly.
And for the last time, this is a public message forum. You don't come on here and order what you want, no extras. If you ask a question where there is clearly a glaring etiquette issue overshadowing it, it isn't <em>really </em>helpful for the ladies here to gloss over it and not say anything. Because if it's not said here, it would be said by the OP's guests behind her back.
Also, the waitress scenario is a poor analogy. It is a waitress' job to deliver services based on what the customer wants and requests. No one here works for anyone else, and therefore do not owe anyone the act of blindly listening to whatever they say and only giving them what they want to hear in response. Anyone who chooses to post on this board is <em>asking</em> the people here for their advice. How is it any less rude for the OP to ask for someone's time and attention on here, and then flipshit when she feels people don't agree with her opinion and are just trying to help?
Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?
"cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
No one is being paid here. Advice will be given based on how the posters choose to give it. If you don't want advice that's based on proper etiquette, don't ask on an international board.
And frankly, don't come on here with this as your thirteenth post getting ready to call women catty. Because that's not exactly doing much for "the sisterhood" either.
I gave great advice too. That you chose to dislike it is your own issue. I even gave you a site to view but apparently if you recommend a website AND tell someone what proper etiquette is then you're "catty".